And lo, the screaming in gardens has started

[Lludmilla]

Kids have been off school 1.5 days. That didn't take long, did it??

(And yes, I know this is a polarising topic on here, but today I'm really struggling to wfh due to constant screaming from kids playing in gardens. And no, I don't mean shouting or laughing or giggling, none of which I'd have a problem with... I mean full-on, top-of-the-lungs screaming.)

I get that we have to make allowances/keep things in proportion etc etc at a time like this, I really do. I also get that it's nice that we at least have some sunshine during all this, and I think it's great that kids can play in their gardens. But the SCREAMING. It's like this every single year in my street as soon as the sun dares to show its face, it gets to me and makes it hard to concentrate on work, and sometimes I need to vent even though I know I'm likely to get a pasting for it.

Surely it can't just be me?

So glad nomdefuckit isn't my neighbour sounds like there is zero parenting going on in that household!!

It's not about not giving a fuck
Allowing children to scream and about is not giving a fuck.
It's reasonable expectations of urban or suburban life
Some noise from neighbours using their garden is a reasonable expectation, some noise of children playing is a reasonable expectation.

Children screaming and shouting is not a normal or reasonable expectation. If it was then this sort of conduct would be the majority, not the minority.

Silence in the day time is not it
Nobody is asking for silence, but this sort of response would be expected from anyone saying excessive noise is appropriate.
It's a bit like people say they've got an issue with parents who allow their children to scream and run around cafes, or parents who subject the whole shop to Peppa pig on their phones/tablets, there's always a couple of posters who say "want silence then go to a library, I can't believe people have an issue with children having fun, what do you expect... I suppose everyone thinks children should just sit in silence and never speak"

The idea of appropriate noise/conduct and consideration for others escapes them because their priority is allowing their children to do what they like.

I'm in the conservatory trying to work at the moment (it's the only place I can fit a desk in for me) - and it's not kids being a problem - it's fucking power tools.

Lots of power tools today.
But looking on the bright side next door neighbour's grandkids aren't here so it looks like no screamers for us this summer

We can hear a mix of gardening, power tools and children, all within the realms of reasonable though.

It's a nice day, people are stuck at home and we've all got to muddle along.

Some people take the piss on noise levels, other people are unduly sensitive and get irritated by standard neighbour noise.

Children are cooped in, their world has changed they will will be worried but can't understand why. Sorrybi know its annoying. I hate the sound of screaming and shouting as much as anyone else. But people are in living in very tense times.

people are unduly sensitive and get irritated by standard neighbour noise.

They certainly do but that isn't what this thread is about.

Do some people really not know the difference between screeching and screaming for hours and the normal sounds of children playing, laughing etc? They are either pretty thick or selfish or maybe both.

I find myself hoping for rain with the girl next door. I feel like screaming myself after listening to her for hours. Last summer I had a bad headache for days on end. I suffer from migraines and laying in bed throwing up and feeling like death her screams are the last thing I want to hear.

My dogs are not barkers but I feel like playing a recording of a barking dog and playing it full blast for hours on end. Wonder if they would complain? They have a yappy dog too (I find yapping worse than proper barking) and they do tell him to stop but he never takes any notice. Still better than Miss Screech though

They are either pretty thick or selfish or maybe both.

This. Idiot parents who will raise hideous children.

Next doors kids started screaming in the garden the day that schools closed, and they’ve pretty much been outside 24/7 since. It really bugs me especially since I make such an effort to keep dd quiet. If she is outside in the garden she is told not to scream and shout “because of the neighbours” but nd blatantly doesn’t care.

Her kids are climbing on the fence, running into my garden and causing a nuisance, so I can’t even let dd play outside because they won’t be more than 2m away.
Even when they’re inside all I hear is banging, crashing, screaming, shouting from 5am every morning.

Currently saving up for a detached house in the countryside

Or, you could stick up for your DD, @Chinks123

Why don't people do that anymore? They're more bothered about appearances then their own kids

Speak to your neighbours and tell them to stay out of your garden.

It's the footballs against fences here and the continual barking of dogs, currently driving me loopy.

Very grateful for the people over the road keeping their kids in as they're usually out screaming and kicking balls into the gardens and cars.

@nomdefuckit it’s nothing to do with appearances? Where did I state I was more bothered about how I came across than my own dd? I couldn’t care less what she thinks of me, I meant I keep her quiet for our other neighbours. The elderly on the other side, the nice man across the road etc.

