Terrible kids’ behaviour on holiday - any hope to rescue this?

[DisorganisedOrganiser]

On holiday with DH and kids at a very child friendly all inclusive resort. DDs are 6 and 8. Behaviour, especially from DD2 is terrible! I know it’s normal for kids to kick off a bit if they are out of routine and we are trying to have low expectations and not put pressure on.

They like the pools.

But... it is too hot for them to be in the pools in the midday sun so they need to do something else during this time.

They are bickering almost constantly. They are sharing a double bed which has never been a problem before but DD1 absolutely hates it so we are splitting them up at night and each sleeping with one of them. DD2 has cried and whinged since before we left the airport in the UK. They are hitting and punching each other. Constantly asking for sweets. DD2 wants the lights off and curtains drawn all the time which is irritating everyone. DD1 keeps saying she wants ‘time to herself’ which she is getting but it is apparently not enough. They refuse kids clubs (not a problem, we expected this) but DD1 has decided she is now too old for the mini disco. Evening entertainment is shit and in very hot and stuffy room. Did the same style holiday last year but the evenings were cooler as entertainment outside and both kids loved the disco then. Internet is shit so not even sure I will be able to reply much to this thread if I get any replies. Aaaaggh. Any tips?

And this is why we go to a self-catering holiday cottage in the middle of England, in the middle of a massive open space ideal for kids to play out in, has all the mod-cons you’d have at home Netflix, washing machine, walk-in shower, two bedrooms, blackout blinds and breakfast at the main house upon request. It’s not hot, it’s kid friendly and we enjoy ourselves. It costs us less than haven and we can get a babysitter.

My kids want to go to Spain but they wilt in the sun and are like springer spaniels and would go mad cooped up by a beach/hotel all day. I have decided we’ll go on considerably cheaper foreign jaunts as a couple when the kids are older and out of term time. Some kids cope fine, mine not so much.

You have to learn to enjoy a different kind of holiday for a while.

Yep, whilst they are being pains then Kids Club is non-negotiable. Remember (and tell them) that this is YOUR holiday too.

Go buy some fruit (or get it from the morning buffet) to counter the eating shite issue.

Is it really too hot to be out midday? Rash vests and hats should counter that.

That's part of the problem then, too much sugar and empty food, fizzy drinks will make anyone feel crap

We always take board games and cards on holiday and sit ourselves at a table near the back where we can see the entertainment but do our own thing. We often end up with lots of other kids at our table with my DH teaching them new games. I think they get a bit fed up with the hotel entertainment unless it's amazing.

We also usually have a night or two where we go out to eat somewhere different and have a walk along the beach side shops mooching at the souvenirs and stopping for a drink every so often to break things up.

Have they made any other friends around the pool? That might help so they are out of each others hair for a bit.

I sympathise. DS2 (4) was really tricky on holiday. The kids club was awful, which didn't bother me but their evening entertainment was awful and dinner was also at 7pm which was too late. To save our sanity we ate out a few times so we could eat a bit earlier but I resented having to do that because of the additional cost. We also had a routine: breakfast - pool/beach/shop/explore- quiet time infront of TV- shower-dinner-walk after dinner. He was tired as well as he found it hard to sleep then we had to get up early for breakfast
Next year we are self catering..

Have you got pool toys or can you buy some? If you can wear them out with games (races, duck diving, who can do handstands etc) in the pool in the morning, then impose a siesta (quiet reading / tablet) that would get you through until mid afternoon. Then maybe you could go out for ice-cream while it’s still very hot and get some fruit / bread rolls while you’re out. Back to the pool for the end of the afternoon, and give them the rolls / fruit about 5.00 to hold them until super at 7.00.

I’d also be clear that anyone who bickered or started an argument would be either in kids club (if you think you can force them there) or in the room with me reading and being boring the next morning, while their sibling enjoyed the pool. You’d probably only have to actually carry out the threat once.

Wow thanks so much for all responses.

To answer a few questions...

They really cannot be out in the midday sun in the pool. They have rash vests and are wearing them (wish I had got one for myself!) but refuse to wear hats in the pool. So no hat, no swimming in midday heat. To be fair to them hats just don’t stay on down waterslides etc.

The dinner at 7 is a problem and definitely lesson learned for next time. Didn’t even think to check meal times but it is far too late for us. I really resent paying to eat out when all inclusive so we will have to suck it up.

Pool toys... we have bought some more today so hopefully that will help.

I know early bedtimes might help but frankly the best bit of holidays is not having to do the pissing Groundhog Day bedtime routine and actually getting a lie in each morning. Also a drink at the bar is a sanity saver, even if it’s a soft drink.

From today we have said no fizzy drinks until teatime. We are already only buying / getting one ice cream a day outside mealtimes but even then the amount of chocolate sauce / pancakes / general shit is obscene even with us limiting it to mealtimes.

Apologies to anyone I ignored, am hiding in the room doing laundry while DH has the kids at the disco so I must go back and rescue him! Also my drink is waiting.

I think sugar, late nights and boredom is your problem. Have you got a rental car? Get out and about in morning, eat out at lunch (decent meal) and then they can sleep on way back, swim late afternoon. Quickest dinner at 7 and then straight into bed. I keep mine in strict routine on holidays otherwise the wheels come off.

I’m currently on holiday with my 10 year old and my mum. At various points in the last 2 days I did question whether I’d survive jail if I drowned one or both of my. My DS did ok as long as your doing exactly what he wants. He is unbearable otherwise. Doesn’t help that I said no to an item that cost 125 euros today then grab said he could have it. Huge row in the middle of the shop then I walked away. I too though my son would have a great time but I can’t deal with the ungratefulness either.

