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Original poster

The nastiest thing you've ever said....

56 replies

Clawdy · 21/02/2020 15:32

and can't forgive yourself for it? I've quite a few, but the worst was when my younger sister ( we were constantly having a go at each other) brought home her new best friend from school. I looked up as they came in the room, and sniggered under my breath, "Ha, I knew she'd be ugly." They ignored me and went off, but I've never forgotten it, and wondered if that little girl remembers it. Many, many years ago, but I wish I could go back and change that horrible moment.

OP posts:

Blondefancy · 21/02/2020 15:42

I had a friend who shared the same name as another girl in our school, this friend was also quite a large girl at the time. I was talking to this guy via Facebook (would have been 14?!) and I mention that I am with meeting up with “so and so” (my friend) to which he replied with which one..and I say “fat so and so”. That friend came over later and saw those messages and I saw that she got very upset over the comment but was too non-confrontational of a person to say anything. It was a horrible moment and I’ve felt guilty ever since what a mean person I was back then..

OkMaybeNot · 21/02/2020 15:46

Something sprung to mind straight away, but I'm too ashamed to even post it

CrocodileFondue · 21/02/2020 15:46

I told my parents I hated them a few times in my teens.

They weren't perfect but they tried their best and I feel awful for saying that. I have since apologised but I know I'll be crushed if/when DS says it to me when he reaches that horrible, hormonal angsty stage.

isabellerossignol · 21/02/2020 15:48

When I was a teenager I once told my mum that I hated her, on my way out to school. It's the only time in my life that I've seen her reduced to tears. She was still sitting at the kitchen table in her dressing gown in the same place when I arrived home that afternoon. I've never seen her so distraught, before or since. I'd do anything to take that back.

Waxonwaxoff0 · 21/02/2020 15:59

I called someone a "fat fuck" before (not to their face, I was being nasty about them to a friend). I was 13 I think. I still remember it now and go over it in my mind and wish I'd never said it.

Original poster

Clawdy · 21/02/2020 16:51

Sounds as if it's often as a teenager we say the worst things.

OP posts:

Woollycardi · 21/02/2020 17:06

@isabellerossignol As painful as that memory might be, looking back on it now do you believe that was the sole reason for her still sitting in her dressing gown in the same place that afternoon?

Halfcharged · 21/02/2020 17:08

I was very academic growing up, top set, straight A student. My mum wasn’t. She was so proud of me and any opportunity she had she’d praise me whilst simultaneously putting myself down eg ‘I could never have done that work at your age’ type of thing.

When I was 16 I became very very ill and after months of suffering I was diagnosed with lupus. On the way to my next clinic appointment she said ‘maybe they’ll say that you haven’t got lupus and that they’d misdiagnosed you’. She was obviously trying to be positive but after months of feeling like I was literally dying (I truly did think I was going to die) the diagnosis had felt like a relief to me (at 16 I don’t think I grasped what chronic meant and naively thought i could take a tablet and he cured) I snapped her ‘you can tell how stupid you are saying something like that’. As soon as I said it I wanted to stuff the words back in my mouth. She didn’t say anything but the look on her face said it all. I think she understood that we’d all been through an awful time and I was just lashing out but I’ll always feel bad about it especially as she’s not stupid at all!!

XelaM · 21/02/2020 17:09

Everyone on this thread seems so much nicer than me that I'm ashamed to post mine I've said mean things to my daughter (of all people!) in anger which I'm very much ashamed of. We're very close though

AmazingGreats · 21/02/2020 17:35

I've said some truly grotesque things under the influence. I don't drink anymore and everybody I come into contact with is the better for it. Sober my personal insecurity comes out as a bit people pleaser-y so I have to watch that, but two glasses into a bottle of wine I turn into a prize bitch.

Not surprised I ended up with no friends left by the time I realised that I had got the family "alcohol curse." I was vile. People say you tell the truth when your drunk. Not me, there was no truth in it I wasn't calling people out or any of that other stuff I was just being a spiteful bitch. Pleased to say that I am not that person sober. If I even think mean thoughts I tell my mind off and remind myself that we all have our own struggles and our own story, who am I to judge etc. But crack a bottle of vino open and I know no matter how many years I haven't had a drink that nasty person would take over a couple of glasses in.

MuscatelGrapes · 21/02/2020 17:39

Gosh, you lot are far nicer than me. I've said considerably more intentionally cruel things to people I felt deserved it in adulthood, entirely sober, meaning every word and I can forgive myself just fine.

isabellerossignol · 21/02/2020 17:48

@isabellerossignol As painful as that memory might be, looking back on it now do you believe that was the sole reason for her still sitting in her dressing gown in the same place that afternoon?

