Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Terrible kids’ behaviour on holiday - any hope to rescue this?

83 replies

DisorganisedOrganiser · 12/08/2019 16:49

On holiday with DH and kids at a very child friendly all inclusive resort. DDs are 6 and 8. Behaviour, especially from DD2 is terrible! I know it’s normal for kids to kick off a bit if they are out of routine and we are trying to have low expectations and not put pressure on.

They like the pools.

But... it is too hot for them to be in the pools in the midday sun so they need to do something else during this time.

They are bickering almost constantly. They are sharing a double bed which has never been a problem before but DD1 absolutely hates it so we are splitting them up at night and each sleeping with one of them. DD2 has cried and whinged since before we left the airport in the UK. They are hitting and punching each other. Constantly asking for sweets. DD2 wants the lights off and curtains drawn all the time which is irritating everyone. DD1 keeps saying she wants ‘time to herself’ which she is getting but it is apparently not enough. They refuse kids clubs (not a problem, we expected this) but DD1 has decided she is now too old for the mini disco. Evening entertainment is shit and in very hot and stuffy room. Did the same style holiday last year but the evenings were cooler as entertainment outside and both kids loved the disco then. Internet is shit so not even sure I will be able to reply much to this thread if I get any replies. Aaaaggh. Any tips?

OP posts:
Original poster
DisorganisedOrganiser · 12/08/2019 16:50

Should also say they complain the beach is too sandy Hmm

OP posts:
thewinkingprawn · 12/08/2019 16:54

No but am watching with interest and solidarity - mine are DD9, DD7and DS4. Hideous bickering, rudeness and general horrible behaviour. I told them i’d Rather be in work earlier which shot them up momentarily.

TreacherousPissFlap · 12/08/2019 16:57

I would take them home (at least I would threaten to take them home)

An age appropriate discussion about how lucky he is to be on holiday and how selfish his behaviour is normally did it for DS, who was a horror for being out of routine (and the beaches we went to were also too sandy Hmm)

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Kokeshi123 · 12/08/2019 17:02

You are not alone, kids can be little shits on holiday!

If the evening entertainment is just not fun, I would just not do it, honestly. Just wind down in the hotel room and have early nights (perhaps you can read a book with the light turned down low, for a while?), then get up early in the morning so that they can get in the pool early while it is cool and have lots of time there, which will tire them out.

If they are behaving like little ticks and are unpleasant to be around, I would put them in kids' club whether they like it or not.

Original poster
DisorganisedOrganiser · 12/08/2019 17:15

thewinkingprawn I would totally rather be in work!

Kokeshi, I think we may have to accept that with the evening stuff. DD2 wants to watch it but even she lost interest last night as it was so awful.

Treacherous, I try to have age appropriate discussions constantly. They have no effect. Even in daily life they are so ungrateful. I’m in a job where I see life and death and the sheer ungratefulness of kids is one of the hardest parts of parenting for me, even though it’s normal. Can’t go home early as it would cost a fortune. Plus my parents gave money for he cost of this holiday and they would go batshit if we came back early.

The kids clubs are so terrible I really can’t bring myself to put them in. We didn’t choose the place based on the kids clubs as they normally don’t want to do them. Usually it’s not a problem as they get along (with the odd bit of normal sibling bickering of course)!

OP posts:
RedCrab · 12/08/2019 17:19

I don’t know if this would help but I went abroad a lot as a kid - even we’ll into age 8 or 9, around midday my mum would insist we had a nap (siesta) and then we would spend the evenings exploring the town/ eating dinner/ shopping / going to the beach in the evening. It’s one of my favourite memories of being on holiday. How you get them to nap, I don’t know but my mum did somehow - just got us to lie down in bed and eventually we fell asleep for a few hours. Went back to the pool around 3/4 until 6/7 and then out until 10.

Butterymuffin · 12/08/2019 17:19

If the kids' clubs are terrible (but hopefully not actually dangerous) I would threaten to put them in if they can't stop bickering.

FuriousVexation · 12/08/2019 17:22

Go home as soon as you can and don't ever plan to take them overseas (or anywhere more than a 1hr drive) again

StitchingMoss · 12/08/2019 17:23

We always get our kids to bed at a fairly normal time on holiday and it makes the world of difference. Never have a problem with behaviour.

I think a lot of kids bad behaviour on holiday is down to tiredness. Works for us.

Original poster
DisorganisedOrganiser · 12/08/2019 17:24

Good idea to threaten them with kids club anyway! RedCrab, we have tried that a bit but maybe not enough.

We are definitely reconsidering future holidays. The weird thing is we did an AI holiday last year and it was awesome Confused.

