Terrible kids’ behaviour on holiday - any hope to rescue this?

[DisorganisedOrganiser]

On holiday with DH and kids at a very child friendly all inclusive resort. DDs are 6 and 8. Behaviour, especially from DD2 is terrible! I know it’s normal for kids to kick off a bit if they are out of routine and we are trying to have low expectations and not put pressure on.

They like the pools.

But... it is too hot for them to be in the pools in the midday sun so they need to do something else during this time.

They are bickering almost constantly. They are sharing a double bed which has never been a problem before but DD1 absolutely hates it so we are splitting them up at night and each sleeping with one of them. DD2 has cried and whinged since before we left the airport in the UK. They are hitting and punching each other. Constantly asking for sweets. DD2 wants the lights off and curtains drawn all the time which is irritating everyone. DD1 keeps saying she wants ‘time to herself’ which she is getting but it is apparently not enough. They refuse kids clubs (not a problem, we expected this) but DD1 has decided she is now too old for the mini disco. Evening entertainment is shit and in very hot and stuffy room. Did the same style holiday last year but the evenings were cooler as entertainment outside and both kids loved the disco then. Internet is shit so not even sure I will be able to reply much to this thread if I get any replies. Aaaaggh. Any tips?

We've had a bad day today, I don't mind late nights on holiday because mine properly sleep in (10.30am today for the 6yo) but yes squabbling, tantrums over nothing, constantly arguing back. Hoping tomorrow is a better day

Hi OP. Holidays seem to bring out the worst in kids sometimes, which is so frustrating when you’ve been looking forward to nice family time.

I’d the evening entertainment is rubbish, could you go for a walk in the evenings around your resort? Maybe find another bar that has some sort of entertainment? You could even get your DDs to do karaoke if there’s a song they both know?

One other thing I don't think I've seen mentioned... Dehydration makes childrens behaviour awful! And I imagine that if you are somewhere hot then they are both at least a bit dehydrated. Not sure how you up their water but bribary is probably your best bet ;-)

Good point about dehydration! They are almost certainly not drinking enough. Will do better with that tomorrow.

Amazingly things have improved even if only temporarily. Decided to bite the bullet and have brought DD2 back down. She loves the show .

Solidarity to everyone else having shit holidays.

We found the kids disco & entertainment a bit overwhelming for my DD and her friend during hols (they are 7) they enjoyed sitting outside in the evening playing Dobble and Uno and card games like snap or scabby queen. I thought they would be well up for disco but a bit of relaxing time seemed to go down well.

Mine have been a nightmare today and we haven’t even gone anywhere yet!

We went to the pool for about 45mins to 1hr at a time then came back to our apartment for a drink/snack (self catering) bit of tv/cards/book/board game/puzzle book then played in the garden/playground then back to pool etc

Some early nights, some late nights & naps whenever possible!

For starters, get them to drink plenty of water, don't let them eat crap all day. Deal with bad behaviour as firmly as you would at home, don't cajole and let them off because they're on holiday. They shouldn't get taken out and treated to things if they are behaving like ungrateful brats when you've spent a lot of money on a holiday for them. It might not be fun to lay down the law, but you'll be doing yourself a favour in the long run when they realise they need to behave if they want to enjoy their holiday.

This sounds horrendous. We do self catering for a week with dish washer-cereal breakfast, sandwich lunch and posh ready meal from marks! Overall cost probably half and can spend money on decent ready meals. Also usually do two or three long weekend type breaks so no getting too bored and not too much packing/washing.

In the uk I should add, with good play park near by, good clothing and lots of outdoor space.

I would let them each fall asleep in separate beds and then move one of them into the other bed once they are asleep. That way no kicking/ bickering and you get to sleep together.

Are they getting to bed on time? My pair are a nightmare if tired. Last year on holiday we decided on one night, bed early (the same time they would teem time), one night slightly later

We're off later this week for 2 weeks, part of me is dreading it for the reasons you've put in your op

Look at what they are eating and drinking. My kids behave really badly on certain types of drinks for example. Usually the cheap ones!

When DS is unbearable (like last week when we were also on holiday...) we dose him with calpol and make him drink a ton as its usually driven by him feeling under the weather or dehydrated.

