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Original poster

Small wedding (with a tiny budget)

68 replies

Purplesndteal · 18/05/2020 17:20

Posting here for traffic. I hope you lovely MN will be able to guide me with some hoenst opinions as the world of FB groups either doesn't have an opinion or are (IMO) just being nice for the sake of it.

We're having a registry office wedding. Seating capacity is about 50. We're planning to have our reception in our house which is literally down the road. Our outside space is absolutely tiny (8x12ft) plus a decked are of 2x8ft. We have your average size dining and lounge rooms for a late 19th century terraced house. We have a galley kitchen so that space doesn't count.

How many guests do you think would fit in all areas? We think optimistically about 50 but more like 30.

Would geueata be ok so be standing for some of the time? (Realistically we can sit around 25).

It's all DIY (think afternoon tea after the ceremony) with maybe having something more filling later in the evening (kebabs / pasties).

We'd have an "open bar" (think cocktails in drink dispensers), bubbly, beer and maybe wine.

I like the whole idea, but I don't know if our guests would appreciate it TBH. What do you think?

OP posts:
maresydoats · 19/05/2020 11:03

When is the wedding OP?

Will it be impacted by social distancing and mingling with those outside of the family household etc.?

Just wondered, but you may already have thought of that in planning your date.

If it were me, I'd pare the numbers right down to ten fifteen or so for comfort, safety and room to sit indoors if weather is not good.

Best of luck anyway hope it all works out.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 11:11

maresydotes It would be in April next year. Considering my family would be coming from abroad life would have to.come back to as normal as possible.

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VenusClapTrap · 19/05/2020 11:17

I wouldn’t go any bigger than 20-25. Everyone needs to be able to sit down, inside. April can be very cold, even if it’s dry.

Unless you have a large number of smokers - you can safely assume they’ll spend 99% of the time in the garden, so could reasonably up your numbers a bit if there are lots of them.

Interested in this thread?

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Weddings
Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 12:04

I think it we'd still need an RSVP . I think all local.people would definitely come it's the people.who have to travel.to come who I think might not show up.

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Original poster
Purplesndteal · 20/05/2020 07:36

The more I think about it, the more I'm sure I'd rather invite fewer people than compromise on my "ideal" day. I still can't figure if I should.invite that couple that were semi close to but that would.open a pandora box of othe people we're not inviting.

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Porridgeoat · 20/05/2020 07:45

Buy 8 folding chairs so they can be folded out of the way if they are more of a hazard

30 including yourself and DH.

Roselilly36 · 20/05/2020 07:57

Many congrats OP Flowers.

Your plans sound lovely, I much prefer these weddings, the only thing I would suggest to allow you to enjoy the day, would be have the cream tea after your wedding perhaps for a limited number of guests perhaps your older guests so you could halve the number in your home, and enjoy your time with them and then the rest of your guests can arrive later in the evening. Just a thought.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 20/05/2020 08:34

Originally it was supposed to be just our mum's, children and siblings (and their families) to the actual.wedding. However it turns out that we need to book the biggest room in the registry office anyways so we thought we might as well invite anybody we'd invite to the reception

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CatBatCat · 20/05/2020 09:43

How big is your garden? You could hire a gazebo/marqee for more space in case it rains and an extra portaloo.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 20/05/2020 10:00

The garden is tiny! 20x10ft and that includes the decking area. (It's a courtyard patio so at least it won't get muddy)

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Hamsterian · 20/05/2020 10:18

I can see what you’re going for and it would be really lovely, but you can’t have more than 20 guests. Otherwise it will be really uncomfortable for the guests. It sounds like there isn’t space to put hired furniture for extra seats and a few tables. You also need decent space around the table you are going to serve food on, people need to circulate. Low key weddings are the best because they are relaxed, but only work the space is comfortable for the number of guests and the different types of weather, the food is lovely and easily accessible, you can have the food sitting down if you wanted to (the option needs to be there) and there are no big queues for the toilet. Fifty people to one toilet is simply too much, I have IBS and that would massively stress me out (being on the toilet and knowing other people are queiuing or needing the toilet and having to wait loads).
Weddings at home can be charming but there is a reason people usually go for village halls etc. You can make it look really nice.
You mentioned your children may want to go up to the bedroom, I’m sure they can be at their parents’ wedding without needing time out. They’ll have plenty of space to run around in a village hall.

SheWranglesRugRats · 20/05/2020 11:21

We did this, had about 30 guests at home. It would’ve been great except it pissed it down with rain and we were all huddled under makeshift Marquees.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 20/05/2020 11:37

Hamsterian our 13yo hates crowds and hates strangers even more... Considering these people will be more like strangers to him, I'd like to give him that option.

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Original poster
Purplesndteal · 20/05/2020 11:40

We're a blended family BTW which is not a problem in itself but the children haven't met my side of the family (apart from my mum). We went once to 13yo birthday party and our boy didn't have the best of times (it was my friend's daughter party).

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EmpressJewel · 20/05/2020 11:55

It sounds like a lovely idea. If you are limiting numbers, you are probably just inviting the people closest to you anyway, so I'm sure they will be just happy to see you get married and celebrate with you at home.

I think you will need enough chairs for everyone, so get a couple of extra fold up chairs (borrow them if you can)

I'd recommend getting some help on the day. When we've hosted family, despite setting up everything in advance, we still end up running around after people (Do you have ice, I'd like a cuppa, where is the ketchup etc). Draft in a couple of teens for extra pocket money to run around so that you can spend time with your guests.

Have you considered if you can get caterers in. My Mum ordered a huge curry, rice and sides from a local restaurant for 20 people and I think it was under £200.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 20/05/2020 12:02

Yes, I've thought of caterers. I think the sandwiches most likely I'll order them from Waitrose. Plus that kebab place but then again I don't know if everybody will like that

OP posts:
mencken · 20/05/2020 13:56

you will be remembered as 'the wedding with the huge queue for the toilet'. Think of the maximum you would invite for dinner and stick at that.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 20/05/2020 14:41

mencken that wouldn't even include our immediate family! I've hosted massive parties in the past with just one toilet and it wasn't an issue.

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