Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

What would you tell your 18 year old self?

111 replies

Crazypanda85 · 26/12/2019 22:39

Just interested, if you could go back and tell yourself anything at 18 what would it be?
I'd tell myself :
Stop chasing pricks that aren't worth your time & you'll find a job you like and are good at stop worrying.
Oh and you aren't fat so stop worrying about that too.

OP posts:
Namestranger · 27/12/2019 01:50

go live your life instead of being terrified of it

This is such good advice. Happy to say after 33 years barely leaving the town I was born in I've quit my job and am doing some traveling Crown Grin

Mocha3105 · 27/12/2019 02:24

Ignore what everyone else says you should do.
Stop going through life like a tick box exercise.
Save, go travelling.
Don't marry the first bloke. And pick someone else to have kids with, if that's what you really want.
Your parents are not your responsibility.
Your childhood was not your fault.
Live your life and make yourself happy.

livinlife · 27/12/2019 02:24

@MuchTooTired wow I feel like you wrote that to me 🥺 was diagnosed with anxiety and Infertility. I do think uni is for me as I want to be a nurse however I need CBT first. I hope you're in a better place now 💐💐

mrbob · 27/12/2019 02:36

Drink less. Get some decent counseling and you might actually meet someone nice once you have sorted your issues out- way easier at 20 than at 40!
Get some hobbies and work out what YOU like doing. Enjoy life- don’t just exist
I discovered all these things at about 35...

YearofMisAdventure · 27/12/2019 02:44

Don't pick your University based on your current boyfriend.
Think/dream big.
No one knows what they are doing!

Verily1 · 27/12/2019 02:53

Dump him

Stop/ cut down drinking

Study more

Join clubs at uni

Get the implant

Stay in uni city during the holidays and get a decent part time job

mumofone94 · 27/12/2019 03:06

Don't trust your "best friend"

Listen to your mum, she only wants what's best for you.

You end up marrying him and 2 years later you're blessed with a beautiful baby girl.

Chairshame · 27/12/2019 03:07

Read Law, like you planned. Not Modern Languages.

coffeeicer · 27/12/2019 03:15

Move home to your mums, stop trying to escape, try to understand her and appreciate her more now, you don't need to 'grow up' yet. Save some money, you don't need all those clothes/shoes/makeup. Don't tie yourself down to this moron he's going to go back to his ex (you knew he would)... and you will be fine, please stop worrying so much.

alexdgr8 · 27/12/2019 03:17

you don't have to stay in a job where you are not valued. look around. try the civil service.
don't let men take liberties. research assertiveness. speak up for yourself. try to communicate better with parent, have more patience.
get a different driving instructor. walk away from uncomfortable situations, domineering people.
keep a journal, or at least a diary.

Bluewavescrashing · 27/12/2019 03:32

You don't need to sleep with randoms to make yourself feel better (low self esteem).

Do some work at uni! (I did pass fine but didn't make the most of it).

xJodiex · 27/12/2019 03:59

Tell myself to chill the fuck out and wear a damn mouth guard to save my stupid teeth.

lifesnotaspectatorsport · 27/12/2019 04:05

It will all be fine! You will find someone who loves you, you'll have wonderful friends, you'll travel the world, you'll even have children one day (despite insisting you don't want them), you'll have a good career and be financially independent. Life is wonderful - go out there and live it, don't look back and don't listen to your father; he doesn't know you half as well as he thinks he does.

Oh, and get that nose job at 25 not 35! Wink

willowmelangell · 27/12/2019 04:09

Stop trying to be all things to all people. Stop worrying about what people think of you.

Havetobamechangeforthisone · 27/12/2019 05:32

Your mother doesn't love you. You'll never win her approval. She doesn't want what is best for you; she isn't looking out for you Her 'advice' is intended to sabotage you.

DO NOT LISTEN TO HER.

Havetobamechangeforthisone · 27/12/2019 05:33

My life would be so very different in so many ways if only I'd know that ^

Ludways · 27/12/2019 08:34

@livinlife you're welcome!
I limped through my degree. I had a blast at uni but I never considered my future happiness and how that would hang so heavily on my results.

Taddda · 27/12/2019 08:37

@Havetobamechangeforthisone I could have also written that one - think that would have been a definate gamechanger for me.

Busymummy16 · 27/12/2019 08:38

Your period pains aren’t normal and you need medical help (25 years later turns out I’ve got severe endometriosis).

Disillusioneddaisy · 27/12/2019 08:39

Don't chase anyone. The worthwhile ones won't need to be chased

milliefiori · 27/12/2019 08:39

Your parents are actually insane. Earn some money, focus on your degree and getting a good job, ideally abroad, thousands of miles from them, and cut contact. Avoid being the nursemaid to insane 'friends' who spot you as an ideal free carer because you've had so much experience in your young life so far. Develop friendships instead with kind, sane people who can cope with life. It will save you decades of mental ill health. By the way, you are lovable, and by the time you are thirty you'll have met the man who proves it, so you can relax and enjoy your twenties. You have a long, happy marriage to a kind, sane man ahead of you.

dudsville · 27/12/2019 08:42

Things are going to get so, so much better.

FVFrog · 27/12/2019 08:45

Get some help for your low self esteem and stop drinking too much and feeling like you always have to have a boyfriend.
Embrace university properly, do some work and properly enjoy your course, join some clubs, get some new experiences. Do some exercise, you’re really good at it and it becomes your (second) career.

fessmess · 27/12/2019 08:55

You are not fat. Enjoy these days as the future is full of responsibilities and is shit.

Work hard at uni, you will regret getting a 3rd

Pinkarsedfly · 27/12/2019 09:02

The way your new boyfriend is behaving is not acceptable. Dump him.