Out of control house - where do I start?

[Ninjakittysmellz]

I am embarrassed and overwhelmed so please don’t shout at me - I want to make it better.

I’m a single parent, and I’m overwhelmed at the moment working 2 jobs and just about keeping on top of life. We eat out to avoid using the kitchen as I can’t face cleaning it. I’ve bought ds new socks and pants because my laundry is out of control. It’s not fair on either of us and I have to tackle it....

Where do I start? Upstairs? The kitchen? Do I do Laundry first? I can’t dry it because if I put it on radiators the pet hair hasn’t been hoovered.

I am embarrassed, but I don’t know where to start to make this better. There are 3 beds and a bathroom upstairs, clothes on landing in piles of both clean and dirty. We only use my bedroom really but the spare room has clothes piled up on the bed and floor. Ds room is immaculate but hasn’t been hoovered or dusted.

Downstairs there is a playroom (not too bad) living room, kitchen / diner (a hell hole) and utility with clean / dirty laundry in and all the cat food and litter in.

Please tell me where to begin - once I’ve blitzed it I’m getting a cleaner because I never want to be in this position again. It’s really not fair on ds and I dread coming home :(

Great job 😍

I’m going back in..... the cat hair is indeed my nemesis. Shaving the grumpy sods seems extreme, yet reasonable.....

I used laundry baskets. One at bottom of stair for stuff to go up, one at top for stuff to go down. Was carrying up and down for years never went up or down empty handed.

Once you have done the kitchen try and put all the clean clothes in your son's room away. Try not to leave them there as you said that room is pretty good and it sounds like your kitchen nearly is so by the end of today that will be two rooms sorted. Keep going!

My DH (in charge of housework) gets overwhelmed by the laundry. So I have taken some control and take the hard to dry stuff - duvet covers, towels, sweats - into a big bag and take it to the laundry for them to do. Then all that needs to be done is me to pick up, take home and hand to him to put away.

And remember neither Queen Liz nor any of her family are about to visit. Life doesn't need to be pristine.

One laundry tip from someone who has struggled - for every load you put on, put one away (I specify a load as 25-40 items). I find if I’m not careful I just end up with another mountain of clothes that are clean. So now when I put a load on I iron/fold and then put away clothes somewhere else in the house. It has really helped the backlog.

When my house gets into a state the bin bags come out. Not unheard of for us to go the dump 2/3 times during a big clear out.

Don't be hard on yourself, you've got a lot on! I try and tackle as much as I can whilst listening to music, so the end of each song is like a mini deadline.
Give yourself longer term goals, for example, by this time next week, I'll be on top of laundry or whatever.
Break it all into chunks, so each part is manageable.

You are doing great! I was going to suggest start with a list and a timer.

Getting things crossed off my list is so motivating and satisfying.

Also, if things are really chaotic I will create “one small space” . That’s a spot I pick that I make absolutely perfect. Something as simple as a corner on the counter in the kitchen, perfectly clean and I put a candle or something decorative in it. When I get stressed I look at that space and calms me; it helps me to keep working.

From now on save every £2 coin you get and shove it in a jar rather than spend it. And google/find your nearest launderette that does a service wash. Then, if you ever have an overload of dirty laundry again you can grab your £2 (which build up surprisingly quickly) and take an big blue ikea bag of washing for someone else to wash, dry and fold.

We do this now every year after our holidays. Yes it costs about £30 but it saves the dreaded washing mountain and helps the holiday feeling last a few more hours.

I would clean out the cat litter tray first. Then clean kitchen sink and wash enough dishes so that you can cook something at home. Take ds to the shops and buy yourselves a treat from M&S , that will be cheaper than eating out. Also order a clothes airer from Amazon or buy one while you're out at the shops today if you have a car. Do you have enough cleaning stuff? Washing up liquid, sponges, j cloths, loo cleaner and spray cleaner for the bathroom, bin liners - that's all you need to make a start. Leave the laundry until tomorrow.

I can report back.... kitchen is done!!! I’m insanely chuffed!

I need to hang out laundry and then I’m going to tackle clean laundry upstairs as I think you all have a point about the build up, and I’m loathe to mess up Ds room.

Ds is lying on the floor in the living room so working around him whilst he’s happy to be abandoned!

@ChicChicChicChiclana I am embarrassingly well equipped for cleaning supplies.... when I’m lying in bed at night thinking tomorrow really is the day I’m going to get my shot together, I order supplies off amazon..... this is embarrassingly the first time I’ve actually got off my arse and done the second part of using them though

You're doing so well - keep at it!
If you need something to keep on top of cat hair on the floor going forward, I seriously recommend investing in a robot hoover. We got a Eufy off Amazon in the post xmas sales and its amazingly efficient!

So so impressed that you’ve actually made a start. It’s too easy to put off to tomorrow what really needs doing today. Quietly cheering you on! You can do this...

Well done - you’ve motivated me to put away more laundry and hoover my bedroom before I come back to check on your progress again!

Wow, you've achieved so much from what must have felt insurmountable at the start of the day! Good luck with upstairs

Sounds like you've made a big difference today, and it's not even 3 pm yet!
You've had some great tips here.
It strikes me that laundry is,a big issue, and you've mentioned drying things on radiators, which is problematic because of cat hair. Someone has already suggested using a laundrette, which is a great idea, but can I also suggest an old fashioned kitchen maid to hang laundry from? I've put ours in the hall upstairs, so it's out of the way, and benefits from heat rising. We don't have pets, but for you it would keep the clean washing out of the way of the cat.
And keep bedroom doors shut, to keep the cat out.

Traditional 4 Lath Pulley Kitchen Maid Clothes Airer Indoor Drying
£24.99
eBay

Oooh I will look at that @ohhgreat thank you!

I have a slight motivating factor in that I am having some work done to the house on Thursday and I will need to be able to let the workmen into every room in the house. The thought of that is keeping me going or I’m not sure I would have the impetus to of started (as is proven by fact I’ve put it off so much in past!) I just want this to be a clean slate though - a fresh start. If I can get a fortnightly cleaner to keep on top of things too i might stand a chance of keeping on top of things. Fingers crossed anyway!

You've done the hardest part which is breaking the back of it. Once you've done that the enjoyment of seeing a big difference sort of spurs you on to keep going. That,.and the realisation that you CAN do it because, look, here it is happening in front of you!

This has proved indispensable in my ongoing battle against cat hair www.wilko.com/en-uk/jml-wonderbroom/p/0438820

@ninjakittysmells it sounds like you've gotten loads done already- that feeling of not knowing where to start is the worst. I take it that you live somewhere with no dryer/easy place to dry stuff? They may not work in your area but I am in a similar situation and use an app called Laundrapp- they collect bags of laundry from your door and drop it back 2 days later washed, dried and folded (although not ironed). They wash everything at 30 and dry it at 30, and will charge extra for items like towels/tea towels/sheets but if you hand them a bag of general laundry that can be dried in a dryer at 30 degrees then you are flying. It has changed my life- i was in a constant cycle of laundry hanging on every available surface, clean laundry piled up on chairs and dirty laundry piled up in and next to basket- I never managed to get on top of it and genuinely it was one of my biggest stresses at home and now I spend about 20-25£ every 2 weeks and never worry about laundry at all!!

Well done! You’re doing brilliantly!

Well done OP! The hardest part is just making a start - somewhere, but you sound well-motivated now you can see your hard work paying off.