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Original poster

Paula Yates as represented in the Michael Hutchens doc

106 replies

lolaflores · 04/01/2020 16:28

I only caught up with this the other day and felt that Paula Yates didn't get a particularly even handed representation. She behaved badly to her ex husband and doesn't deserve any medals for that.
Apart from anything, the relationship was compressed into a couple of minutes. Their relationship was probably more high profile than lengthy but she had a child with him yet the details seemed so rushed through and there was a lot to take in.
No one spoke on her behalf. The voices of the other women were heard but it seemed that there wasn't anyone there for her so no account of what happened for her went unremarked.
The media were absolute trash to them both and the awful clip of her on HIGNFY was shown. They were both hounded so horribly.
It was all a horrible car crash but so many people were damaged and I felt sorry for her kids having to watch that 2D version of her.
I know she is and was divisive but has she or will she ever be rehabilitated?

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Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 17:10

I loved her on The Tube. And then there was the descent into anarchy and it was so horrible to watch.
She bit off more than she could chew on HIGNFY and it blew up in her face. I actually couldn;t watch it because at that point, she had become a joke and I felt sorry for her.

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Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 17:11

Why would she insist on that?

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BoneyBackJefferson · 04/01/2020 17:12

Sallycinnamum

The book is not exactly unbiased.

CoffeeCoinneseur · 04/01/2020 17:13

Why would she insist on that?

Accidental death v suicide...
Insurance payout maybe?

I don't know that for sure, just a guess.

mrwalkensir · 04/01/2020 17:14

Paula Yates had an awful bombshell dropped on her when her biological father "announced" that she was his at his funeral. She'd been treated badly by the Boomtown Rats who sneered at her for her chasing Bob. Sounds like Bob wouldn't change a nappy, and let people believe that she chose the children's names when they were ridiculed by the public. To blame her for running off with somebody who adored her as much as she did him is harsh. If Michael hadn't suffered the brain damage and loss of smell, things could have been very different. Merton and Hislop failed to take into account her vulnerability...

Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 17:17

She wasn't set up for an average life shall we say. All the stuff about her being Hughie Green's daughter. Running off with a vicar and the rest. Half a cartoon character the other half self invention. So hard to tell fact from fiction with her.
There must be an unbiased story about her or is she impossible to untangle.

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ElspethFlashman · 04/01/2020 17:23

I think she was a destructive selfish person tbh.

She first met MH in 1985. That was a year before she married Bob. According to legend she walked right up to MHs tour manager and told him "I'm going to have that boy". And she did, and that bed interview was a whole 9 years later and it had literally been going on for years.

During that time she had 3 kids with Geldof, so I imagine how catastrophic it was for him to realise it had been going on intermittently the whole time.

I really don't have a lot of sympathy for someone who builds a family with someone whilst keeping someone else in reserve.

Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 17:26

That explains the photo on the fridge. Right

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Ginger1982 · 04/01/2020 17:27

I don't know much about their marriage but I've always admired Bob for taking Tiger Lily in after Paula died.

Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 17:27

Not just a random, whimsical thing. My DH know about me and Tom Hardy....in my head! I thought it was meant the same way. Not that shed actually met him.

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Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 17:29

Yes. Tiger staying with her sisters in the family home, considering all the hurt he must have gone through was an act of selflessness on his part. Would I do the same?
I hope i would.

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CatInTheDaytime · 04/01/2020 17:42

Haven't seen this doc. But I'm actually usually surprised that people are nice about her - I've often heard her friends describe her as lovely and a devoted mum in interviews.

Of course her kids loved her, that's what kids do but her actions caused chaos for them.

a home wrecker, a drug addict, awful parent, adulteress

She was all these things and what's more she let her decisions impact hugely on her kids. If a male celeb cheated on his wife to that extent, that openly and smugly, took drugs while in sole charge of his DC etc I don't think people would be bothering to look for his positive side!

