Hi
I'm looking for some advice on how to help my dsis. Her DH has taken out payday loans and used them to gamble. This is the second time. They are only married 18 months. Before they got married everyone begged her not to marry him. If there was a checklist for everything you would hate in a DH Amherst would tick each box.
Problem drinker
Quits jobs
Gambling
Payday loans
Dd he barely sees
Depression but stopped medication
Goes missing for days. Drinking.
Skips work to drink and lies about it. He has spent all day texting her pretending to be in work when he's in the pub.
She pays most bills and is in significant debt to pay for the wedding. All in her name.
Last time he took the payday loans he confessed to her and she went guarantor on a loan to pay them off. This was about 6 months ago. This time she opened a letter and found out about more payday loans.
How can I help her? She has lost some friends due to him and the rest are just frustrated with constantly advising her to leave and it being forgiven and forgotten again.
I'm concerned about how much she is drinking. She admits she has a problem but won't deal with it. Or can't.
It's such a toxic relationship.
I live in another country but they are both visiting this weekend. How do I deal with this? She hasn't confided in me about the latest payday loans but her friend told me today.
I want to help her but she seems unable to leave. If I'm honest I would love to tell him what I think of him.