Is there anywhere left in the UK that's nice and safe to live?

[christmasandcounting]

Thinking of moving back. Any recommendations?

Or maybe the OP has been reading right wing newspapers?

I'm in the NW and the aggro over whether it used to be the Coop or a butcher's in the empty shop next to the deli has to be seen to be believed. You don't want to get between those local historians.

I'll ask my armed guard.

Seriously what are you expecting, sheet outs on every corner of every town?

Likelylass - don't forget Oxford's high murder rate especially in academic circles

Shoot not sheet grrr

Sorry OP if you think we're mocking your question - it's just your thread title comes across as a bit patronising.

Avoid Somerset. We had an earthquake here last week.

I live in Stalybridge, like a village outside of Manchester and it's the safest place iv lived

Where are you moving from? It might help us get some perspective. Plus, I'm intrigued 😂

midsummermurderess

Never been on Netmums in my life so fuck off dear. Been on Mumsnet 15 years.

The fucking left REALLY need to start growing up

Here in the rural East Midlands we only leave the house in armoured cars, and the lawns are studded with man traps and razor wire.

In actual news, the closest we have had to crime was two robbers trying to nick the church collection box, but who threw it into a hedge when chased through the churchyard by two dog walkers with a Jack Russell and an elderly pug.

Rural Somerset. It’s bloody anarchy here. Even the deer are on weed.

Strange and rather vague question.

I live in an area of West London with neighbors ranging from Hollywood stars, children of royalty, a large council estate and the family of a jailed radical preacher. Is there crime - well, yes. Have I ever felt unsafe, no. Have I ever directly been mugged/robbed/threatened - no. I have had my car riffled through several times when I have inadvertently forgotten to lock it, but nothing was ever taken (I only keep things in the boot and these opportunist robbers CBA to look in there).

Most places in the U.K. are perfectly safe and pleasant places to live.

Channel Islands, Jersey has reasonably low crime, except St Helier On weekend nights, loads of drunk fighting. Houses very expensive, loads of traffic 24/7

You deffo don't want to live in striking distance of a Harry Tuffins. Powys is vile, horrid, don't come.

I live in a place which seems pretty crime free and I almost always leave my car and house unlocked. We do have shocking amounts of homelessness and poverty though.

Tubridy to be fair being gummed and slobbered on by an elderly pug probably counts as extreme violation of yer actual human rights if you are a millennial thug. And a Jack Russell could easily make a nasty tear in your designer tracky trousers which could be upsetting and humiliating for someone with a half decent solicitor.

Midsummer has a high murder rate, avoid at all costs

I have family who used to live in one of the places they filmed Midsummer (Midsommer?) Murders in. They all remain noticeable unmurdered.

If the country you are in sells small bottles of self-defence tear gas over the counter, then stock up and fill your suitcase. You'll need to carry it at all times. That's just for the chuggers on the high street.

Fair point, @viques. Actually, the only time I’ve been bitten by anyone other than my own toddler was by a tiny elderly Jack Russell.

Although, @DianaT1969, in an emergency, dry shampoo is a good substitute for tear gas. Or Lynx. Lynx might actually be more dangerous than tear gas.

Rural Northumbria is a hellhole. The Duke has a slab of John Smith's on open view in his living room, and their TV is of chavtastic dimensions. Meanwhile, snarling matrons bite each others ears off over the last dozen langoustines at Amble harbour.

Also, if you have teenage daughters, you'll need to steer clear of a particular member of the Royal Family. He frequents Pizza Express in Woking.