Mortified - what do you mean if you say someone "looks well"?

[munemema]

I say it a lot. And I mean what it says, a genuine compliment.

I might mean that they seem happier or less tired than usual or that the haircut/make up suits them but I haven't been able to put my finger on the change, maybe they've lost some weight and their clothes fit better or perhaps they have a bit more colour in their cheeks.

Someone has just told me it's a universal euphemism for "you've gained weight"

But in a good way, looking rested and healthier.

To me, well=healthy. So that's what I'd mean.

My great-aunt always used to say "ooh, you look happier!" when she saw me. She was right, I did. But I'd also put a bit of weight on (lifelong ED), and had gotten rid of my ex (with his cheating, lying, gaslighting ways!).

At first, I was a bit about the whole comment, but then I realised that my great-aunt genuinely loved me and was thrilled to look at me and see someone who'd taken control of their own destiny. It's a compliment. You're right. If someone takes it the wrong way, then I think that says more about them than it does about you, OP.

It means wow you have piled on the chub OR you have lain outside in the sun too long and look like a lobster

I say it to patients who I know have been in hospital or if they are seriously unwell I will say "lovely to see you out and about". I have never thought I could be telling them they look fat.

It means you look 'well' - not ill, not like death, not pale and sickly, just healthy and alive. If I want you to know I think you look fat I'll say 'you look fat' or 'you've put on weight'. (Actually I wouldn't say anything because it's not complimentary and you wouldn't want me to tell you something you likely already knew)

When I say it I am usually speaking to someone I haven't seen in a while who looks good. I mean it genuinely.

I know that some people say it means you've put on weight. My mum often says to me "you look very healthy" and what she means is "you look fat". She can be cruel...

It simply means you look well. If my MIL were still alive, she'd say, "You've put weight on," and be astonished that you found it annoying.

@WatchingTheWheels85 glad you confirmed someone older had said it as i remember an older aunty saying it to me when i was younger and had definitely put weight on but i dont think she meant it as an insult she said (in front of me but to my mum) 'she's looking well, a bit of weight suits her!' so maybe that is where i took the meaning from but i do know lots of people take it the same so personally would never say it

It’s a fairly well known phrase that can mean ‘you look like you’ve put on a bit of weight.’ It’s certainly not a new, MN or internet thing. My parents and grandparents used it jokingly from at least the 1950s.

Depends on the tone (and the person - you know some people say it with that glint in their eye and it's not a compliment)

Others it clearly just means they think you look nice.

There's no way I'd ever allude to someone looking fat - if I tell you you're looking well then you're looking well. I probably use it more if someone has been having a difficult time and usually tell people they look lovely

I’d always say it with kindness. As would all of my friends. After a holiday, sun tanned, rested and relaxed.

Really wouldn’t want anyone in my life that was so passive aggressive as to mean anything else by it.

I have to confess that I panic it means I look chubby BUT I am totally aware it's my ex anorexic brain being a dick, and that actually people just mean I look nice! So I try to be mindful of that and learn to accept the compliment :)

absolutely urbanlife (you're looking well, by the way)

So weird - I only ever use it to mean the opposite, that someone has lost weight, or just that they look really glowing or something. The only time I've ever seen or heard the other meaning is here on MN!

Not read all the thread. I got plenty of genuine "you're looking well" comments when I started to successfully LOSE weight, not when it went back on ... And that's how I'd use it.

I say it and I mean 'you look nice'. Usually if the person is looking natural / fresh / healthy, not glammed up.

Would never use it to suggest someone was looking fat.

I had it said to me a lot after I'd lost a lot of weight. So I don't think it can mean that! Not round here, anyway.

I only even say it if I mean the person LOOKS WELL.

Just fucking 'WELL' like the definition from the dictionary states:

"in good health; free or recovered from illness"

Not WELL FAT

Not WELL FED

Not WELL CHUBBY

Who in their right mind would say that to someone knowing they are being an arsehole and insulting them about their weight?

Answer: A horrible 'mean girl' type would, that's who. Sad fuckers

I would presume it meant that you think they look well. Healthy, happy, content etc. I use it and I’m never offended if someone says it to me.

I used to think that it meant someone looked fat/ like they’ve put on weight but now I don’t. I use it myself and I don’t mean that someone has put on weight when I say it.

To all the people who say it’s well known to mean “you’re fat” are you actually reading the thread, because it’s clear you are in a minority. I think it must be regional. I’m going to guess northwest England based on the fact that it’s the kind of passive aggressive dig my MIL and her mother would use.

Totally what Frogsaremean said. "You look well" means you look happy and healthy. Why would it mean fat?

To all the people who say it’s well known to mean “you’re fat” are you actually reading the thread, because it’s clear you are in a minority. I think it must be regional. I’m going to guess northwest England based on the fact that it’s the kind of passive aggressive dig my MIL and her mother would use
I'm from NW England and when I and others Say you look well we mean that they, well, look well.
Someone may have put a bit of weight on, someone else could have lost it but it's not a weight issue. It's about how good, happy or nice they are looking.
It's not a veiled insult!