I know I’m an extreme case at 14 years....

[BertrandRussell]

......but why do so many people have children so soon after starting a relationship? I’m not advocating 13 years as standard and I know that accidents happen. But why would you choose to have a baby after only knowing someone a few months- or even a year?

My eldest was born 1 year and 9 months after I met DH.

We were financially stable, living together and I was over 30.

Plus DH is the least annoying sexiest man I have ever met, I had no reservations about starting a family with him and I still don't many years later!

Oddly we are actually both cautious and risk adverse!

Wellmy marriage didn’t wo k out but my kids did
Had em at 25, 27and 29
First grandchild at 51
I don’t want to leave them ever☹️

My friend was with her husband 15 years before they had a baby. They split up 20 months later.

I was with mine 4 months and got pregnant. We've not long split up after 17 years together.

So no happy endings for either of us regardless of how long we were together before children.

But I suspect this is just a thread to say how much better you are than me for waiting so I'll leave it there.

I dunno, our eldest was born after we’d been together 9 years and the youngest nearly 12 years. We wanted to be married first and was 6.5 years till we got married. We had work and family stuff meaning we didn’t get married sooner. I also just didn’t want to get married or have kids in my 20s.

I was 32 first pregnancy and 35 second and didn’t have any concerns at all about “time not being on my side”. Borne out by getting pregnant immediately both times!

Different people have different circumstances. Dh and I have been together 20 years this year. Our kids are 4 and 1. I didn't want children when we met at 22, he was on the fence but agreed because he wanted me more than hypothetical children at that point.

By the time we were in our mid to late 30s, he was sure he wanted me and children. I agreed to try for six months and got pregnant with dc1 straight away. Had I wanted children, we would have made different choices and probably had them within a few years of getting together. After all, we have been living together since our second date when he just moved in with me without asking (I fell over his suitcase on the way to bed).

you can really enjoy each one growing up rather than lumping the stages of each child all together.
I always thought the opposite, surely it is much more pleasurable to be doing the stages together, rather than only being able to do activities suitable for a toddler, or a teenager . That seems like a rather disjointed family life?