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Any introverts out there appreciate this time?

148 replies

slartibartfastsbeard · 08/04/2020 23:37

I'm just enjoying the chance to be at home and not feel exhausted all the time by social interaction. I'm reading but not responding to group chats about having a big get together once this is all over. I'm just relishing the fact that I can now, unashamedly, stay at home for days on end with a good book or box set and not have to deal with the draining effect of social interaction. That's not to say being at home 24/7 with DH and two teenage boys is a bed of roses, and DH being furloughed on basic wage plus a drop in income for me is extremely worrying, but I find I'm more able to deal with the important things now that I don't have to have other people filling my head.

Any other introverts out there feel similar?

OP posts:
PutThemInTheIronMaiden · 12/04/2020 07:50

Inside my bubble it’s Utopia.

Notverybright · 12/04/2020 08:34

I'm sorry I just can't see how anyone can describe this as bliss or find joy in extroverts being uncomfortable

I don't think anybody said they are happy that other people feel uncomfortable? I haven't read through the whole thread to check.
I think the whole introvert/extrovert thing is a bit of a red herring to be perfectly honest, it's like Type A and Type B and all those other personality things- people are far more complex than that.

I'm trying to find positives in a bizarre situation and thinking that I'm glad that a lot of the things that make me very nervous/uncomfortable are cancelled at the moment. I'm not proud of not being a people person. I'm quite ashamed that I can't seem to woman up and get on Facebook etc like everybody else. Though granted I do see a lot of people who seem to take pride in introversion on comments sections and Twitter etc (not on this thread though).

Also, most posters have said that they are upset about others being ill and dying. Some are volunteering too, I'm sure. I'm in sole charge of my 2 young DC, (dp is nhs) whom I don't think I could take with me to volunteer as they are too young remember to keep away from people. I am giving to charity though.

user1497207191 · 12/04/2020 08:48

I'm sorry I just can't see how anyone can describe this as bliss or find joy in extroverts being uncomfortable

I think it's an antedote for all the introverts who've suffered for years due to bullying/criticism/pressure from the extroverts.

crankysaurus · 12/04/2020 09:36

I notice how no one seems to mention volunteering or helping other people

Being able to enjoy time spent in our own company doesn't preclude us from helping others. I'm checking in with and supporting colleagues throughout the week, and getting the shopping for several down our road. Add to that two children, one with ADHD. Moments of doing very little, in silence, alone, following that are blissful.

JoysOfString · 12/04/2020 09:51

I’m very introverted and I’m enjoying a lot about it, apart from not being alone as much as before. But I have organised the support contact system for my block of flats and shopped for neighbours. As I work from home anyway I’ve always taken in parcels and done block admin. Like a pp I wouldn’t have mentioned that if people weren’t being accused of not mentioning volunteering. Not mentioning it doesn’t mean introverts aren’t doing it. Maybe they’re not doing it publicly and talking about it all the time - because they don’t like attention.

Also I am sorry for extroverts, even my ex, even though he’s not my favourite person, because I can see how hard it is for him and so I’ve agreed a system where he now sees the kids daily as it’s the only personal contact he can have. My dd is also very extrovert and spends most of the day online chatting to friends.

If there’s any gloating it’s probably because the world is normally not set up for us and we get made to feel weird by extroverts. Now, extroverts can find out what it’s like when the world is not set up for them. But I think it’s mostly tongue-in-cheek and actually I hope it just leads to more understanding, not divisions.

SignOnTheWindow · 12/04/2020 09:57

As an extravert child of a deeply introverted mother I know from this thread that many children are growing up in the same sea of hostility to them not being silent/asleep/anywhere else*

@SonEtLumiere I really do worry about my youngest DD who is a huge (and lovely) extrovert living with 3 introverts. It sounds like you had a hard time of it - do you have any words of advice/things to avoid besides the obvious ones (e.g. not spending all the time telling her to pipe down)?

SignOnTheWindow · 12/04/2020 09:58

oops, bold fail there...

Lweji · 12/04/2020 10:04

I'm not a complete introvert, but I love staying at home. And I enjoy very much interaction with friends and family but in small doses.

So, I'm enjoying this time at home. I interact on my own time via social media or messages. Don't use the phone much.

I feel for those stuck at home who are finding it difficult, but I'm not at all.

The other day someone asked what was the first thing I'd do once lockdown is over and my first thought was nothing.

It was quite hard not hugging my nephew the other day he came to the door, though.

It's hard not having bf around.

I have bouts of singing out loud and dancing to music.
But overall, the peace and quiet is just lovely.

HarrietTheShy · 12/04/2020 10:37

I'm a big time introvert. I'm loving the removal of pressure to socialise. To be out DOING SOMETHING. Don't get me wrong, I'm well-travelled and have friends all over the world, but I do it on my own terms, in my own time.

