DD9 broke her collar bone and I sent her to school on a spoon of Calpol!

[JeSuisPrest]

DD (9) fell out of bed last night at midnight (fast asleep, not messing about). She complained of a painful shoulder and was pretty upset. She could move both arms but one was obviously painful. She can be a bit of a drama llama so I made all the right noises, gave her some Calpol and she settled after a while. It was agony this morning and I had to help her dress. I said we would go to the local walk in straight away, but she had an event at school this morning she didn't want to miss and said she wanted to go in. If it was still painful she would tell a teacher. I got the call at lunchtime to say she was very upset. I took her to the walk in - broken collar bone. I feel like the shittest mum in the world.

Please make me feel better and tell me about times when you've not believed your children were ill/injured and packed them off to school with a dose of Calpol and the time honoured phrase "The teacher will call me if I need to come and get you" ringing in their ears... 😳

Put your hand on your collar bone. It is a thick, prominent bone in a highly sensitive region with lots of nerve endings. Imagine your child is in agony in front of you and you suspect it is because this bone is broken. Do you a) give calpol and send her to school or b) go straight to a & e? Hmmm. Tricky one.

Mn is such bullshit. Chimps at type writers could make more convincing 'parental' posts than most of what i've seen here tonight.

Dont worry OP. Children are funny things, I've known some to soldier on through broken ankles etc.

I was the opposite of cry wolf, my DM warned me many times not to run barefoot around patio, as I would injure myself. Well I caught my toe on a slab and saw it pointing in a funny direction, i think it was the shock and the "oh shit" moment of not listening to my DM but I didn't make that much noise, enough for DM to poke her head out ask if I were ok, I said yes and acted natural. I hobbled around the rest of the day trying not to make it obvious. DM cottoned on later that night and made me show her. Her face was and it somehow made her feel even worse, like I was too terrified to tell my DM when I hurt myself (I wasnt btw )

My mother's a nurse who has worked in my hospital wards, especially A&E. I was thrown down the stairs on a regular basis by my sister and landed on my elbow in a really awkward position. I told her when she got home after being out for hours that my elbow really hurt. She looked at it and made some vaguely soothing noises and said nothing else about it.

Went to school the next morning to sit a mock exam. I couldn't lift my arm up enough to hold the paper straight as it was so painful. My teacher phoned her as she was concerned. My mother's response was "staple the exam paper to the desk".

It was only 2 weeks later she thought an x-ray would be a good idea. It was clearly broken.

Don't feel too bad OP! At least you found out and it can now be managed correctly. Hope she's not too sore and it heals soon.

My slipped whilst running along the sofa ( she’d already been told off but carried on ) she said her foot was hurting but was no bruise and she was still walking on it, after a week she was limping a bit so we took her to hospital as advised by dr just to be safe, only turns out she broke and impossible bone in her foot, only other person who’s broken that was David beckham. So she’d been going to school all week 😱

Mn is such bullshit. Chimps at type writers could make more convincing 'parental' posts than most of what i've seen here tonight.

Do you find it so hard to believe that people don't spot fractures?

The orthopaedic surgeon who treated my dd for her broken elbow told me he had sent his son to school with a similar injury thinking it was a bruise.

I know a consultant whose specialty is respiratory medicine who diagnosed his son's whooping cough as "a minor upper respiratory tract infection".

My son fell and broke his elbow (needed surgery and a metal pin implant eventually) at a cross country event. He got up, kept running, and had his best time. The medics there thought he was fine. A day later he went for an x ray.

it happens.

A couple that I am friendly with sent their son to school with a broken leg after a sports injury. They are both A&E consultants. Anyone can make a mistake, and, particularly in children, fractures are not always as obvious as you might think.

Me! I was 5 and I was being given a piggy back ride by the teaching assistants grown up daughter who had come to help her out at after school club because she had nothing else to do (90s was a very different time)! She dropped me and then fell on top of me.

I was sent to the head who was still in work and she made me take my arm out of my dress in a really weird way that hurt but declared it 'fine' sent me off to play.

Dad came to collect me 3 hours later and I was sat colouring In instead of playing. With a wet paper towel on my arm (fixes everything) took me home and cooked tea.

At bath time he asked me to put both arms in the air and the sore one didn't want to go all the way up so we went to A&E and mum met us there.

Drs declared it bruised but x rayed it anyway and diagnosed a very bad break of my collar bone that required full rest as the bone was broken (obviously) but one part of it was sat on top of the other. I still have a lump where it's healed weird!

It happens. My 73 year old dad fell from the stairs, had a little pain in his shoulder, couldn't really move it, took a paracetamol and went to sleep. After three days he went to his standing physio appointment who asked what was wrong and told him to go to A&E. Turns out he ripped most of his shoulder ligaments in half. He was surprised because it just didn't hurt bad enough to actually be something.

Mner: I was driving past this council estate and i saw a child of 9 with no coat - in October! When her dad came outside he started shouting at her. There was an old sofa in the front garden. What should i do?