I remember when Peaches died there was an article by someone who'd known her saying they remembered Paula saying "Peaches IS me". That made me shudder because it reminded me of my own narc mum. Not able to put her kids' needs first.

Of course she was hugely messed up and I was sorry for her, but having a damaging childhood doesn't have to make you a bad parent or selfish chaotic person.

MayFayner · 04/01/2020 17:44

Why would she insist on that?

Because she perceived his suicide as a rejection of her, maybe. Or didn’t want others to perceive it as such.

ElspethFlashman · 04/01/2020 17:48

Yeah she really pushed the auto erotic asphyxiation thing, I'm sure there are people who still believe it.

It wasn't though.

SunbeamsOverhead · 04/01/2020 17:51

She died 20 years ago on her daughter's 10th birthday.
I'm sure the family would rather people stop talking about it now. It's so sad.

I also find it quite odd that you started a thread on this op.

CatInTheDaytime · 04/01/2020 17:54

Lots of famous people's lives and deaths continue to be discussed much more than 20 years later! And often get made into TV shows, dramas etc. It's normal.

Sagradafamiliar · 04/01/2020 18:00

Poor woman is dead. It was a sad end to a chaotic life, does she really need a bunch of MNers tutting about her decades after the event? The only misery it will bring is to her surviving children.
Fwiw I don't think she could've been that bad, Michael's seemed to make consistently good choices romantically despite all his personal problems, don't think his tastes would've suddenly changed to home wrecking drug addled she devils or whatever else sounds like a tabloid headline.

InfiniteSheldon · 04/01/2020 18:04

I think I will reserve sympathy for the 2 year old baby found alone after hours with her dead mothers body because Paula was more interested in jacking heroin than caring for her

Waterandlemonjuice · 04/01/2020 18:07

I read her autobiography years ago and at the time she didn’t even drink, much less do drugs. Terribly sad, her death and her daughter finding her dead.

RamonaFlower · 04/01/2020 18:09

If a male celeb cheated on his wife to that extent, that openly and smugly, took drugs while in sole charge of his DC etc I don't think people would be bothering to look for his positive side

I think you're wrong, actually. Plenty of celebrity fathers do exactly that. Kurt Cobain to name but one (maybe not the cheating, but there are plenty of other examples of drug taking, cheating male rock stars to choose from), while Courtney is made out to be the bitch from hell.

It's misogyny, pure and simple.

RamonaFlower · 04/01/2020 18:11

Also, I'm not condoning that behaviour. But people vilify women more than they would a man.

Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 18:17

I dont think a thread about her is odd. She was an interesting figure. She was someone I was very interested in back in the day. To me she was glamorous and clever and sure of herself. There were not too many women like her at the time that I was aware of. She stood out to me and I wish she hadn't ended up how she did.
Did MH get dragged to pieces about his drug use? Or did his Rock God card get him off a bit lighter?

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CatInTheDaytime · 04/01/2020 18:21

I wasn't talking about drug use in itself - obviously loads of celebs do that, both male and female.

More her attitude to cheating, like it was fun to humiliate her husband, and taking heroin when in sole charge of a small child.

(Obviously as a woman she was far more likely to be in sole charge of a child in the first place, which is unfair.)

Original poster
lolaflores · 04/01/2020 18:28

I think shed lost all sense of the world and where she was in it and what she was supposed to be doing. How she was left in charge of a kid given her condition is a question too. Yes, she chose to use drugs but no one could say she was fit to care for her kid?

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happinessischocolate · 04/01/2020 18:34

But she wasn't a good mother.

A good mother puts their children first.

She took drugs whilst in charge of a 2 year old, not sure how much worse you can do as a parent.

The programme was about MH, I think they pretty much glossed over his last relationship which was all they could do, if they had got a friend or relative to speak for her, then other friends or relatives may have disputed the story.

OP you feel sorry for her so the programme wasn't one sided as there will be others who will feel the same.