Help me help my 11 yr old son lose weight

[Olliphant]

Hi

I have two boys and a girl. Eldest son is very tall and thin. Youngest daughter also. Middle son is tall - but he carried weight on his tummy and chest.

He has:
breakfast - 3 weetabix and full fat milk

Lunch - white wrap and jam
small plain yogurt with spoon jam
one fruit (apple or grapes)
some pretzels, (about 10)
water

Dinner - home cooked dinner with salad starter
glass milk (full fat)
fruit for pudding

He has maybe one white wrap for a snack
Sometimes has a crunchy bar as a snack at school
whole pizza once a week

(eg of dinners)
macaroni cheese once a week
pasta bolognese or similar once a wee
veggie curry rice
roast chicken with all trimms

He cycles to school and back (20 mins total)
Plays football once a week (usually 3 in match season)

Please help (actually even seeing it written down has helped - no more pizza)....

Just off the top of my head, and I don't mean this in a harsh way; why does he have full fat milk? And could the jam in the wrap be swapped for meat or cheese?

Thanks Choice - I thought it was healthier than skimmed but when I wrote this, I might swap to semi skimmed.

Just writing this list has helped actually!

Thanks for reply

No jam, full of sugar and no nutritional value.

Definitely more protein and good fats.

Try oats for breakfast with berries and a spoon of peanut butter/sprinkling of ground almonds. I buy bags of frozen berries for this, really good to chuck in the pan when cooking to defrost.

For lunch maybe try a tuna wrap with diced pepper/Sliced chicken breast with some sort of seasoning and salad. If he'll eat it add some avocado in there. Turkey mince burrito style in a wrap.

Evening meals sound good.

I think semi skimmed would be a good compromise. And the lunch just looked a bit sugary with jam in the wrap and on the yoghurt. He needs some protein

Just chatting to myself I think I will:
Cut milk to semi skimmed
Cut out weekly pizza
Change wrap and jam to wholemeal bread and ham
change pretzels to carrot and salad and cubes cheese
cut down carb portion in dinners and increase protein
Change weetabix to eggs once or twice a week

Tray and do park run with him if I can wake up!

Maybe a couple of boiled eggs as a snack? Homous with pittas, carrot and cucumber sticks.

I worked in an obesity service, my DS was also tubby at 11 My best tips
Water or Semi skimmed milk only to drink.
1 fun sized chocolate bar as a treat.
Jam is not a sandwich filling he needs protien.
Where's the veg ?

Portion sizes? An 11 year old does not need 3 weetabix.
Too many snacks. You need to weigh food and count calories to get an accurate picture of intake.

Swap the milk for skinned. Why 3 weetabix?

Swap the white jam wrap for a whole wrap with chicken and salad. No pretzels, they're pure salty dead calories.

What is in the evening meal? Carbs are not really necessary at night, especially white carbs.

He is one of these kids who just fusses about food, so he will not eat a filling in a wrap. He doesn't like sandwiches unless ham or jam.... I totally see I have to get rid of the jam.

Frozen berries is a great idea and he does like these heated up or even in his plain yoghurt. Thanks!

My other kids love food and like all different sorts of tastes etc. He likes carbs and milk.

3 weetabix?! Is he a weightlifter?!

A Wrap is a lunch meal, Not a snack.

Serve your meals on side plates so you wont be tempted to put too much food on a plate.

At 11 I really wouldn't worry too much, unless you have been told by health professionals he needs to lose weight. Some kids just put the pound on when they are about to go through, and during puberty. Could you perhaps be seeing it as a problem because your other 2 children are very slim?

Many toy could make a pot of chia jam with gin for the fridge if he’d eat it? That way he can still have his jam a couple of times a week, but there’s no added sugar and extra protein from the chia seeds. Lots of recipes online and it will keep in the fridge for a week.

Mostly I’d say please don’t let him get a complex about it. Handle this wrongly and you could be setting him up for a lifetime of weight related issues. I don’t mean that to sound unkind, but honestly my mother and her sisters are all so, so messed up over food/weight and it has all stemmed from childhood and 40 years of trying to exist in smaller flesh. Good luck, OP.

Argh - excuse my typos. I bloody spellchecked it too!!

Thanks for all replies.

3 weetabix - he complains two is not enough. I started giving him an apple and two weetabix - and I was thinking a two egg scramble?

I will stop the pretzels.
He will not eat fillings - I love egg tuna prawns even cheese but he will not eat that - so hard!

Ar night it is home cooked meal, but always some carbs so I can cut them down and increase the actual good bit - annoyingly he always wants more of the carb bit and less of the protein bit.

I do give him a bowl of veggies before his dinner - carrots/peppers/tomatoes and peppers to snack on

Dinners don't sound very healthy. Macaroni cheese is one of the unhealthiest meals... White carbs and a million calories! Also can't see any vegetables in his diet

Fat isn’t the problem here, it’s sugar; keep the whole milk (the vitamins are fat soluble and it’s more satisfying) but cut out all the sugary items where you can.

Any white carbs (the wraps, the pasta), the jam in wrap and yoghurt and chocolate are the issue, switch to whole meal, up the protein and good fats (dairy, nuts & seeds, olive oil) and cut out processed food and drink. When doing things like the Mac & cheese, add puréed butternut squash (tell him it’s Red Leicester if he’s fussy), add peas/spinach etc to up his veg intake. And reduce the weetabix to 2 and look at eggs as a good alternative.

Thanks for your replies - will investigate chia jam - he does like chia seed!

He has swimming this term and he is worried as he feels his tummy is big. This is what has made me post - I told him he was perfect and people are all different sizes , and I think he does feel a bit better now. But I thought I'd secretly help him lose his tum a bit.

Thanks again for suggestions, very much appreciated.

@Olliphant you know what? Let him be.

He needs at the very least 60 minutes of vigorous physical exercise every day.

I don't think his diet is that bad...my DS did hold a bit of fat in the same places at 11 and then he really shot up and lost it!! I find they putt a bit of weight on before a growth spurt. My DS is 12 now a today ate 2 hot cross buns for breakfast, A white bread roll with ham and cheese, frube, satsuma and home made chocolate brownie.... he had the same for dinner as we had Kuk Sool and then came home and ate some cheese and ham and another hit cross bun.

I don't believe you can tackle a weight problem without him knowing. I gad an overweight 11 year old and he knew. It was only when I finally sat down to talk to him about it instead of trying to surreptitiously change his diet that things got better. He knows he is overweight and you denying it can only confuse him.
Once you have hi on board you can make changes to his diet with a willing participant.
At 11 he will start a big growth spurt soon so you probably don't need to do that much, just try to get him into some healthy eating habits.

I also wouldn’t worry too much at 11, weight can come ahead of height and as he’s heading for puberty there’s a lot of growing to do. You can steer the food you give naturally into healthier options but do tread carefully. There’s nothing wrong with a chocolate bar here and there or pizza as part of a varied diet.

I’d agree with pp, don’t make it a big deal, don’t be blinded by his size compared to siblings either.

OP, I want to say that you seem like such a caring mother. But...try not to worry too much. You clearly know what you need to do now from your pps. I agree, cut down on the carbs and increase the protein and veg at dinnertimes. Also get rid of the jam and full fat milk. I know a pp has said keep the full fat milk but I would personally cut it out.

A better lunch would definitely be a wholemeal wrap with ham, plain yogurt with berries, carrot sticks and an item of fruit.

Thank you everyone! Lots of good ideas, and I will be food shopping tomorrow.

I probably am worrying a bit too much - you just want them to be happy !