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Original poster

Would you let you DS 14 nearly 15 take alcohol to a friends?

85 replies

Overseasmom100 · 30/11/2019 18:13

So DS is going to a party/hang out at a friends tonight. The friend is a girl wgo is part of his social circle...parents there and it's from 7pm and they said everyone to go home by -11.30pm. He has asked if can take a pizza, some capri suns AND 2 cans of dark fruits.

I was surprised. He has told me he has tried the cider before and doesnt really like it so I said well why then. He said he doesnt mind one.

I know alot of my friebds ler their kids dtonk the odd one at parties, in the summer. He is a sensible boy and does a competitative sport so know he wouldnt be stupid.

Just wanted to know a few peoples views.

OP posts:
rhowton · 30/11/2019 18:42

He asked you... he trusts you enough to tell the truth. Don't punish him. You know what he is going to have and how much if it. HE WILL LIE NEXT TIME and you might not know where he is or how much I'm he is drinking!!

BennyTheBall · 30/11/2019 18:43

No way and I would hate the parents who would.

PotteringAlong · 30/11/2019 18:46

No no no.

Interested in this thread?

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14 year olds
AShaveAndAHarecutHalfPrice · 30/11/2019 18:47

No

AuntieStella · 30/11/2019 18:49

No.

I let my mid teens have DD glass at celebrations where we can keep an eye on them (ditto with friends/family we completely trust to have similar standards).

But not booze to parties (where they might be unsupervised).

So in your circs it rather depends on how well you know the parents, whether will be present, and whether you think the 'two drink' rule will be enforced

BackforGood · 30/11/2019 18:54

@rhowton. OP isn't punishing him. No-one on this thread has mentioned punishing him.
OP is talking with him and there is absolutely no reason to think that a 14 yr old (who doesn't even really like it) is going to turn into some raging alcoholic or someone who is drinking spirits from brown paper bags in the park, because his parent is doing just that - parenting

[confusing]

hopelesssuitcase · 30/11/2019 18:57

I don't imagine it's that easy for a 14 or 15 year old to get alcohol these days. Much stricter purchasing rules than when I was young

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 30/11/2019 19:00

Not a chance. Neither would they be attending a party that had it.

Practicalmagico · 30/11/2019 19:01

Nope

lanbro · 30/11/2019 19:03

We did this at that age, always fairly low alcohol, definitely not spirits, and because we were trusted no one broke that trust...

spacepyramid · 30/11/2019 19:04

No. That said, there would probably already be alcohol there so that would be an issue to be addressed.

PizzaExpressWoking · 30/11/2019 19:04

Fuck no

90schic · 30/11/2019 19:11

No I wouldn’t give it to him OP, Agree with others it wouldn’t look good him turning up with alcohol that you have him tbh.

I remember getting drunk at 14 from stolen alcohol from parents cupboard Blush so don’t think it’s unusual for kids at 14 to want to try out alcohol. I think it’s nice he asked you. I was definitely not close enough to my parents to ask them for booze, would of probably got a swift hiding for that Grin

GreenTulips · 30/11/2019 19:15

I don’t see the harm in them learning about drinking in a safe environment

I’ve seen far too many of DDs friends almost comatose or hospitalised because their parents disapproved of drinking and they’d go overboard down the park or beach.

One isn’t going to harm

TheLittleBrownFox · 30/11/2019 19:15

It woulds be a no from me - but you can get alcohol free versions of a lot of drinks now, including fruit ciders (i know a pub with a huge range). Would he take one of those or becks blue or something, or would that be even less 'cool' than not taking any?

trickyex · 30/11/2019 19:16

No. My DS is the same age and I wouldnt accept this.

carly2803 · 30/11/2019 19:18

NO. absolutely not.

But, i would give your DS credit for being open and honest with you. That is how to parent!

TreacherousPissFlap · 30/11/2019 19:18

DS has at 15 and a couple months.

I figured it was better that he asked and we chatted about the situation. The first time he must have been like an elderly maiden aunt with a gin and lemon, the second time he was inexplicably "tired" the next day and later confessed to having got "a bit emotional"
We live quite remotely so it's not like he has the opportunity to be on it every weekend so I figured it was fairly harmless. I may have been stricter if we lived more centrally and he had greater opportunity to access it TBH.

Blueemeraldagain · 30/11/2019 19:20

As long as you know he will just drink some of his mates’ drink.

ncqtime · 30/11/2019 19:22

That's enough to get tipsy at that age surely? It would be a no from me. Plenty of 0.5% offerings in supermarkets think I'd allow that

Northernsoullover · 30/11/2019 19:22

No I wouldn't. I hate all this 'drinking in a safe environment bollocks'. Why is alcohol presented as a fait accompli? Especially as rates of young people who drink are going down. I've told my teens that drinking after 18 is up to them but before then please try and resist peer pressure. Alcohol causes so much harm. Present them with the harmful facts and hope they make the right decision.

Alicatz66 · 30/11/2019 19:22

I wouldn't let him .. it's a bit young .. I'd say 16 minimum ...

HowToBeAWoman · 30/11/2019 19:23

Not a chance

Pegase · 30/11/2019 19:27

No I wouldn't. As I am well aware that a lot of these parties 'supervised' by parents are anything but.

EvaHarknessRose · 30/11/2019 19:27

Don't condone or encourage, tell him there’s no rush and he doesn’t need alcohol to have a fun time.