As woodlice are detritivores.....

[Jux]

...and if you had a carpet which had seen the kitchen accidents of many years, if you got a (very) large herd of woodlice and set them loose on the carpet, would they clean it up?

Coffeeandchocolate, I suppose if they had a good enough diet at work they might only be tempted to eat their own poo at home, as a treat perhaps? "Come on kids, daddies got some ripe poo for our supper tonight!"

@Jux I mean, it's good that you're incorporating their tendency towards cannibalism into your population modelling, but I have to ask: are you sure you can trust them? If they'll literally eat their children (or their friends' children), what makes you think they wouldn't eat you, too?

I'm not dead and rotting, nor am I fungus (yet).
I might be a bit big?
I'm their boss! They'll be far too scared of me to take a bite; I can tread on them if they rebel.