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Original poster

Asking Husbands work for annual leave on his behalf

78 replies

Freespirit24 · 08/07/2019 12:09

I am asking for honest but kind advice here, please.

I am planning a surprise holiday for my husband for his 40th Birthday. Doing it as a surprise because I have NEVER been able to surprise him our whole relationship, he always finds out, and I am determined not to slip up this time.

I am wondering if it is acceptable to contact his manager, work or HR department and explain the surprise and ask if they can book time off for him (it is one-weekend Saturday and Sunday).

If I ask him to book the dates off so close to his Birthday, he will know something is up, guess as he always does and the big surprise reveal will be ruined. His manager's number is on his phone, or I could call and speak to the HR department or put it in writing to the HR department.

OP posts:

Winterfellismyhome · 08/07/2019 12:13

Sorry but i dont think this is very professional. At my work we need to submit written requests and they need to be signed. Hope you manage a way to do it

DateBanana · 08/07/2019 12:13

I wouldn't.

caffeinebuzz · 08/07/2019 12:15

Unless you know his manager socially, which it doesn't sound like you do, then I think this is unprofessional.

winepls · 08/07/2019 12:15

I absolutely would ask. The worst they will do is say no. Good luck!

milienhaus · 08/07/2019 12:17

Do you know a colleague who could do it on his behalf? Depends where he works but often procedures for getting annual leave approved are complicated and need some insider knowledge!

RollOnSummerBreak · 08/07/2019 12:18

Mt. Old company did this.. In fact after a few husband or wife Requests
Was always OK. Don't know unless you ask.

MrsMiggins37 · 08/07/2019 12:19

I’ve known people do this, where it’s going to be for a surprise I think it’s fine.

Magmatic80 · 08/07/2019 12:19

I’d totally ask! I don’t see why it’s unprofessional. You’re only asking, not telling. I wouldn’t call the manager from the number on his phone though, I’d go via their HR department which you should be able to find by looking at job vacancies.

Ace! Hope it works out and you get to surprise him!

CherryPlum · 08/07/2019 12:19

Not something I would do. In terms of his work, what if he plans to get certain things done on those days? For me it would muck up my planning if I was suddenly on leave with no prior notice.

I also think it's a bit unprofessional.

Original poster

Freespirit24 · 08/07/2019 12:20

@milienhaus

In the past, he has just had to ask his manager and she has put the days in for him without any problem really.

I understand what everyone is saying, I was confused about this and why I asked.

I do not know any of his colleagues as he is not friends with anyone outside of work, I just know of them all and hear about all the work gossip. He doesn't work in a high managers role where certain clients or work will be at stake if he is off, he is actually going part-time soon for his masters so is it really just one weekend he will need off.

OP posts:

Sandybval · 08/07/2019 12:22

No way! Can you make up a mundane excuse that may be semi believable? Or just say you want to do something low-key just you and him.

sar302 · 08/07/2019 12:22

If my husband did it for me, I would appreciate the gesture, but the not the practicality. I sometimes had meetings booked months in advance and carefully planned my annual leave, to the hour! Can't you wait til he has some time off anyway, and then whisk him away?

Nesssie · 08/07/2019 12:22

I don't think its unprofessional, explain you are looking to book a surprise holiday for his birthday, and wondered if they could approve an A/L request.

You may have to compromise and tell him a day or two before you go so that he has time to finish up or delegate any projects etc

BobTheFishermansWife · 08/07/2019 12:22

I would and have done it previously, if you explain it most managers are quite receptive. My only worry would be if they have a team calendar so he would see he has annual leave booked and question it.

Tadpoletofrog · 08/07/2019 12:24

I wouldn’t want a holiday sprung upon me, however nice the intentions.

We also have to book annual leave on our internal systems. I’m not sure how it could be done by someone else, short of hacking in to the persons account. We get email confirmation of any bookings too, so unless the manager agrees to bypass the whole booking process I can’t see how it could be done.

HollyBollyBooBoo · 08/07/2019 12:24

It would work fine within my team, we all know each other's partners etc. I'd contract his manager.

TheFlis12345 · 08/07/2019 12:26

Does he have the type of job where he would need to hand projects over to other people or can someone else just pick up his workload on the day? If the latter then absolutely do it.

I know several people who have done this and it has never been viewed as remotely unprofessional, just a lovely thing to do.

Wixi · 08/07/2019 12:29

I worked somewhere where a girls mother booked 2 days leave for her without her knowledge to take her away for her 21st birthday. The company were fine with it and kept it secret from her. They signed her leave form on her return!

Knittedfairies · 08/07/2019 12:34

I don't think I could do that, but I wonder if you could ask your husband to book that weekend off, giving him some other lower level birthday celebration as an excuse? Lunch out, that sort of thing.

JudgeFlounceRedRugBlah · 08/07/2019 12:35

I've had this and the only issue was that we couldn't put it on the system. I was happy to put it on once they had returned however there could have been difficulties if she'd argued that she didn't want the leave and we didn't have that right (we don't). I also had to tell the applicant that I would need to tell her if she started to book lots of leave and so might not have enough left for the year.

In this case it was easy, we are a small team so it's easy to remember and allow for. A larger team it may have been troublesome.

coconuttelegraph · 08/07/2019 12:36

As you can already see from the responses some workplaces = OK, some workplaces = not OK

No one here can tell you, please don't decide based on the workplaces of strangers, probably best if you aren't sure not to do it and try and find a workaround. Unless the most important part is that it's a surprise why not ask him to book the time for an unspecified birthday treat?

HungryForSnacks · 08/07/2019 12:38

What if he has something due on the day you've booked off and he misses a deadline? He might prefer to know he's having the day off so he can manage his time. You can still keep the activity as a surprise

Magenta82 · 08/07/2019 12:38

As a manager I would be really uncomfortable with the request, from a data protection and ethics point of view I would be on thin ice.

I think the furthest I would do was agree to schedule things so that it would be possible for the employee to be off if they requested the leave themselves last minute.

SgtFredColon · 08/07/2019 12:40

This would be perfectly fine and acceptable in my work. And I would just book the leave retrospectively on the system when I came back - as long as it was approved in principle.

Luaa · 08/07/2019 12:41

Can you tell him you are doing thing a and he needs to book the weekend off and then on the day take him to thing b instead?

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