MN hive mind: social services. Now!

MNer: My child was in agony but i sent her to school anyway. Turns out she had a broken collar bone. Can you all say something reassuring to stave of the hint of guilt that's beginning to bother me?

MN hive mind: Don't worry! I accidentally ran all my kids over with the 4x4 when they were young and sent them to school anyway! We still laugh about it now

My mum did similar to me when I was 9. I fell while playing outside and banged my wrist. Went home crying to my mum who said it was just a bump and put me to bed with medicine for the pain
Next morning my arm was huge and bright purple so we had a fun 5 hour trip to a&e where even the receptionist knew it was broken 😂 I’ve never let my mum hear the end of that one

@pallisers

Not spotting it because the presentation is subtle and blatantly ignoring a child in agony are two different things. OP didn't accidentally miss this, OP chose to ignore the facts in front of her.

I’m sure the op feels guilty and if she could turn back time she wouldn’t do the same thing. Hindsight is great but this does happen a lot (obv from this thread) and I don’t see the point in the suggestions and discussion of children’s services getting involved. I’m quite sure the threshold for this is much higher and the worst that could happen is a few questions. The op has now done what is needed and any follow up could be done, rather than pp judging the situation from a story posted online- which may or may not be accurate.
Wish people would relax a bit on here and treat it as a supportive network rather than a place to judge and blame. Just be kind!

If it makes you feel any better, I've done similar things with my own body - I've great form for breaking something, telling myself it's just a sprain and carrying on with life. It's never just a sodding sprain it seems!

I cycled to a university lecture, and then to A&E (and then back home again) on a broken foot when I was a student. Made sure I finished giving the dog a long walk with an arm that turned out to be broken. Did an hour's drive home in a manual car with what turned out to be a broken elbow (and later had to spend time scrubbing blood from the car - in my defence I was in the middle of nowhere, alone, with no other way of getting home)

I think the only time I've sought immediate medical attention was a broken knee, but that was an ambulance job as I couldn't move an inch without agony, let alone get myself to hospital!

DS spent 4 days walking around with a fractured knee before we took him to A&E!

Hurt it playing football, thought nothing of it as he very often has a sore knee after a match. Took him straight to watch our local club in their last match of the season, he spent it in tears, but i put that down to the fact that we were being relegated.
Turns out his knee was fractured in 3 places! Months of wearing a brace,many xrays and MRI scans and 7 months later and still not completely healed.

I've broken a bone and not known about it.

I slipped and fell in a car park, thought I'd broken something, as I was in absolute agony.

DH, took me to MI.

Had it xrayed, just a bad sprain I'm told, but I see your previous fracture healed well.

What previous fracture I ask, I've never broken my foot before. This one here says the doc and shows me on the x-ray!!

No idea when or how I broke it, but break it I did!

I fell out of a tree age 10 and my mum/dad left me for 3 days before taking me to hospital- arm was broken!

I also had experience last year with 1yo DS (first child so didn't have a clue what was normal). He had a cold type virus and seemed quiet but OK, I sent him to nursery with calpol and got a call 20 minutes later saying they felt he needed to be seen by a Dr. Long story short we were in hospital with him for a week and nearly lost him on the first night. I felt like the worst human being for not having realised how serious it was. A year on I can view it witj a bit more self-compassion in that I love my son (as I'm sure you love your DD) and we cannot be perfect as parents all of the time. Xx

Someone I know had 'a bit of a twinge in her leg' after an accident one day. As it was late at night the only medical option was A&E. She wanted no fuss though and was adamant a local clinic would suffice but it was closed, she thought it was a sprain. She had emergency surgery that night and needed a years rehabilitation to gain strength to walk properly again.

Sometimes even the person suffering doesn't really understand the true extent of an injury.

Hope your daughter recovers quickly OP.

I was sent to school with what turned out to be food poisoning because I hadn't started to vomit yet and my mum was a massive hardarse about absences :D It happens OP!

If it makes you feel better, when I broke my collarbone (way back in 08), I got back on my bicycle and cycled all the way home before noticing something was actually wrong when I couldn't lift my hand high enough to open my front door. It's weird what the body does.

Your poor daughter though, I've broken many bones (lucky me) and the collar bone was BY FAR the worst. You use it for everything, she won't even be able to lift anything moderately weighty in the other hand for a while. And sleeping on one's back.. horrific. (definitely don't sneeze!)

@Hadenoughofitall441 don't feel bad! When I broke my third metatarsal (not the second admittedly), I walked/hobbled on it for a month before we figured out it was a break.

Not a child but my husband hurt his ankle skiing, skied for another 2 days on it. Flew home, got a train across London back to out local station, walked back home and then said he’d get it checked out the next day.

Turns out he’d broken it, was in a boot for 6 weeks and narrowly missed surgery.

These things happen, in the scheme of things your DD wasn’t left that long before getting it seen to.