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Original poster

Small wedding (with a tiny budget)

68 replies

Purplesndteal · 18/05/2020 17:20

Posting here for traffic. I hope you lovely MN will be able to guide me with some hoenst opinions as the world of FB groups either doesn't have an opinion or are (IMO) just being nice for the sake of it.

We're having a registry office wedding. Seating capacity is about 50. We're planning to have our reception in our house which is literally down the road. Our outside space is absolutely tiny (8x12ft) plus a decked are of 2x8ft. We have your average size dining and lounge rooms for a late 19th century terraced house. We have a galley kitchen so that space doesn't count.

How many guests do you think would fit in all areas? We think optimistically about 50 but more like 30.

Would geueata be ok so be standing for some of the time? (Realistically we can sit around 25).

It's all DIY (think afternoon tea after the ceremony) with maybe having something more filling later in the evening (kebabs / pasties).

We'd have an "open bar" (think cocktails in drink dispensers), bubbly, beer and maybe wine.

I like the whole idea, but I don't know if our guests would appreciate it TBH. What do you think?

OP posts:
Original poster
Purplesndteal · 18/05/2020 22:00

User how many guests did you have?

I'm thinking of having two different times on in the invitation one for the ceremony and another.one for the reception giving us enough time to set up shop.

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Itisbetter · 18/05/2020 22:17

Don’t have a pause in between wedding and party. People turn up early or go to the pub and then turn up late. The toilet is the difficulty. If you have a front garden you could hire a portaloo for the gents and have the ladies up stairs? I think ten people in each room is tight but bearable. So you could do about 40. Can you cover the garden? April can be a bit rainy. All this is assuming you can have this sort of gathering by then.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 07:13

I think we can cover the courtyard/patio but there's no front garden, just a door right on the pavement.

OP posts:

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Weddings
Elouera · 19/05/2020 07:49

Could you get to know the neighbours this year, and use part of their garden too?

TSSDNCOP · 19/05/2020 07:55

Can you take big furniture out of the sitting room for the day and pile it in your bedroom?

I'd hire as many of the function room chairs as possible and place them in groups of 3/4 in all the corners.

The 1 loo wouldn't bother me, but standing up with no chance of a seat would really be wearisome.

I agree on 20-30 guests.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 08:04

We all have courtyi so no much help from neighbours apart from maybe an extra toilet.

Lounge can sit 15 people easily. Dining room at least 10 but it all depends where I put the food.

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BarbaraofSeville · 19/05/2020 08:22

I'd really rethink this idea, sorry. Have you been and looked at your local village halls? Some of them might be fine and far more suitable for a gathering.

We have an annual family party that usually attracts 20-25 guests and we have a big garden, big kitchen extension and only one toilet and it does get quite crowded and chaotic so I can only imagine how much worse, and stressful it would be with at least twice as many people in what sounds like a smaller space.

One problem is that people like to move around and chat to each other, so you won't get 15 people sitting nicely in the lounge, 10 in the dining room and the rest outside, they'll be trying to mingle, get food, go to the toilet etc and you'll have bottlenecks in hallways, outside the bathroom etc.

PotteringAlong · 19/05/2020 08:27

Your house isn’t big enough for what you want. If it’s lashing down with rain then everyone will need to be inside. So, from your own numbers, that’s about 20 people max. Even if it’s lovely weather, You cannot have 50 people using one toilet, especially when they’re drinking lots of liquid!

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 08:36

In my previous house I used to host quite a bit. We had about 60/70 guests at some point and not enough chairs! There was a massive garden though. We only let them use the downstairs toilet (nobody seemed to mind) and IME people didn't mingle at all. They stayed within the people they knew (even after the third party people kept doing the same). This is a completely different set of people, but I wouldn't expect them to mingle.either. I think.hia family would stick together, so would mine. The other two sets of guests are his workmates and my friends from my congregation

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AllTheCakes · 19/05/2020 08:45

Surely the stress of having to cater and serve everyone isn’t worth it? It sounds like people will be crammed in like sardines!

