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Should my friend offer some money?

73 replies

Darkerhorse · 26/09/2019 22:38

My husband treated me to a spa day a few weeks ago and I asked my friend to come with me. At the end of the day when we were leaving, the spa said that we had both already paid and that we just had lunch left to pay for, which was a mistake on their part. My husband had paid for me beforehand and my friend still needed to pay for her spa day.

My friend said nothing and left without paying for her spa day, seeming very pleased to have saved herself £75! She then said she would treat me to something in return for her free day as opposed to offering my husband half of the money she had saved from not having to pay. I said he would probably prefer me to give him some money back but she came up with a reason as to why she actually really needed this money afterall.

She has not contacted me regarding the return treat for her free spa day, or offered any money off my day. I am quite honest and probably would have paid the fee at the time (and regretted it later!) But she has more confidence than me and walked away without paying saying "nevermind their mistake." But surely, she should atleast have offered to pay for lunch or something considering hers was completely free?!

I'm a little shocked that no offers have been made, particularly as she knows my husband paid for me? I probably won't say anything, but it has tainted my perception of her character. What do others think?

OP posts:
Wildorchidz · 26/09/2019 22:41

So she got a free spa day due to a mistake by the spa place and you think she should give £37.50 back to your husband?

SilverChime · 26/09/2019 22:42

You had already paid. They mistakenly didn’t charge her. YABU if you want her to pay you for her good fortune. If she found a tenner would you expect her to give you half?

Darkerhorse · 26/09/2019 22:42

I just think I would have offered.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 26/09/2019 22:43

You asked your friend to come? Did you make it clear she would have to pay? I wouldn’t invite someone and then expect them to pay to accompany me.

Wildorchidz · 26/09/2019 22:43

Why did you not tell them that her day was not paid for?

Soola · 26/09/2019 22:43

She owes your husband nothing.

She owes the spa the money for her day there.

I’m not sure if she paid her half of the lunch or not.

It is very off of her to be smug about not paying for her spa day.

Why didn’t you speak up at the time?

MadameButterface · 26/09/2019 22:44

She should have paid the spa, she owes them money, she doesn’t owe you anything

italianfiat · 26/09/2019 22:44

I don't understand why you think she should pay you? You didn't pay for her!

MrsNotNice · 26/09/2019 22:44

So they made a mistake and she got to have a free spa??

I think she just got lucky Confused I don’t think she owes you to pay you.

Unless your DH paid for two, expecting the money back. I don’t understand.

TwattingDog · 26/09/2019 22:44

Err, no, she shouldn't need to offer and you are being grabby. The spa are down £75 though - that's a lot of money to most businesses.

mynameisigglepiggle · 26/09/2019 22:44

But your husband had paid for you and was happy to pay for you so why should she give him half the money?

MadameButterface · 26/09/2019 22:45

She was cheeky not paying but you were also cheeky inviting someone along to keep you company and expecting them to pay for themselves

Sparklyring · 26/09/2019 22:45

Baffled as to why you think she owes you money?!

SheChoseDown · 26/09/2019 22:46

YABVU she owes you and your husband nothing. She owes the spa 75quid.
If you are bitter that she got it for free you should have done the RIGHT THING by speaking up at the time

ScreamingValenta · 26/09/2019 22:47

The idea that she owes your husband money is utter madness. It's the spa she owes, not the pair of you.

It doesn't reflect well on either of you that you didn't attempt to correct the mistake at the time.

GaudyNight · 26/09/2019 22:47

But your husband didn’t pay for her, for heaven’s sake! Or are you saying they charged him twice?

Wildorchidz · 26/09/2019 22:47

Actually the pair of you are nothing but thieves. You both knew that they made a mistake and neither of you said anything.

Darkerhorse · 26/09/2019 22:48

I felt too uncomfortable to say as I was in the middle of explaining that I had already paid, when the receptionist cut in and said we had both paid and my friend jumped in to say "yes that's right both of us." So felt I couldn't say. I guess it's because I know DH was short of cash at the time but paid for it as a gesture after he went away for a weekend. It would have been nice to have given him some money back. I couldn't afford to contribute at the time. But yes, you're actually right, she doesn't owe my husband anything at all.

OP posts:
MrsNotNice · 26/09/2019 22:49

I think if I was you I would be very embarassed to say that your husband appreciates you to pay back half..

If he got it for you as a present then he surely doesn’t expect anything.

I think you do sound very grabby and bitter Confused.

I would’ve just expected friend to insist to pay the spa..

SheChoseDown · 26/09/2019 22:50

If he didn't have the money he shouldn't have done this. And now she's saying she also doesn't have the money? Stop going on spa days!

LuluBellaBlue · 26/09/2019 22:50

Agree with others that she doesn’t owe you anything and you asking her for the money is probably why you’ve not heard from her.

I’m amazed you actually asked her to pay your husband back half.

Moralistically what she did and not speaking up / paying is another thing altogether.

Darkerhorse · 26/09/2019 22:51

She had asked me to go to the spa with her, a few weeks prior but I couldn't make it so she didnt go either, hence why I suggested she join me. DH was only ever paying for me, I was originally going alone but suggested she come along.

OP posts:
TheCatsACunt · 26/09/2019 22:51

What lovely people you and your friend are. She’s stolen from the spa, you stood back and watched her, and now you also want to profit from her dishonesty.

Awful behaviour.

Crockof · 26/09/2019 22:52

If you are short on cash wtf do you waste it on a spa day?

InsertFunnyUsername · 26/09/2019 22:53

So you have lost no money on this spa day because you were going anyway? But you expect her to offer money. She probably should have told the spa there has been a mistake but I can not see how she owes you or your husband a penny.