OP posts:
averythinline · 12/08/2019 17:27

do you try the siesta at lunchtme - DS wouldnt nap over teh age of 2 but would rest in fromt of movie/tv for couple of hours at the hotest. part of teh day then do later eves..

or split up and do different things with them individually..

go exploring the local area are there any musums/castles/galleries you can go to (indoor so out of sun).... I;m not a fan of hotels as hate being stuck in rooms esp with DC! too on top of each other....

BooksAreMyOnlyFriends · 12/08/2019 17:28

I agree with naps. When we did similar holidays when dcs were young we all napped after lunch for at least a couple of hours. It took a few days to get into it though. It broke the day up gave us a rest from each other and then we had long evenings and later mornings.

averythinline · 12/08/2019 17:29

or markets - a mooch around a local market/fiesta ?
or any external activities to try..
sound like a bit stir crazy if the activities arent that great on site.....

Chitarra · 12/08/2019 17:31

Agree with letting them stay up late (if they behave - obviously not if they start fighting) and making up for the lost sleep with a nap in the hottest part of the day.

Skittlenommer · 12/08/2019 17:32

It baffles me that people attempt ‘holidays’ with kids! It’s not a holiday for you it’s just the same old hard work but you’ve paid to do it in a different place!

Next time leave them at home and have yourselves a proper good time!!

Troels · 12/08/2019 17:33

When Sis and I did this stuff on holiday we went every year to Spain She sat us on a chair (or on the floor) at each end of the room and made us sit quiet Not able to see and look at each other. She'd also threatened us with staying with the hotel babysitter instead of going out with the adults for dinner. She would then lie on the bed and read for a while before asking if we were finished acting silly and ready to go out yet? If one of us said No, she went back to reading. sis tried it

BlueSkiesLies · 12/08/2019 17:35

There sometimes can be a lot of pressure to enjoy holidays as the best thing ever which wan be a bit stressful for children.

Hitting and punching each other? I’d go zero tolerance on that and keep them separated. You and DH are going to have to take one child each and tag team.

Can you have STRONG WORDS with them about their behaviour and expectations?

Lunchtimes when it’s too hot out - put on a film or something in the room?

Evenings - eat then go for a night time beach walk and get them to bed. Sack off the entertainment if people aren’t enjoying it.

Get up early when it’s cooler and tire them out.

Ignore their moaning and put them in kids club for a couple of hours a day. You and DH deserve a break too.

Charles11 · 12/08/2019 17:40

I have the same problem but what I find helps mine is sleep, minimal junk food and doing something that requires some focus and brain power.
I know that sounds strange but getting them to read a book, go on a homework app, visit a museum to learn about something seems to keep them calm, or go out and see some interesting places.

BlankTimes · 12/08/2019 17:41

so we are splitting them up at night and each sleeping with one of them

Is there any spare bedding there? Roll up a sheet or blanket or use spare pillows to make a barrier down the middle of the double bed.

Puddlet · 12/08/2019 17:42

Doing things separately sounds great.
Perhaps they are too sheltered to be grateful? My kids school is great for helping them understand that not everyone is well off - they do foodbank and hamper collections. We do live in a grotty northern town so I suppose that has an impact.
Also if there's are some suitable church activities near home it might be worth a try - it helps if the messages you want them to pick up about gratitude and thinking of others come from other people as well as from you.
In the mean time much sympathy and hope for a turnaround!

AnkleWarmersAndPixieBoots · 12/08/2019 17:47

Although I'd give anything for a holiday like this, my dds don't enjoy them and prefer holidays in the UK at Haven, or similar (bloody philistines!) and spend loads of time in the indoor pool and arcades.

PamelaTodd · 12/08/2019 17:55

A siesta is essential imo on sun holidays. If they really can’t sleep they can lie quietly with a book.

I find that we need to establish some sort of routine on holidays or it is just hellish. Ours is just breakfast - swim - lunch - siesta - evening activity - dinner - walk - shower - bed - wine.

A certain amount of slippage is normal and we usually have a few stern talks about gratitude and privilege and good manners.

PamelaTodd · 12/08/2019 18:00

About the too sandy beach Grin, I carry a sachet of saline in my pocket in case of sand in eyes. Talc is great for getting sand off feet. One of mine wears neoprene shoes in the water.

Original poster
DisorganisedOrganiser · 12/08/2019 18:08

Thanks all, lots of tips which I will read. Just about to go in for dinner. It doesn’t start til 7 which I don’t think is helping matters as they are starving by 6. They are eating so much shit already that I can’t bring myself to get them crisps, chips etc from the pool bar at 5 ish. I am NOT strict about diet but they have been eating absolute rubbish even with us limiting it

OP posts:
downbutnotout2018 · 12/08/2019 18:12

Strongly cajole them into kids clubs to give yourself a rest. They can't knock it til they've tried it. That's what I did this year when the bickering got too much. Don't give them a choice. Just book them in..... And sit by the pool with a giant cocktail and book.