I like the idea of a relaxed afternoon tea at home, but not with one toilet and nowhere to sit.

Katinski · 19/05/2020 08:54

I've twice been to receptions at our local pub.They roped off an area in the pub,ditto the car park,family/friends supplied the cold buffet,pub supplied the booze, both were BRILLIANT!
There again, we weren't in lockdown....
Should you be getting married when pubs are open again, it's certainly worth asking them.
All the best,Flowers

totallyyesno · 19/05/2020 09:06

I like the idea of a relaxed afternoon tea at home, but not with one toilet and nowhere to sit.
This.

DonLewis · 19/05/2020 09:17

All food prepped before hand and laid out on the worktops in the kitchen. Make the back room the drinks station. Remove as much furniture except seats as possible. Each downstairs reception room needs as many seats as possible. Get a marquee in the garden. Get a cheap off cut of carpet for it and make the marquee a bedouin tent. Some seats, but cushions, lots and lots of cushions. And lights.

And embrace the mayhem
Could be lots of fun!

PowerStruggle · 19/05/2020 09:22

I think maybe just carve out a wee bit of budget and rent a hall somewhere. You can do this pretty cheaply. I just don’t think your house is really set up properly for this not to be a bit of a pain for people 😬

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 09:24

Gosh I had a proper reply but deleted it by mistake! Anywho we have 50 people tops (and that's including us).

Of those I reckon 8 won't come as it involves international travel. 5 would come all the way from London, so they might or might not come.

The other big group is my congregation friends (15) but as much as I love them I almost feel they deserve their own party, plus if I don't invite all would they get offended? I think we should at least invite the ones who invited us to their wedding.

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Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 09:55

I really don't like village halls (the kitchens in particular) . They're ok for children's parties but definitely wouldn't use one for my wedding.
I'd rather reduce my guest list.

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IckyIsAFuckingStupidWord · 19/05/2020 10:15

We hired a village hall for our wedding reception and a christening reception (different village halls) and the kitchens were newly fitted with clean, good quality utensils and crockery. The rooms themselves were bland pre-decoration but after we’d done, they were lovely.

But I guess it’s down to taste and budget at the end of the day as village halls tend to charge per hour plus the time you need to set up/pack away.

Bluesheep8 · 19/05/2020 10:21

It sounds lovely. But for me, space dictates family and a couple of close friends only.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 10:28

Village halls are cheap enough that's not the problem. What I've seen so.far is that most places don't cater for parties of our size (more like 30 realistically) and at least 10 of those are invited so they don't get offended. The registry office wedding is not cheap either! Close to £400

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Itisbetter · 19/05/2020 10:29

20 people can use a domestic toilet in an hour if they only take 3 minutes each. If the sewage runs across the back garden to the mains (on plans) check it can take that sort of volume ahead of times because it rises up the manhole cover if it goes wrong and will make for a very memorable event.
You need somewhere for them to wait outside the loo.
How old are your children? A kids zone can be a kindness, mini pop up tents in bedrooms can help.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 19/05/2020 10:34

I’d be inclined to hire a section in the pub. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to have the reception in the pub and then maybe a core group- likely family- go back to your house after for a cup of tea.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 10:47

Cricket just looked at the pub option... It would be at least £1200 for 40 guests and that doesn't include any sort of drinks.

That would be £2k on something I'm not very happy with.

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GrimmsFairytales · 19/05/2020 10:49

What I've seen so.far is that most places don't cater for parties of our size (more like 30 realistically)

I don't see how a village hall is less able to accommodate your guests than you would be in your house / tiny garden.

Original poster
Purplesndteal · 19/05/2020 10:52

I never said a village hall isn't less able, I simply don't like them for a wedding. And I meant "traditional" wedding venues .

I think the most reasonable thing to do is to not invite the congregation crowd and just have a separate thing with them

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Honeyroar · 19/05/2020 10:59

I think you’re really looking at 25/30 if you’re going to have it on a terraced house and it be comfortable for everyone. Be aware that the ones you think won’t turn up might do! Don’t bank on them being absent.