16 year old thinks she rules the roost.

[shuuush]

16 year old thinks rules don't apply to her since she got a part time job (she's still in college and works part time).

She's working tonight and just announced she isn't coming home after work she's going to a mates. I wouldn't mind if she had asked but she's just spring it on me as she was about to leave. Then when I asked who I got a load of abuse and off she flounces.

Another example is this morning she had her hair straighteners laid straight on my coffee table I told her to move them as she would scorch the wood and got told to fuck off then when her dad told her she had a full on screaming tantrum about how evil we were and just wanted to start on her.

I can't change the WiFi she has unlimited data and she has her own money from working.

I'm just fed up and feel powerless to prevent her doing whatever she wants while treating me and her dad like shit on her shoe.

nasty little madam. Yes, off to mates, fine (good riddance) but the wilful damage and the abuse must make her really difficult to love.

treat like a child until she behaves. Bin straighteners as she's a fire risk. Stop all non-essential services. Explain calmly why and what is expected, same as with a toddler.

Wow think some posters are totally missing the point of this thread. She's 16. She's not earning that much money washing pots , so surely still relying on OP for quite a significant amount. She lives under your roof and the least she can do is show you a bit of respect.

She may be paying for her contract but surely it's not in her name at that age? I didn't think under 18s could have a phone contract (correct me if I'm wrong , totally could be) that'd be going.

I do agree at 16 you should have more independence but not sure who she thinks she is telling her parents to fuck off and swanning in at 4am.

I would tell her she's out of the house by 31 January.
And make sure that she does move out.
Then she can go and crash with her super great mates and go make her millions in her part time job, seeing as she knows it all.

Lol at the posters who haven't read the OPs posts. And lol at the 'I left home, owned my own home and was managing director of Lloyd's Bank by 16' posts 🙄.

OP, you sound reasonable and sensible. Personally I wouldn't do any of the dramatic things suggested. They will
Just fuel the fire and will provide proof to her about how unreasonable you are.

I'd just withdraw from helping her out and I'd tell her why.

I would keep repeating that you won't be sworn at and that you expect some respect. I think a letter might be a good idea but it would depend a bit on your daughter.

Does she have moments of behaving normally? Can you discuss any of this with her or is it a definite banned subject.

Can you tease her about it? Can you and your husband start telling each other to fuck off all day. I don't know. It's a tricky situation. You need to pick your battles I suppose. Good luck.

@HouseworkAvoider10 You don't think it would be a better option to try and salvage the relationship while getting the OPs daughter to understand expectations, rather than just kick her out?