Can you get hold of a mix of snacks with some protein in there to try and balance them out a bit (might be difficult in an AI) we find without it, DS spends most of his time a) hungry and then b) cranky

If you can find a pool noodle, shove it down the middle of the bed which will create a barrier so god forbid no-ones leg etc goes on the other side of the bed!

Maybe try bribery with fancy drinks like mocktails? Something different that isn't food? Alternatively just roll with the food if that's easier and bribe with treats.

I would threaten and put them in kids club. They might make friends and you get a break too. Does it run inside? Potentially book over midday if so?

Check the double isn't two singles zipped together. If so ask if the hotel can change to twin beds. Different bedtimes can work well so one is already asleep.

Good luck OP, hope things improve.

This thread is making me feel much better - nice to know I’m not alone (currently on holiday in Mallorca with me two boys age 6 and 4).

I think for my two it’s a combo of being tired, hot and overwhelmed by all the new sights, activities and temptations (ie constantly begging for shitty toys outside every shop we pass). We are now on day 5 of 10 and things are getting easier. What’s helped us:

• trying to establish a bit of a routine which includes a good solid 2 hours of downtime/nap time (for the younger one) in the air conditioned room in the early afternoon
• so breakfast around 9, then into pool from 10-12 (or beach, or water park or whatever) and then lunch, then back to the room, curtains drawn everyone watches a film on Netflix (kids) or reads a book (us - bliss!). Normally after 40 mins of watching a film with give the little one his cuddly rabbit and tell him to “just try and close his eyes” and he will normally zonk our for an hour
• then around 3 or 4 either back into the pool for a couple of hours or we will go on a little trip in our hire care (drive over the mountains to explore another little town or on a bad day just to Lidl to buy more water (and beer!) for the room
• then walk into town for dinner around 7
• back to hotel by 9, let them run around the pool area whilst we have a nightcap!
• then kids in bed by 10

The 2 hours in a dark cool room watching a film really is the essential part of the day. The other bits can be changed and switched around but this is set is stone for us!

Also means I get to READ NOVELS for the first time since the flipping London Olympics. So that’s a benefit.

They will be hungrier and thirstier than usual. We're a bit more relaxed with fizzy drinks and snacks on holiday. Sometimes a toasted sandwich and a coke at 3pm is what they need. And definitely non negotiable naps. You can even nap on a lounger in the shade plus making a tent with a throw (not a big thick towel) if the room is too hot.

Do you have a plan for the day?

When mine were that age I'd always tell them what was happening so they knew timings and what was expected. Can they do kids club for short periods of time so shove them in but they know they'll only be there an hour.

I'd also go 0 tolerance and take them back to the room to do nothing if they bicker, when mine bicker it drives me mad!

Glad you aren't threatening going home as was suggested, bloody hate threatening things which you can't go through with, the children just know you've lost it if you get to that stage and gain all the power!

Good luck!

Thanks all, we went for a mooch round the shops this morning, then indoor pool and now in outside pool. Bit cooler today which has helped. Don’t know if we can face doing this next year... it is such an appalling waste of money.

Have high hopes for the show tonight though so we are planning to be ready early for it.

Last night was much, much better as the show was singing and dancing and the kids absolutely loved it .

Today mine are bored.....bored!!!! They are sat in the bar area on devices and I'm laid in the sun. We're only 5 days into a fortnight. Ffs.....
Early nights and out to the beach tomorrow.

It’s baffling isn’t it. I usually have sympathy for boredom but there are 4 swimming pools .

Kids club. Kids club. Kids club.

I would insist on it for one day at least. Hopefully they might even -not hate it- enjoy it.

@doyoureallyneedtoask is completely right.

If my dc were behaving terribly, I'd want to seriously deal with the behaviour myself, rather than dumping them in kids' club and letting someone else deal with it.

Well... no, I wouldn't want to, but it's what I would do. They need to learn to cooperate and behave!

It’s hard to start coming down hard on the kids when on holiday as well as being exhausting.

If it has got to the point that the OP wants to return home rather than stick it out, put them in the kid’s club. They aren’t having a good time anyway! At least the parents might as well get a few hours every day without acting like a referee.

You can start punishing and rewarding behaviour when you are home and you have more space and a schedule.