Do you teach your teenage sons how to run a house?

[wheresmymojo]

Inspired by other threads where men seem to need instructions on 'what needs to be done'.

I also have one of these - happy to do his half and gets on with obvious things like laundry, dishwasher, hoovering.

However he would never think to do things like clean the inside of windows, dust skirting boards (actually probably dust at all), etc.

When I was growing up I was expected to help my DM around the house and she would make sure I'd not overlooked things like this. My stepbrother on the other hand was just asked to do 'outside' jobs like washing the car or bikes.

Do those of you with teenagers give proper housework chores? Not just 'take the bins out' but actually dusting and such like?

Do you give the same chores to the boys and girls or different?

Oh god I barely dust or clean windows either. My ds is probably more helpful than dd who will make someone a lousy wife

Same chores to both (one girl, one boy), they grew up seeing those things done so just got on with it when asked. They also both chipped in with helping mow the lawn or wash the cars because that was how our family worked, we did what needed doing when it needed doing regardless of historically perceived roles.

My teens don't get made to do any housework. I'm sure they are clever enough to work out how to clean the skirtings when they have their own place though, so no concerns here.

I only have boys. They share a bathroom, and look after it themselves. They do their own washing. They clear up after dinner. None of it done particularly well, but I'm not going to complain. At some point they'll realise that it's easier to do the bathroom well, than badly.

My 3 and 7 year old boys are already being taught things like this if I had girls I would do the same.

We have one left at home I come from a family where we didn't have to help much. My husband was doing his own washing by 12 and cleaning the family pub when needed. Despite this, he pampers our son and it drives me mad. I keep telling him we need to change this but it goes in one ear and out of the other.

Mine did chores from around 8.
By 16 they were expected to muck in with any jobs around the house and garden. Even dangerous stuff like chainsaws or mundane things like ordering food at a restaurant.
My Ddad taught me all sorts and it's only fair to pass it on.

I am teaching my son - basic cookery, ironing, dusting, hoovering, sorting recycling, tidying. I am not very good at much of that list but he is. Hopefully he grows into a good housemate, partner, husband...

One of my sons is brilliant housework-wise, one is the opposite.

The one who sees what needs to be done and pitches in without being asked, had a Saturday job in a restaurant (fab chef, tiny kitchen) and learned to work quickly and efficiently. I'm sure that's helped a lot.

The other one does his share when reminded but enthusiasm is sadly lacking!

Even with no instruction cleaning and running a house is not difficult.

If you can't work out how to clean a bathroom or put some washing on without being shown then that's a bit sad.

My two don't have chores and I didn't when I lived at home, but DS1 now lives away and is absolutely fine.

Absolutely, my 11 and 10 year old sons put their washing away, sort out a laundry basket if I ask them, take their sheets off, hoover and dust bedroom, they've watched me iron and I've let them have a go ( 11 yr old - actually enjoys it, although I'm still worried he will burn himself ), they put their plates away, will wash up if needed and are pretty competent in the kitchen.
It's not something I bang on to them about but, they need to realise that one day it will be them who has to organise their own lives..
Exactly the same with my daughters, they are far more untidy though! Bizarre isn't it?

I really don't want to send 13yo DS out into the world incapable of seeing dirt or mess or regarding it as someone else's job. So he is responsible for cleaning up after himself in the kitchen, and for keeping his room and his bathroom clean and tidy. He knows what clean looks like, and I check before he's allowed off the hook.

I never got taught about cleaning skirting boards etc either, it got done while we were at school as it was easier for my DM. So I am trying to get the DCs to do the less frequent things as well as the regular washing up, wiping counters, cleaning bathrooms etc.

We have two girls and two boys and they are all expected to do chores equally. The eldest boy probably does more outside/labour type jobs than the youngest girl but that is because it is more practical rather than gender specific. The boys are 18 and 17 and have to do their own washing and ironing, and are responsible for keeping their room clean and tidy.

every now and then when i get annoyed with being the housework fairy (apart from everyday chores like laying the table/doing the dishes etc) I write a big list of everything that needs doing - dusting, washing down internal doors, etc and tell everyone that they need to do stuff off the list and tick it off and keep going until its all done! they moan and try and beat each other to the easier stuff!

I get all my kids to do stuff around the house, it's bare minimum parenting surely. Two of mine are naturally tidier than the other two though.

I am teaching DS the same as DD.

They are better at seeing dust than I am. I didn't learn about skirting boards until I was in my 30s.

@55ExpletiveDEVILighted

What else comes under 'less frequent' other than skirting boards and washing curtains?

I married a man in the RAF who was far more likely to dust door frames and skirting boards than me at the beginning. We now have 2 adult sons, one in the army and the other a nurse. They've both grown up knowing how to cook, clean, wash and iron. I'm disabled, and have got gradually worse as the years have gone on, so they had no choice really.

My teenage son, can cook , clean , make beds etc
I don’t want him to be the topic of a MN thread in the future

I never had to do chores as a kid (though I would have offered to help sometimes) so I've given my son the same childhood. Now he's 16 he will (when asked) wash dishes, load dishwasher, and weed. Unasked, he will vacuum and bring his dirty dishes and glasses out of his bedroom (I've always allowed food and drink in there). He can cook a bit now too. Next lessons will be laundry and ironing. I'll probably never mention interiors of windows and skirting boards. He can make some money and outsource those.

I have DD 12 and DS15. They both do their own laundry and will hoover, dust, clean the bathroom etc. They do need to be reminded though.
I recently made DS responsible for dinner once a week. Yesterday he made a very nice curry from scratch.
My DH is not at all domesticated. I don't want my son to be like that.

We use a chart that has all chores on. Everyone does 2 a week and you may not pick the same two each week or every 2nd week.

Means everyone knows what needs to be done and how. I have at times pointed ds to less used chores but actually it is dd3 who is the worst for just cleaning the same things. Ds age 17 is pretty fair

We have a family cleaning session where everyone (including teen boy and teen girl) are expected to pitch in with what needs doing. That includes hoovering, dusting, mopping floors, general tidying, cleaning kitchen and bathroom etc. So they can both do all of those

They can also both put washing in the washing machine, hang it out to dry and manage to bring it in if it rains.
If they've been cooking in the kitchen they know to wipe the surfaces and wash up/put stuff in dishwasher.
They cook or at least prep dinner once a week. They make their own breakfasts and lunches every day.

All of these are just considered to be part and parcel of living in this house, as they are things that need doing to make it a nice space, that none of us particularly relish!

The only job that is different between the boy and girl is mowing the lawn, and that's only because DD is petite and can't physically manage to push our heavy lawnmower.

We have cleaners. My children barely know what a hoover is, let alone how to wet dust skirting boards. Their poor future life partners!