On the downside, I've been inside for over 4 weeks now (caught Covid almost immediately) and it's getting to me. Selfish neighbours appear to be in competition for who can be the shittiest human of all time. You know, the same ones posting about 'being kind' in the local FB groups.

sanityisamyth · 12/04/2020 12:31

Not an introvert as such but have social anxiety. Not finding it any different to normal as never
Have friends or family to come and see me. I've lived in this flat (totally new area) for a year now and never had a single visitor.

Arrowfanatic · 12/04/2020 14:17

I am a homebody & enjoy being at home but I really miss my friends and my karate club. I miss the freedom of popping out to do whatever.

But not having pressure to "be out enjoying the sunshine" has been wonderful. If I want to be in the sun I can go in the garden. None of this forced family activity of bike rides and picnics etc

Lordfrontpaw · 12/04/2020 15:05

Funny how I’m still expected to do all the bloody cooking (3 meals a day) and cleaning, ordering food, tidying up, keeping an eye on DS’s studied and do my work (at home) while getting zero time to myself - I’m bloody knackered.

Helocariad · 12/04/2020 16:19

Lordfrontpaw what would happen if you stopped doing all of those things all of the time? Genuine question. Your situation sounds very unfair. Having no time to yourself must be draining (and I'm speaking as an extrovert here!). Flowers

Lordfrontpaw · 12/04/2020 16:29

I actually went on strike today (knackered after a lot of running around) and my lovely DS (unprompted) made me a cup of tea and cheese sandwich (bless him).

I’m now on strike for the rest of the day and lying on the sofa with a good book!

SonEtLumiere · 12/04/2020 16:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NarniaBanarnia · 12/04/2020 16:41

I think there’s a huge divide between the extroverts and introverts on this one. The starkest way I’ve ever seen it illustrated.

I’m an introvert and (all the stress, money worries etc aside obv) I’m really enjoying this time. I’ve realised how hugely stressful I find it dealing with eg my wider family on a general basis, my parents and siblings are quite demanding of our time and I love them but I honestly don’t miss the constant suggestions of meet-ups, the constant actual meet-ups, the plans for future meet-ups... it’s a huge source of stress, takes up loads of our weekend time and I will not be able to go back easily!

DH and DD are introverts too. It’s lucky; I imagine it’s very hard to be in need of people at this time but the three of us are delighted to be indoors in each other’s company. I’m just taking all the positives I can find in a shitty stressful situation.

RuffleCrow · 12/04/2020 16:48

I am. But i'm not a complete introvert (who is?!) In the right company, I flourish, so i do slightly resent the lack of opportunity to find those rare and special (and very, very honoured Grin) people who actually make me want to leave my house and have fun.

But i'm not missing all the people with whom i have nothing in common or those who who are purposefully unpleasant, no.

MotherForkinShirtBalls · 12/04/2020 18:53

SonEtLumiere, it sounds like you had a really tough time in your childhood. A child should never be treated like that by someone supposed to love and protect them. I'm sorry it happened to you. In defense of introverts though, that sounds more akin to emotional abuse than a personality difference. I am absolutely an introvert but I love my children - including my puppy like 8 year old - more than the very air I breathe. He knows how much I enjoy him and his company. He also knows that sometimes it's ok for me to ask him to give me 10 mins of quiet in the kitchen before he launches into a very detailed explanation -talking at me solidly - of whatever his current obsession entails. Introversion does not cancel out love.

SinisterBumFacedCat · 13/04/2020 09:36

It’s a shame this thread got killed by people coming on to attack introverts.

All it means to be an introvert is that we need a bit of time on our own to recharge. It doesn’t make us cruel parents or are happy that people are dying of this awful disease so we can stay at home. In the same way that not all extroverts put pressure on us to socialise, become obsessed with loosening us up, buy us drinks we don’t want. Some, but they are thankfully in the minority.

Lordfrontpaw · 13/04/2020 09:45

I worked for a charity for a few years - so I’m not a heartless self centred bitch. As a result I worked with addicts, homeless, sick, elderly, kids in terrible circumstances... I was also a therapist for a while.

Maybe it could be argued that the introvert has a more patient and empathic nature?

Lweji · 13/04/2020 10:03

Funnily enough, although I quite like my time alone and adults in small doses, I'm quite fond of children and have loads of time for them.

It's rather unfortunate that some parents belittle their children or don't have time for them but I don't think that has to do with being extrovert or introvert.

Ffswtf · 13/04/2020 10:38

Back to the original post, I'm enjoying being off the hamster wheel of life but I'm missing the contact with my friends and colleagues. I'm an introvert but I love my people. I think that's the case for most. Having good days and bad days. Struggling to work from home while meeting the needs of my family and feeling guilty for it. I'm grateful for a lot though, trying to remain positive but not beating myself up when I have a bad day. Thank you for this thread OP, I feel like I've found my people! As an aside I don't think being an extrovert or an introvert makes you a good or a bad parent, each has it's merits (and faults!). Being a cunt is what makes you a shit parent.

Ffswtf · 13/04/2020 10:42

Also, I'm a hugger and one of the first things I'm going to do is hug my best friends, I miss cuddles

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