People who got broody and wanted a late extra child and actually did it, do you regret it?

[Apocketfulofposies]

I have three and the youngest is about to go to school. Having the third nearly broke us - financially, emotionally, physically, matrimonially - and I can't believe we have got this far in one piece and soon all three will be in primary school. I am early 40s and even having the last one towards the end of my thirties was so much harder than the first at the beginning of my thirties, so I am not really being serious, and yet... that niggling feeling persists. Presumably this feeling will persist however many I have when the youngest stopped being a baby. But did anyone actually do it? And was it a terrible mistake? Talk some sense into me please!

I’m not much help. I was 40 in December and I am 8 weeks pregnant with my 3rd. My Youngest is 7. I had an overwhelming now or never feeling. Even though I hate pregnancy and birth.

I'm really keen to see what people say as I'm late 30s & debating a third.
@ODFOkaren you've said how ridicule having a third was in your late 30s. I take it u don't regret it?

Sorry wrong tag. That was meant for @pocket

I don’t regret falling pregnant with my 3rd if that’s what you mean? I was 33 and 22 in my last pregnancies. 33 was harder than 22, so I’m under no Illusions that this will be harder at 40.

The feeling will go. It's just your body knowing you're almost past your fertile years and upping the anti to try to trick you into it.
Don't do it. Especially in your circumstances. And I say that as a 42 year old with a toddler.

@Fifteenthnamechange ah, no worries! Crossed posts!

No one is ever going to say they regretted having their child.

Catsick36 maybe if more people did there wouldn't be so many people just having kids for the sake of it rather than thinking about what kind of life they can offer a child.

Would I make the same decision again? Not sure.
Adore my 3rd but I am 51, with a year 7. So years ahead of term time hols. House choice contained by school. And I started all of that in 1995 when I had my oldest. Tbf it took us longer to have no.3 than we planned .

I had a 8 and 10 year old when I had my third at 38. But I / we decided we didn't want him to be lonely. So I had my 4th at 40. Loved every minute of it then. But now I am nearly 50 it is getting harder and DH is older than me too.
I love them and wouldn't change a thing but be aware it's hard.

People do say that they regret having a child, it seems almost taboo on MN not to sometimes.

I’m 40 this year and hoping for a child.

"No one is ever going to say they regretted having their child"

A quick search of the topic would suggest otherwise.

I had children numbers 5 and 6 at age 40 and 42 and I love it! Pregnancies and births a bit more hassle but having two small children running around again is beautiful.

We decided to try for no.4 when I was 41. Twins were born when I was 42!!

Bit of a shocker at the time but never a regret

Had my last 2 at 40 and 43, wouldn't be without them, but was physically and emotionally hard, bit easier now they're teenagers,

Had dc2 at 30 and dc3 at 40. She’s adorable and I’m so glad.

Why ask parents and not the kids? I was a later life baby.... If I had the choice I think I'd rather not have been. I love my parents but don't think it's a good idea. In my experience.

My older two were 18 and 14 when my third was born - I was 41. He wasn’t an accident he was very much planned and wanted. I have loved doing it all again, and in a lot of ways it’s like having an only child. But I’m 52 this year with an 11 year old child and I will be quite honest it’s exhausting, oh and expensive too. At a time of life when things should be getting easier in terms of finances and physical hard work, instead there is no chance of slowing down.
No I don’t regret it, he’s a joy, but I do admit to sometimes daydreaming about the life I would have now if I hadn’t started again.

Having the third nearly broke us - financially, emotionally, physically, matrimonially - and I can't believe we have got this far in one piece
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out if this is the case, a fourth child would probably finish off the breaking of you.... so why on earth would you consider unleashing that on the three children you already have?

I'm seriously broody but I would be approaching retirement when my kid was in university, I know it's not fair on them. Will console myself with exotic holidays and a fast car!

I’m with you OP! We have 2 and totally done l. Our marriage would not survive a 3 baby! We have only just stopped arguing about who is the most tired! This being said I do find myself craving for a baby even though I know I do not want one!!!

I agree with the person who said ask the children with older parents how they feel.

I've a couple of friends without their parents already as they had older parents and they're only in their 30s. I know people c an die at any age but think about how old they'll be when the tables turn and they have to start looking after you.

I'm 52 and ds3 is 12, ds2 is at university and ds3 really misses him. He asked me why we left it so long to have him. I don't regret having him but I do feel sorry for him and wish we'd had him about 5 years earlier. He said he feels like an only child most of the time.

Pregnant with my 2nd at 37 after feeling intensely broody, regretting it already having begun to seriously ponder being late 50s with a teenager... hoping these feelings will pass when he’s here

My parents died when I was young, they weren’t old. It just happens.