Baby taken away by social services whilst in A&E

[napol]

Hi

I'm new to Mumsnet but am in desperate need of help/advice or better still has anyone out there been in the same situation as me.

I dropped my 10 month old boy at nursery one morning at 8am. He was his normal self - happy chappy with no injuries. I got a call from the nursery at 4.30pm from the manager saying despite no accident happening at nursery throughout the day he had developed a lump on the side of his head but not to worry as he was in no pain or discomfort but best I get it checked out.

we picked him up and took him to a&e immediately where to our horror he was diagnosed with a fractured skull. because the injury was unexplained social services and police were called and the decision was made not to let us take our baby boy home. We are now under investigation and cannot see him unless supervised. it looks like it will go to court months down the line.

We are innocent of any neglect or wrong doing and it seems to us the nursery are obviously to blame. Understandably we are devastated and heartbroken and just want our boy home

But kids fall over all the time at nursery, I'm always being asked to sign something to say I acknowledge they fell and bump their head. It's not a big deal if it was a simple fall. Why would they lie?

If it was not a simple fall, i.e falling from the changing table, you a re talking multiple people being involved in a lie and cover up, over an accidental event, also likely involving the supervisor. Why?

I'm sorry you're going through this and hope it gets investigated properly and your DS is okay.

It's not a big deal if it was a simple fall. Why would they lie?

They’d lie if it wasn’t a simple fall and due to their neglect or carelessness.

A nursery worker locally to me was prosecuted for lifting a child by their arm and flinging them across the room. All caught on camera.

At 9.30 at night as well (ie when the thread was started) it's not as though she can do anything else about it and it must be absolutely overwhelming. The house feels quiet and wrong when my 11yo goes on a sleepover. It must feel really weird to be without your baby/toddler especially when they are your only child.

I don't think this thread is here to scaremonger (about nurseries or SS) and I don't think it's helpful to insinuate that it is. This is a support website - if you don't want to hear about accidents happening at nurseries, click away from the thread.

It's completely natural to seek out people who have had similar experiences in an unfamiliar situation.

@ahhgoongoongoonhaveacupoftea seriously? Scaring parents who use a nursery FFS? What about all the parents who post about sick or dying kids or kids in accidents. Just stop.

Almost a decade ago, my colleague's 3 months old rolled off the bed whilst mum was changing him and he fell on the floor. He was alright but as baby was small they took him to a&e to be checked. Got referred to social services immediately as after a scan there appeared to be a small bump on the head.
What followed was an absolute horror show. Child got taken to forster care. Supervised visit for parents. Court case followed. Cost the tax payer almost a million pounds and in the end the judge said all the accusation toward the parents hurting the child was baseless. Child came home when he was one year old. I am sorry you are going through this. It's a tough time but keep fighting and your child will come home.

@Glacecherrychops you would think that incidences would be noticed in a nursery. And yet...

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7655473/amp/Paedophile-nursery-worker-shouldnt-children-targeted-GIRLS.html

@IWorkAtTheCheescakeFactory

That's awful. But I could tell you about 20+cases where the dad/step dad had been abusing their child and the mum had no idea. Many more in the media too.

On the balance of probability I would say the male parent is much more likely than a group of nursery workers.

But I could tell you about 20+cases where the dad/step dad had been abusing their child and the mum had no idea. Many more in the media too.

Oh of course! I wasn’t saying I know this wasn’t the father. I can’t say that. I was just answering your question about why the nursery might lie.

I thought Glacecherrychops was leaving the thread.

For starters- please get yourselves decent legal representation, don’t just rely on legal aid

You realise the solicitors who do legal aid work are the same solicitors you pay for, yes?

The possibilities are endless, but the investigation will hinge on what is likely, based on the evidence.

A skull fracture in an child under 1 in the absence of a plausible explanation is always child abuse until proven otherwise. Saying 'oh I bet it's the nursery' is unhelpful, as it's far more likely to be a parent than a rogue nursery worker, though the latter isn't impossible.

I thought Glacecherrychops was leaving the thread.

Good point

door swings on way out

@napolI would leave this thread / have it deleted now if I were you!

People are horrible on here and you aren't getting any good advice!

Best of luck x

Care proceedings are a highly specialised area of family law. Anyone doing it regularly will be a legal aid firm. Because all parents in care proceedings get legal aid.

OP if you are in Kent/Surrey/Sussex I can suggest you a fantastic care specialist, if you feel unsure of the advice you have had so far.

I’ve just seen your post to say he has white/blonde thin hair, I’m sorry Op, if the bump would be so visible due to him not having much hair the nursery would have seen this immediately after you dropped him off.