Yeah, to be honest I do. I had never ever seen her do anything like that before and never saw her do anything like ever again. She was like a shell of herself.

knightlight · 21/02/2020 17:50

When I was a child I told my sister she had a massive forehead out of spite as she made fun of a feature of mine during a squabble.

All these years later and she's really still self conscious about it and refers to her big forehead.

The thing is she doesn't have a big forehead, it's perfectly average and in proportion. She's much prettier than me and I said it out of jealousy. I've tried lots of times since to tell her she looks lovely but I think the damage is done!

Helini · 21/02/2020 18:12

Once my lovely brother bought me back a gift from his school trip, it was a little wallet. Anyway his friend stayed over that night who I had the biggest crush on. To make the boy laugh, I 'dissed' how crap the wallet was and how useless it was. Made the boy laugh and i felt brilliant. As soon as the boy left, my brother burst into tears and was so upset as he had bought me something with his own pocket money to make me happy.

I think about this all the time and even though we were about 10 at the time and we have now grown up and get on, I'm so ashamed of myself and often get teary thinking about it. His little face was crushed. And he kept it in the whole time and just broke down when the boy went home. My poor brother.

XktldX · 21/02/2020 18:28

I used to work somewhere when I was a teenager and my mother ended up being employed as my boss. We didn’t get on at the time because my parents were divorcing and i sided with my dad so she literally made me life hell with false accusations etc... anyway this one time she texted me from her personal number saying she was going to demote me and promote two other girls in a job share instead I was so annoyed in the heat of the moment I sent a text back saying that if she was going to employ 2 (insert swear word here) with barely any GCSEs between them then I’d just quit.

Needless to say she screenshot said messages and sent it to the girls involved and there were hurt feelings all round. They were so upset and I felt awful. It’s been over 15 years and I still think about it now and Wish I could go back! 😕

Original poster

Clawdy · 22/02/2020 14:39

So mainly teenagers.....funny how we don't forget saying them , though.

OP posts:

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 22/02/2020 15:17

After my daughter died there was this woman who kept on telling me she was going to hug her daughter a little bit tighter because I couldnt hug mine anymore, sometimes her daughter was with her and she would literally hug her in front of me, sharing her daughters achievements with me so i could have a little bit of what i lost etc. Just an acquaintance that i would bump into every now and then, but every single time she said something along these lines.

It was on my daughters birthday that I bumped into her this time, I was buying a cake (we do a cake every year for my son and daughter who died), her dd was born around the same time as mine so she would have known.

She said "oh how heartbreaking, having to buy a cake for your dd who cant appreciate it, count yourself lucky though, in a couple of weeks I have a house full of kids for my dds party, what I would give for some peace and quiet".

I think it was the years of pent up rage at her thoughtlessness that made me shout at her

"I dont count myself lucky at all, but since you do how about we swap places and you have your fucking daughter die on you so you can enjoy the peace and quiet that brings"

She burst into tears in the middle of the supermarket, I pretty much stormed off calling her a stupid bitch for good measure.

As soon as I got outside I regretted it instantly, as thoughtless as she was I guess it came from a good place?

I still havent spoken to her again and I see her semi regularly. That was 3 or 4 years ago now.

I know I should apologise, but I wont because, to be honest, my life is that bit easier without these interactions with her. I do feel bad though.

MadisonMontgomery · 22/02/2020 15:21

Difficult I don’t think you have anything to feel bad about!

SecretWitch · 22/02/2020 15:26

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult..

I’m so sorry for the loss of your daughter.💐

I also think you should not give this another moments thought. This “friend” is very insensitive and appears to have no emotional intelligence. I feel like she should be apoligising to you...

Spied · 22/02/2020 15:29

I was truly evil at times as a young adult.
Said some outrageous things to my beloved Grandparents who provided me with a loving home and security. Wish I could tell them how sorry I was
I called them names
Ridiculed their health issues
I'm too ashamed to go on. They were my world.

OkMaybeNot · 22/02/2020 15:30

@DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult jesus, she's lucky you didn't punch her in the nose. I honestly think I'd have struggled to contain my temper. You were very restrained.

She probably looks back at that conversation and dies of shame. And so she should.

SunshineDays2019 · 22/02/2020 15:35

I agree, difficult has absolutely nothing to feel bad about. I say well done you. What a thoughtless ignorant woman saying those things to you, how awful.

LondonMrsA · 22/02/2020 15:35

@XktldX You're Mums the ** not you.

Seeleyboo · 22/02/2020 15:36

I asked my best friend why did she have a picture of such an ugly woman on the wall. She said it was her dead mum. Oh shit.

LondonMrsA · 22/02/2020 15:37

@XktldX Not even English. Sorry.

Your Mum is the **. Not you.

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