What's it like to be rich?

[Hoolajerry]

Was driving home today thinking about how if I could I would get rid of my wardrobe and start again. That is not an option. Between work, 4 dc and volunteering our lives are exceptionally busy and despite having a good income we don't have the freedom to do what we like. I was just wondering if you are truly rich what is your life like? Does someone else do all your menial tasks? Kids in private schools? Lots of holidays, shopping, eating out and activities?
Anyone actually consider themselves to be rich or is it all relative and we all actually have constraints on our daily lives that aren't actually connected to money?
Just wondering....

When it’s good, it’s great. When it’s bad, the shit hits the fan and you wish you’d never had lived that lifestyle.

The dream was utterly fantastic & beyond comprehension when things were good for them. But when things turned bad, the nightmare was just that - a real nightmare.

I say this as a previous employee who worked in the UAE, Beverley Hills and all over for private families over a 20 year period. I had to sign Confidentiality Agreements and for 2 placements I wasn’t even permitted to tell my own friends or family who I was working for.

That extreme wealth of retina security at electric-gate roadside and then electronic fingerprint check once through the gates, ID check at Security then a bag search and more checks at ‘Tradesman entrance’ made me appreciate my freedom....& you cannot put a price on that.

Manners and kindness cannot be bought.

I think it’s relative. I’m sure a lot of people think we’re rich but if we stopped working it would all collapse on our heads. We’re working towards financial freedom but until we can decide to whatever and not be left homeless as a result I wouldn’t call us rich.

I know a member of a very rich family. His dad made his money in computers. He was so busy with his business he wasn't around for his kids. The (now) adult children have mostly lead aimless lives, waiting for their trust funds to kick in. Imagine never working. Not bothering with school, literally never accomplishing anything to be proud of. He's very bitter about it now because no one pushed him to do anything.

He lives in a stunning mansion, has multiple cars, family private jet, vacations constantly... and literally has nothing interesting to say about anything.

Interestingly, the grandchildren have been pushed to be the best at everything - school, sports, arts. As they reach adulthood, it's going to be interesting to see how they do in life vs. their parents who were left to their own devices.

That’s what you can do when you have a nippy little car!”. So he rammed his massive 4x4 into her car repeatedly and absolutely destroyed it. Then said “That’s what you can do when you’re a fucking multi millionaire, here are my insurance details
no he didn't. It's a line from a film ( fried green tomatoes maybe?)

I'm 'rich'/ My parents worked hard and are rich so I had a wonderful childhood, lovely holidays etc. Had a tutor that got me into a Grammar school. Went to university. They bought me my car. Have tens of thousands in ISAs, stocks and shares and saving accounts. Bought me my house.

It's meant I'm 'rich' because I don't have to pay rent/mortage/car fees.

It's nice not having to worry about money. And they've done a great job of making sure me and my sisters aren't spoilt etc. i'm incredibly lucky.

But I'm single and all I want is a family. So I'm not rich in that sense.

I know people say money can't buy happiness, but I just feel sometimes that, actually, money truly IS the root of a lot of our problems at the minute.

Things need to be done to the house, we can't afford to go on holiday, I'm actually wondering how I'm going to fuel my car up when it needs it next.

I know we're luckier than a lot of people, and I'm not saying I want to be a billionaire and live in a mansion or anything like that. 100k to do the house up, pay off the mortgage and put a bit in our savings to fall back on during quiet times (we're both self employed) would honestly change our lives completely.

I would love to be able to afford to go to the dentist, to go and see a chiropodist.
When your out not have to avoid the ice cream stand with the kids, or buy a drink when your out as your thirsty, or just fancy a sit down and cake in that nice coffee shop.
I look at some peoples shopping and think, thats a really good shop thats what i would buy if i could afford it. Berries and fruit, lunches and dinners.
Being able to take the children places to expand what they are learning at school, or extra curricular clubs and experiences.
It feels a different world.

Have to agree with PP about 4 kids making you not rich. We are not rich but stopped at 1 child because any more than that would be a real financial struggle.
Would love to understand people's reasoning for having lots of kids despite not necessarily being able to comfortably afford it.

You don't have to have a lot of money to be rich, you can be rich in many ways.
Freedom is far better than money, time to live as you please and not have to work for someone else.
We consider ourselves to be richer than we ever imagined, but we only have one little income.
We aren't consumerist though, so tend not to need to buy things for the sake.
My new wardrobe is coming from second hand shops, ebay, or cheaper high street shops like Primark.
This way we get to still feel rich, if we spent it on expensive/ designer shops we'd be unhappy, losing our feeling of being rich.

My parents worked hard and are rich so I had a wonderful childhood

There is absolutely no correlation between any of the statements in this sentence. Hard work is frequently entirely unrelated to income, and there is zero relationship between parental income and whether or not they're decent parents.