Ignore all the people saying there’s more to this, your child had been injured & you don’t know why. They’ve removed your child until they know why. It’s as simple as that. There doesn’t have to be a huge back story for SS to get involved. It can be as simple as an unexplained injury

My son came home from school with a huge bump on his forehead. He's 9 so told me how it happened (he fell while chasing his mates outside-total accident). School didn't tell me or send an accident slip home. I went into school and asked for the accident book, nothing in there at all. Initially they told me they didn't know anything about it at all. That night I went through a timeline with my son and it turned out that he had reported it to a dinner lady, who reported it to his teacher, who sent him to the head, who sent him to reception to fill in an accident form. The new receptionist couldn't find the accident form and sent him back to class. I went back in and the still told me no one knew what had happened. I gave them the list of people who did know and eventually over three or four days they admitted that each of them did know and that there had been a "breakdown in communication".

I'm now probably "that parent" and they do ring me for every single tiny injury but please keep on at the nursery OP, there must be an explanation for your sons injury.

op please ignore the posts that are unhelpful. The horror of cases likes yours will always frighten other parents. It is every parents living nightmare, and I am only sorry it is happening to you.

Babies get removed all of the time for exactly the reason you have stated, because the SS have to be absolutely 100% sure of the facts, and with a small baby they can not take any risk. This is no way a reflection of you, your parenting or your economic position (!!) it is to cover their own backs and to ensure the baby is safe until the facts are established. As heartbreaking as it is for you, it is there for the safety and well being of all children, with good reason.

You definitely need a lawyer that specialises in this area, and not just someone from legal aid.

I completely disagree that this poor womans post is putting mothers off of using childcare, my one and two and a half year old sons are currently in nursery as we speak, my hubby and I fully agree that the SS were right in what they did, an instance where a child could obtain an unexplained fractured skull shows at the very least extreme negligence on someone's part as even with accidents I have known every time my son's have fell off the sofa, knocked a door frame, tripped. If mum is telling the truth and is not hiding an accident at home out of fear, then it is possible that it could have happened at the child's care provider.

This mum regardless is clearly in need of some support, not being shamed for daring to reach out. Honestly the story about the sex offending nursery worker who was recently released from prison had more impact on me than this poor mother's story and people preferring to hide their heads in the sand because something makes them feel uncomfortable is their own problem.

You realise the solicitors who do legal aid work are the same solicitors you pay for, yes?

This is inaccurate.

OP, so sorry to read this and I hope it's resolved quickly.

I just wanted to add that lumps don't always appear straight away after bumps to the head. Years ago my 8-month-old DC had a nasty bump to the forehead (fell on tarmac, but no fracture). The GP checked DC and just said to keep a watchful eye - all OK apart from extra crying that night. 2 days later an egg-shaped lump appeared. Paediatrician at children's A&E told me this was normal. (We were allowed to go home after DC had been checked again and I'd explained exactly how it happened.)

OP this is legitimately one of my worst fears.

To me based solely on what you have told us, it seems like something has happened at nursery. Make sure that you ask as many questions as you possibly can. There should be something recorded as they asked you about calpol. There should be records for everything, as I understand it they should be hot on paperwork now, our nursery wont even apply sudocrem without me signing a form.

Posters who are insinuating its OPs other half because its "statistically more likely" are incredibly unhelpful. OP came here for support, because she's probably scared absolutely shitless, she did not come here for goady posters to tell her that her fiancé probably did it. How incredibly insensitive!

Equally, saying OP is scaring parents who use FT nursery? I use FT nursery for my 3yo and OP is absolutely NOT scaring me at all. In fact I find things like this useful, and I do question bruises etc that nursery don't tell me about. Like I say our nursery are pretty hot on stuff like this, as they should be but clearly, many are not.

I would also like to say that at my sons previous nursery, there was at least one member of staff who I did not trust at all, and who's childcare skills were lacking at best. I did report her but because she was a longstanding member of staff nothing happened. I don't believe that every single member of nursery staff gives excellent childcare and would have no reason to lie, the member of staff who I mention lied to me on several occasions backed up by other members of staff and parents who were present. Some people will do anything to save their own arse, even throwing an innocent parent under the bus.

I hope you get your little boy back soon op

This is inaccurate.

No, I could have put it better - as MrsBertBibby did - but people need to stop saying things which amount to “get a proper lawyer not a legal aid one.”

As she put it, much better, care proceedings and children work is a specialised area and parents routinely get legal aid in public law proceedings and so the solicitors you will access through this legal aid are the specialists.

Yes they also do direct billable work, but they also do legal aid work. They’re the same people, and they are the specialists. Saying otherwise undermines the profession and creates worry for parents where there shouldn’t be.

By all means, do research about who to instruct, but don’t listen to those who say legal aid lawyers are in any way inferior due to that.

This sounds awful. I hope it gets resolved soon.