Neighbours painting our fence?

[CherryStoneTree]

We are in a new build, fence is ours and marked on both deeds as such. Neighbours are aware it’s ours. Both owners.

They’ve started painting their side today. I know the law states they should have asked our permission first, but we can’t exactly go and speak to them/go near the fence today. Do we let them do it in spirit of keeping things civil/haven’t had an issue with them before. And as long as the paint doesn’t bleed through it’s protecting the fence?

Before we moved into our house we were aware the sellers had replaced both sets of fencing even though it wasn't their full responsibility because neighbours A wouldn't contribute and was happy for their dog to keep roaming into the garden. Not sure why they did the other side unless it was to make it match. When neighbour A started growing plants up and through it we thought well maybe it's because its technically their fence knowing that the norm is normally one side belongs to one house. But neighbours B on the other side we're convinced they owned the side we shared because their other neighbours had said their other side was their fence and wasn't to be touched/planted against/etc. When neighbours B and we dug our deeds out we discovered that our road isn't normal in the fencing sense and that all fences are actually shared.

Thankfully both us and neighbours B had only weather treated the fences as that possibly would have not gone down well if we'd painted them an odd colour that bled through!

We need to paint our fence and it wouldn't occur to me NOT to mention it to our neighbours. Just seems like a courteous thing to do.

I think the lockdown is making lots of people argumentative.

Yes legally speaking they should have asked you if they could paint your fence but unless it bleeds through, causes damage or another issue I really would just leave it. It’s also perfectly possible to have a civilised conversation with your neighbours about this whilst keeping a 2 metre distance.

Our neighbours painted 'our' fence while we were away on holiday last year. Now our side is covered in drips and streaks of grey paint. I expected them to want to paint it of course but I think it wouldve just been good manners of them to mention it first. We wouldnt have said no.

Glad I’m not your neighbour

Never mind. You'll be allowed out soon. All manner of irritations await you out there OP. There are lots of people to fall out with over irrelevancies, why choose next door when the world is your oyster of pettiness?

Petty, petty, petty...are you the real life Larry David op

Oh I can see you why you have problems now OP. Well if they know they are meant to ask your permission and have dared not to do so I would say you have at least got the neighbours you deserve, so all is well. Enjoy your lawsuits and seething in your own juices, all over a bit of paint, alternatively you could worry over something that actually matters.

OP you are getting a rough time. Some people forget this is chat not AIBU. The nasties are our today.

I think in some cases people are justifying their previously cavalier behaviour of slapping paint on someone else’s fence without popping their head over that fence as asking. Also with some fences the neighbour would never see or know the other side was painted. But unfortunately in some circumstances it can ruin the aesthetics of a new, expensive fence.

Ignore the nasty name callers

OP, you know what you need to stop the horrible painty neighbours driving over your front garden leaving tyre tracks? Come on, you do know. You need a fence. Have you thought of installing one?

You are still not getting it though , yes the fences are yours in terms of your responsibility but they are a boundary and are no doubt on your land but are still a boundary .. did you grow up in a flat or a massive house without neighbours ? I'm not sure why you don't understand it's perfectly normal to 'own fences' but that's only so there is a responsibility to maintain them and no issues if one gets blown down or broken etc .

I had no idea people painted fences different colours. Is this a popular thing? I have lived most of my life in properties with gardens. Maybe I'm really unobservant!

@bess used to be shades of brown. Now it’s grey, green, purple, pink, black you name it.

There is a shade of blue that become very popular about ten years ago. Ghastly.

Yanbu OP.

It’s not petty, it’s criminal damage. If I painted the side of your car that faced my drive, I would commit an offence. Painting my side of your fence is the same thing.

My neighbour used one of those spray paint thingies. It went everywhere/ dripped all over my new decking, all through the fence and all over my washing. Was so angry but smiled to keep friendly

My neighbour has just put up a picket fence between our front gardens. They have painted their side white and have left our side plain as i said i don't like white fences. I'd love to stain it darker but there is no way of doing it without getting stain on the side of each plank which would upset them so I'll just leave it or do a double fence if i can be bothered. Again at the back that have an 8ft double slatted fence which they have painted white on their side and it would be impossible to paint or stain my side without affecting theirs. Luckily i like plain wood!

If this was a common approach then many gardens you see would have three different coloured fences, or there would be double fences
As it isn't, you have to assume that, no, people don't choose to paint both sides of 'their' fence, leaving their neighbour on the other side and the one on the bottom of the garden to choose their own colour. So you choose blue, neighbour A chooses green and neighbour B chooses brown. Lovely!

Um @CherryStoneTree you say

thank you for judging my character to someone after you, yourself have said this:

People are so lovely here today.
You’re probably all the same people telling people to “stay the fuck at home” and then posting pictures of yourself and your family on your daily walk no the beach, but want those living in London flats to not even open a window for 2 months.

to people who disagree with you. (I don't by the way, but you lost me at the above ridiculous judgement you made because you didn't like some replies).

Ridiculous non issue

Imagine this post was flipped. I’m going to paint my side of the fence - but I know it’s actually my neighbours fence and I’m not telling them. You’d be ripped to shreds on here for being so inconsiderate and a bad neighbour. Can’t win.

The neighbour who asked my permission was an elderly gentleman who had lived her for over fifty years - clearly asking permission didn’t seem ridiculous to him.

Unfortunately he made a real mess of it. But I couldn’t say anything because I told him to go ahead 😬

If they had asked we would have said yes, even if it wasn’t asking just saying “heads up were painting the fence today so you might want to keep an eye for drips, let us know if it comes through”.

@LindainLockdown lawsuits? That’s a bit of a jump for you. I said we didn’t say anything, nor ask them to stop when we saw them set up/start painting. Where did you get lawsuits? I was just musing on an anonymous forum what people’s feelings were, as you know heightened tensions and all that and wanted to know what the consensus was.

Seems painting people’s cars bad, painting fences to drip through to your side fine.

@longwayoff ha! Putting raised edging in, just big enough that you can’t drive over it without obviously knocking it over.

@cacaca yes if I had posted the other way around I’m sure the responses would have been entirely different. Maybe I’ll paint the neighbours house wall, as it faces me, they can’t see it and I have to look at it and you know I’m doing them a favour protecting it.