Please tell me the good things about having a baby

[roarfeckingroar]

I'm 16 weeks pregnant and overall very excited, but I'm a bit overwhelmed by how hard / expensive / exhausting it will be and how my current easy life is over.

Please would you share great things about having a baby / child? I really want the excitement to overpower the fear if possible.

Thank you in advance .

When they get older, they are also frustrating younger versions of yourself - if you were a stubborn child, seeing the same traits reflected in your own child can drive you crazy, but it's also fascinating. DS is the best of both me and DH, we created a whole special person who is a random mix of us both. When he was little I couldn't believe how lucky we were to have such a brilliant little housemate.

Oh @roarfeckingroar 😔 I feel exactly the same. Sending you a hug x

When they smile at you, hold on to you and love you unconditionally. You feel an overwhelming sense to protect something so vulnerable and wanting of your love.
Experiencing things for the first time with them.

My baby isn't biologically mine as I foster but...His little face lights up when I bend over to pick him up. His laugh melts my heart. Even when I talk nonsense to him he thinks I am funny. He calms when I pick him up. His coos when he's trying to get my attention at 3 o'clock in the morning. The way he holds my finger when I am feeding him. Everything really. I think I am treasuring this more than I did with my own two because I am so privileged to be able to be able to foster, I am calmer, more laid back than I was as a mum to my birth children and I have the hindsight of knowing from my own kids that if you do your best you are doing OK and they will forgive you most things.

Some days are long and tiring, but after she's gone to bed, I miss her. She giggles a lot and screws her nose up when she thinks somethings weird. The fears you have are real and practical, but you'll all find your feet, a new normal.

Just the way they need you and look up to you. Complete adoration! Never knew love like that existed.

This might sound cringy!!
but I now know what my purpose is in life, why I am here, to be a Mum to my little boy. He is my greatest achievement in life and brings me an immense amount of joy.
And I'm not a maternal type at all!!

Loads in fact almost everything. People love to tell you how hard it is but forget the fab stuff. Just being a mum is ace.
I'm all done now but I'm still a bit sad about doing the whole birth and baby bit again. I have four and two step children so six in total ranging from 26 to 5. I love it.

I really enjoyed playing with trains, learning about steam trains, model train fairs and days out with thomas.

Oh and if you do a smelly or loud fart you can blame the kid

I never felt the 'rush of love' for mine (many don't) but that first smile... I hate to misuse the word literally, but my mind was literally blown it was hallucinatory and marvellous. And when they start laughing you'll spend all day doing ridiculous things to make it happen again. Better than drugs.

I have a 13 month old and 18 weeks pregnant with my second

Their first laugh (when. You make them laugh)
When they hug you for the first time
When they say mama

The good times definitely outweigh the hard times, and there will be hard times! But you get over them, usually due to being exhausted and realise it goes so fast.
The pride you feel is crazy and you think your baby is the smartest, cutest thing compared to everyone's else's baby

I suggest stop reading all the threads on here about how shit it's going to be. I couldn't stop reading them and got so depressed, thought I had ruined my life for sure. I was totally wrong, it's great, lots of fun, and I went on to have another. In fact I wish I could keep going but two is a sensible amount.

It is not as hard as everyone says.

The first time you do anything with them is hard, eg first time you go on holiday, first time you take them out in the carrier, first time you give them a bath alone, then it becomes normal.

People love to piss and moan about how awful it is and it's just not. If it was, they wouldn't keep having children.

Best thing is when they smile at you as soon as they see you and when they fall asleep in your arms. Total innocent trust and love.

Also the crazy look in their eyes when they know they're about to get fed, so funny and cute.

When they develop and progress, it's amazing. Every day they learn new things and you can see they're so pleased with themselves.

"Because these amazing human beings are generally only amazing to their parents."

This is such a sad way to look at them. Little babies ARE amazing. All of them.

It IS exhausting and can be overwhelming at times, but it’s all worth it - a bit like a big night out . The fun parts and the love totally outweigh the hard part (disclaimer - most of the time. Obvs some new mums struggle with PND and that’s you, make sure to get the help you need to start enjoying things).

Newborns don’t need to be expensive - their needs are really very simple. I had a posh expensive pushchair and wooden cot etc but my DCs preferred to be carried in the sling and sleeping ON me or in with me in bed. If you breastfeed their food is free so it’s just nappies and clothes really for the first few months.

My DCs are all teens now and I’d go back and have a newborn in a heartbeat. I’m not maternal in the least, but the newborn stage is actually my favourite! Toddlers are also adorable but much harder work

I also never felt the rush of love and my baby smells of nothing. His hands smell kind of grim from being sucked all day or balled up into fists though.

I wash him daily. He just doesn't have a particular smell that I notice being particularly awesome.

*and IF that’s you

It’s really very lovely. Some of the sweetest moments I remember.

I had a tough day today. Then my 3 year old came up and gave me a hug and said "you're the best mum" and nothing else mattered.

The first time you hear “I love you Mummy”.
When your gestures of affection (a head rub, a cuddle, a hand squeeze) are returned to you by a chubby little toddler hand.
How funny they are and how unbelievably much you love them.

I love how my toddler stares into my eyes, gently pulls my face towards him, closes his eyes and slowly kisses me on the cheek or the nose. It's the best thing ever.

I also never felt the rush of love and my baby smells of nothing. His hands smell kind of grim from being sucked all day or balled up into fists though.

I agree with this - I never loved the smell of my baby’s head etc especially when they had cradle cap it just smelt a bit greasy! And their hands smell of dribble and cheesy milk when they’ve been sucking them! However, nuzzling DS’s fuzzy neck was my favourite thing! Not for the smell, but just the softness of his skin - he was a chubby little bubba, and the creases in his little legs and arms would always make me smile!

The warm cuddles they give when they are tired and go all heavy on your shoulder is just the best. And baby belly laughs, like the proper falling over with laughter ones over the silliest little things.

Everything everyone already said!

The love is truly indescribable.

Agree with previous posters, you wake up for a night feed so tired you can hardly keep your eyes open, then you see the babies gorgeous face or cute little hand and your heart will melt.
I have a 10 month old now. The first 3 months were REALLY hard, he was a really hungry baby and also had colic so would cry from 5 til 8 every evening. My life was practically a daze but it didn't matter as long as I did the best I could for the baby.
When he was 3 months he started sleeping through the night (9 til 7) which helped me to get back on track. When I went back to work at 6 months he was (and still is) sleeping 6 til 6.
(My first slept 7 hour blocks at night from 5 weeks old).
Baby is 10 months old now and he is just the best. I love seeing his personality come out, and his cheekiness, his laugh, his smiles, putting his arms up to me when he wants me, calling mama when he wants me.
With my older ds what I love is that he loves me unconditionally and always runs to greet me with open arms and love when I get home.