My DC attends a school where a large proportion of the other families are rich. I'm sure that when life is going well, it's great being rich. However, just thinking of a small sample of the mums I know from the school gate, one very sadly had a stillbirth recently. Another is getting divorced because her husband had an affair. Sadly, sometimes difficult things happen in life whether you are wearing designer clothes or have bought your jeans from Sainsburys (as I have!).

We aren’t “rich” but I think would be compared to some MNers / some of the population.

We were discussing it the other day and the best thing is that we have no worries about money. I know that seems really obvious, not we can buy whatever we want, go wherever we want, basically don’t have the stress or constraints of budgets.

We feel very very lucky to be in this position but aren’t swimming in diamonds and wearing finest furs, we are relatively normal people just with a slightly bigger house and some nice holidays.

What's rich? I can eat out every night, holiday 2-3 times a year, renew my wardrobe most years etc but it's not like the really rich (my clothes are from the high Street not designers, I don't go to restaurants with stars often!)

My sister and husband are wealthy. Both on 6 figures and mortgage free. However the salary comes at a price and they are both beholden to the companies they work for.

I earn a lot but don't consider myself rich as I know a lot of people who have inherited lots of money. And my husband and I won't inherit anything

We can pay for the children's education & have good savings, nice holidays, buy whatever clothes I like though

We don't have a big house though, and no longer have a nanny and only 1 house has a cleaner (we do have 2, neither big)

Would love to understand people's reasoning for having lots of kids despite not necessarily being able to comfortably afford it.
leadbetter5 who are you to judge whether we can comfortably afford 4 dc and why we would choose to have them? I had a large family because as one of two with a large age gap between I was very lonely growing up. However my choice is in no way a reflection of other's choices. We can comfortably afford 4 children but everyone's definition of comfortable is different. We are bot rich though and my initial OP was the result of me pondering the difference being truly rich would make to our lives.

There are many different levels of richness. Private planes, multi million houses in different places, £50 million - I think of jewellery the cleaner stole (Eccelstone). Or just nice paid for house, servants, children in private school rich?

I don't think we could afford 4 dc as in not have the same level of lifestyle that we do now. However I don't buy into the popular on MNs theory that you can't afford a dc unless you can afford private schooling, university, car, house deposit, etc for them.

I think "rich" is a relative idea. I was born and brought up in a poor working class environment. I was the child of a one person family.

I'm now retired and have a pretty good pension. I have paid off my mortgage, have very little debt. I holiday for 7 weeks a year. I rarely have to think about what I buy, within reason. No boats or second houses, but then, I don't want them.

"rich"to to me means not worrying what will happen when I use the ATM, or use my card in a shop. I always know I have the funds.

That's rich enough for me

@user764329056

I don’t agree with a previous poster saying ‘almost everything can be alleviated with money’, money doesn’t buy manners, humility, kindness or any of the truly important things in life - the only condition money treats is materialism

I maintain money makes most things better. That’s why I said “alleviate” and not “buy”. Two entirely different concepts. You can be a mannerless arsehole, but that probably only causes others to suffer.

For those who see travelling First Class as a signifier of success, may I tell you that it is extremely overrated. You are in a tiny cabin - alone - and it is very boring

It’s certainly not worth paying for as a luxury but it’s definitely preferable to flying in the other classes which are no less boring and far less comfortable.

That’s what you can do when you have a nippy little car!”. So he rammed his massive 4x4 into her car repeatedly and absolutely destroyed it. Then said “That’s what you can do when you’re a fucking multi millionaire, here are my insurance details”.
What a horrible man, money doesn’t buy manners!

I am friends with a mega-wealthy family (a man and his two sons). Although they like their toys (boat & car mad) the main eye-opening difference is the amount of services they buy in. And how much normal life stress that alleviates. Basically all of it!

A housekeeper who cooks 3 gourmet meals a day and cleans/shops/organises all repairs. People to manage all the toys (storing them, cleaning them, stocking them, etc). Someone else to organise all travel details. Tutors for everything- the best in their fields, actual university professors with international awards.

Amusingly, they love when I drop by with some homemade hummus or invite them to a school event (not a fancy school!). They are as wide-eyed as I am at their lifestyle!

Much as I sometimes envy the carefree way they live their daily lives with no ‘wife work’, there’d be lots of services they buy in that I never would. No one gets to pack my suitcase but me, and if I’m having people over I’ll do the cooking, thanks. Chef can do the prep and washing up, though.

Oh wait, the best thing about being mega-rich is having access to experts. Are you into watercolour painting? Get lessons from your fave artist. Wondering about creating a good wine cellar? Get the sommelier from your fave 3 star restaurant over to give you a hand. Into marine biology? Hop a ride with a research team on their whiz bang mini sub.

Now THAT is more important to me than all the designer gear in the world!

We debated many times about flying first with children and I just don't think it's very practical. Not when they are little, you can't see them to keep an eye on them. I find business class much better, separate but still close enough to pop your head over.