I’ve tried to have a word with her about keeping them out of the garden, she got very argumentative and came close for an argument. I don’t want her near me at the moment as ds is high risk, so I’d rather keep inside than interact when we’re supposed to be distancing.

sorry to hear this Ludmilla and Chinks. TBH there's nothing you can do about this, apart from waiting for them to leave home, or move.

You have my sympathy though

thank you @SecondaryBurnzzz we own our house and they rent so fingers crossed it won’t be forever.

If you love his screaming so much nom keep that special gift all to yourself indoors.

If don't want to live with normal family noise, move to an isolated farm.

A child screaming isn’t normal family noise. If you want to let your child do exactly as it pleases with no consideration for anyone else perhaps it should be you that moves to the farm.

@SwimForBrighterDays
I feel for you. I really do. You know your ds is doing this because he is distressed. Please don't include your home in the annoying screaming children. I used to dread bumping into the neighbours, but they were really, really understanding. They see you trying your best.

People in your circumstances are why I hate the attitude of oh it must be such and such that we have seen in this thread. When the majority of parents whose children have a disability of some type, will be at home. Windows locked, desperately trying to find out what is wrong, whilst trying to retain your own sanity.

Your child isn't running around outside screaming at the tops of his lungs all day, he would be supervised for starters!! Even if he is running around in your garden, we both know it wouldn't be for hours on end. And because you don't want to inflict this on your neighbours, unlike the feckless you would take him in.

Once his new routine is settled, hopefully, he will return to his usual screams, although as he ages and his voice deepens, the random ones if he has them, will get easier on the ears. Hopefully, his school were able to provide some social stories relevant to what's going on at the moment.

I don't know if you are wfh. It doesn't matter. I'm just thinking how fucking difficult it must be. Trying to work from home, you are trying to maintain a routine to reduce the screams. Windows locked up to try and contain the noise. All whilst listening to neighbours kids outside screaming their heads off, because they are stressed, parents working etc. What about your stress? If an adult went outside and started screaming at the top of their lungs they would be told to shut the fuck up within minutes. Instead quieter ways are taught to deal with stress.

Change scream to kids shouting at the top of their lungs, fuck off all day. What was that again, too busy, they are stressed etc.

An isolated farm or bothy sounds perfect. Unfortunately we can’t all afford that so a little consideration might be nice.

Trust me, if I won the euromillions, I’d have my own island.

Iv just brought my two in as one was 'strangling' the other, and there was some screeching going on, both sat in time out. It is not acceptable to disturb other people's enjoyment of their own spaces. Nobody enjoys screeching. When they have had some time inside, and they can promice me there will be no more roughness and screeching, they can go back outside. They are learning respect.

If don't want to live with normal family noise, move to an isolated farm.

Why should it be down to other people to find the solution? It doesn't stop the behaviour. By ignoring, the feckless are reinforcing that it's fine to carry on and their children are. We hear them all day long. 8 and 9-year-olds with no additional needs (not assumed, screamer parents love telling their life story). Although thankfully at the moment, they have the sense to keep their 'angels' in.

When I was a child, every single one of us was taught to never scream unless your were in terrible danger.

We had 'The Boy who cried Wolf' story drummed into us over and over again, and told that screaming must only ever be a last resort to be used to scream for help.

We did the same. We have 5; 3 of them with ASD/ADHD. They were not allowed to scream. You can play without screaming.

If don't want to live with normal family noise - unless you live next to the Manson Family, I don't think screaming and shrieking counts as 'normal' family noise.

nomdefuckit

It's reasonable expectations of urban or suburban life

Yes & most reasonable people tell their toddler or child not to make lots of noise.

Kids are supposed to make a racket in their own gardens.

If you don't like it, move somewhere other than a family area. I live in 30's semi surrounded by 30's semis

During the day there is lots of DIY and gardening tools (retired), balls being kicked on fences and chasey games in the street (shrieking from older kids), occasional music coming from windows or gardens (teenagers) and some giggling and occasional shrieks from gardens (younger kids)

That's family life in a family area. That's the actual community.

If this is intolerable to anyone, I'd suggest a bungalow, apartment block, retirement village or isolated cottage would be more appropriate

There are plenty of places to live where noise is unlikely or not acceptable.

You can't live on a family estate and not expect to hear families being families.

If I moved into a retirement area and started playing noisey games in the garden, that would be different

A family estate is not one of them. Particularly not now.