Huge sympathy back . At this point I don’t expect huge amounts of gratitude. Just not to act like spoilt brats would be fine. I wonder if some of it is that they are on holiday so they do genuinely think they should be doing exactly what they want at all times.

I think part of the problem with the evening stuff is that to see it at all you have to be in the bar area which is very loud and hot. It is just ridiculously loud. We have cards but can’t even hear each other to play them.

They haven’t made any friends in the pool . Funny that. Although to be fair in the pool they have been mostly ok.

Mine are springer spaniels yes.

I absolutely will not do proper self catering or camping. It is just more work than being at home. Although seriously debating Center parks. They have unlimited energy and to be fair often don’t go to sleep until 9 at home anyway.

Oh I do love MN when everyone is so honest 'survive jail if drowning one of mu kids' 😂
We've all been there, I also agree with siesta and I'd make them go to kids club then they might make friends and that can help stop the bickering.
Also suggest as you are AI a glass of wine at 45 minute intervals starting from 10am, the secret being to not get drunk but maintain a slightly pissed level all day which makes coping better.

Alarmclock, I am not a great daytime drinker and would just end up with a blinding headache sadly

Hi Op

Sympathy I recently did a similar holiday with my two DSs very similar ages ( and in a single parent so just me!).

I’m sure you have thought of this but if you are AI could they not have a really big snack at 4 ish? Our dinner was 7.30 and with the swimming my two just couldn’t wait - so I started giving them a hot dog or something at 4 which kept them going.

Also have to confess I did tablets after lunch in the room for at least an hour when too hot! And an hour and a half of kids club

Are you all in one room? If you can next time, get an apartment in a hotel (we went to one in Portugal) so you can have separate rooms, a kitchen for kids supper but all the facilities of the hotel. Or just Center Parcs. But it does make it more expensive.

I suggested dive toys as playing ‘fetch’ with those in the deep end of a 3m pool for an hour or so each day was what I ended up doing to wear out dd1. She misses her sports training in the holidays, and needs something to replace it, otherwise her behaviour nosedives. Now she’s older I get her to do lengths of butterfly, as that’s really tiring.

Also suggest as you are AI a glass of wine at 45 minute intervals starting from 10am, the secret being to not get drunk but maintain a slightly pissed level all day which makes coping better.

@Alarmclockstop 😂🍷Brilliant!

BlankTimes, there is spare bedding which we have rolled up but not enough. DD1 still kicked DD2 through it. To be fair DD2 was being so incredibly annoying I couldn’t blame DD1, not that I told her that or condone violence!

Centre Parcs is amazing. Breakfast in the villa - pool all day - take snacks but buy food there as well so you don't have to make a full pack up. Back to villa - easy tea at villa or meal at one of the restaurants. We ate at villa as cheaper! Bike ride after tea if still tired then bed - and chill with a glass or 2 of wine. Do a couple of the activities but as they are ££££ I always make sure the swimming is the main activity. Flipping loved Centre Parcs for family holidays.

Bigmouse, I think we will have to do a snack yes. Hadn’t been as it was just more junk but I guess it’s junk they won’t eat later... maybe.

Behind... thankfully we are in two rooms so are separating them all most of the time. Yes I think they are missing sports etc. They normally do activities, dancing etc as they are impossible to manage without structured exercise.

Amazingly as I have been writing this DD1 has made some friends and they are playing together . Frustratingly DD2 has already gone to bed so she is missing out and I might have to spend all day tomorrow stopping DD1 rubbing it in. Plus the entertainment is actually ok tonight. Bloody hell.

I’d put them in kids club for just 1 hour in the morning. Do they have a timetable? Pick a time when they’re doing an art/craft activity.

Couple of hours in the pool.

Lunch: have you taken Uno/Dobble? We play at the table.

Back to room for movie/stroll to village/bus to town with €3 to buy crap

Pool/ beach and ice cream time

Back to room for cartoons and change for dinner. Go to shop and buy some TUC biscuits/fruit or something similar to nibble and stave of rumbling tummy until 7

If the evening entertainment is crap go out and find a bar; if you’re in Greece find one that does plate smashing and join in.

Two tips for the future: take a big box of assorted Lego it’s catnip for all kids and they’ll make friends as the others wander up

Take board games: set up Frustration under an umbrella and other kids will join in.

It’s two weeks; let them fill their boots with crap to eat.

Now DS is watching football after making me come down to the bar. I was happy watching friends lol. My mums gone to sleep. No one will drown today! I’ve only got one. Maybe he will make some friends x

We split dds up at nighttime. Dd1 will go to sleep first, usually there’s a few extra pillows or some sort of bolster to divide them. That’s his they get to sleep. And yes, if they’re ott they get pulled up on it. We sometimes split them up and do activities separately too.
We have one dc each on the plane, we don’t sit them together otherwise they’ll argue and pester one another.
Also, we make sure they don’t always eat the kid ‘friendly’ meals as they’re junky. I’ll monitor their food to make sure they get plenty of veg and fruit and aren’t just eating crap.
Hope their behaviour improves 🌞

Are you me?!? We've just returned from Disneyland and they've been a total nightmare.

Can you ask reception if they have any camp beds or even a roll up mattress. Put one of them to sleep on the floor. Try to make it seem like camping in the wild, to the youngest.

Oh God Hetty, I think that is worse going somewhere like Disney for them to be a nightmare. Although thinking about it I remember being a total nightmare at Disney as an older child. Not entirely sure why

I’m seconding/thirding etc.. the tiredness - it makes most adults cranky lol

The heat makes you even more lethargic - can they have a later night to bed, an early rise (pool after breakfast) and then a nap 11-1pm they’ll be tired by then due to the late night/early rise and will make up sleep with the nap.... good luck!