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Original poster

I got fat shamed last night

102 replies

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 30/06/2019 11:45

To be fair, I am fat, so they weren’t wrong but do I really deserve to be shouted at in the street for it?

I had such a fab night out last night with a new group of friends. I walked home by myself around 11pm and some horrible people driving past shouted nasty comments to me and really spoiled my happy mood.

Now as well as nursing a hangover, I feel miserable about myself. I am already doing slimming world and have lost 1.5st.

OP posts:
BishopofBathandWells · 30/06/2019 15:07

@gamerchick Ah it's fine dude, probably shouldn't have but I spent the evening imagining their Ford Fiesta turning the corner and smashing head-first into a wall. Not very nice but extremely cathartic.

OP, lots of other posters here have it right. It's a power move, dick measuring amongst their group. It makes you feel like shit, I know.

As for people saying it's not all men - that's true too. Women can be just as awful. But the vast majority of experiences retold here have been men abusing women. That's the common lived experience of most of the people here.

SolsticeBabyMaybe · 30/06/2019 15:11

It could be worse. You could be the absolute loser who felt the need to heckle a stranger over their weight, how sad would that be?

Pogmella · 30/06/2019 15:21

I just don’t get why men feel the need to yell out of cars. I’m a size 10 and get called a fat bitch, or they suggest I might like to sit on their faces. I’m not sure which is worse. It’s not about you, it’s this gross group mentality when some men get together.

Thisnamechanger · 30/06/2019 15:24

I guarantee if you were thin they’d have still found something to shout at you

This. I get "eating a fucking cheeseburger" when out running. Some people are massive dicks.

1forAll74 · 30/06/2019 15:31

Those type of men are just thick stupid idiots. Some weeks ago I was shouted at through a car window,by two morons as I was walking along a path at about 10 pm. I had kind of stumbled over,caused by going over on one of my sandals,that had smallish wedges. They shouted,saying , hey Babe, two much to drink again and falling over..ha ha ha !! They then drove off at some speed..

So, I don't drink, and am over 70 in age.

Lisalisaandcultjam · 30/06/2019 15:36

Easier said than done but ignore it.
I personally have had lots of similar comments but from older people round where I live.
One came up and grabbed my stomach in a packed playground and asked when I was due. Next door neighbour asked where the lovely thin girl was who lived next door and that she'd been replaced by a big fat girl.
These were highlights as it happens quite a bit. My weight has varied wildly over the years and even when I've thought I was looking quite good I've still had these comments.
People either say these comments because their valves no longer work that stop them saying everything that's on their minds or that they feel insecure themselves and want to project it on to other people.
You're doing great,x

Weezol · 30/06/2019 15:45

It could be worse. You could be the absolute loser who felt the need to heckle a stranger over their weight, how sad would that be?

I'm filing that one away, thank you - I'm cronically underweight (Crohn's) and female so I've had my share of abuse from 'men' in moving vehicles.

origamiunicorn · 30/06/2019 15:45

You can lose weight, they can't lose a nasty personality.

Thefemalekeithrichards · 30/06/2019 15:47

@GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat

I’m sorry your night was spoiled but just think - You can diet but will always be beautiful inside and out whilst those fuckwads will always be nasty, bitter and twisted, vile little arseholes...don’t let such crap ruin your day they aren’t worth the power of thought let alone being upset about

stealthsquirrelnutkin · 30/06/2019 15:55

Being fat, or looking different in other ways often seems to work like a magic spell, making spite and malice visible for all to see.

Many evil bullying bastards manage to pass as normal decent people most of the time, but once you spot one of them being horrible to someone whose looks differ from the norm the cloak of decency is shredded and you to see the unattractive truth of their true selves.

It's hard at first, because personal attacks always feel personal. Try to remember that by attacking you they have outed themselves as the kind of despicable people whose opinions do not deserve respect. Then dismiss them with the contempt they deserve.

BustedDreams · 30/06/2019 17:15

Well done on your weight loss and ignore the tossers!!!

Badabingbadabum · 30/06/2019 17:20

Ugh, OP, it aas absolutely their problem, not you. Some people just never move on from being annoying 10 year olds. Someone shouted "oy fatty" at me from a car acoulle of weeks ago. I'm really quite slim and tall! There was noone else around. Some people are just immature and not very nice. I imagine him and all his sad mates were giggling about it driving around in their car while you went on and enjoyed a great night out.

EdWinchester · 30/06/2019 17:28

The thing is, the people that shouted at you will have definitely laughed and then not given it a second thought.

They are contemptible and are worthy of none of your time. You’re losing weight, great. They’re losers and always will be.

terraform · 30/06/2019 17:33

I was going up a hill on my bike and got yelled at to "hurry up you fat fucking bitch". I'm a size 8; it means nothing.

The kind of pathetic tosser who does things like this doesn't even have the brain capacity to connect eyes with gob, they'd shout abuse at any woman regardless of what they look like. Don't take it to heart, they only deserve pity for being so full of anger at their own crapness that they have to take it out on anyone who won't fight back.

RiddleyW · 30/06/2019 17:35

It’s the worst, it really is - I hope you feel better soon.

m0therofdragons · 30/06/2019 17:38

People are vile but they are the minority, unfortunately they're also the loudest. My back wall backs onto a road and yesterday evening we were having dinner in the garden. My cat - a ginger Tom - was stretched out sleeping on top of the wall. A couple of 19yo ish guys walked by and saw my cat and one yelled "ginger wanker!" I mean seriously, he's a cat. Just why? Who is impressed by that? I'd assume the guys yelling at you op have very small, herpes riddled cocks!

managedmis · 30/06/2019 17:39

This doesn't happen abroad, well not in civilised countries anyway. People just don't insult you in the streets. The UK is terrible for this.

managedmis · 30/06/2019 17:41

My cat - a ginger Tom - was stretched out sleeping on top of the wall. A couple of 19yo ish guys walked by and saw my cat and one yelled "ginger wanker!" I mean seriously, he's a cat. Just why? Who is impressed by that?

^

Absolutely mad.

When I moved abroad I cycled past a group of teenagers and was so shocked that they didn't insult me as I cycled past. I thought I'd get fat bitch, pedal faster etc some sort of stupid comment. Not a word.

Original poster
GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat · 30/06/2019 17:49

Thank you all so much! You’ve restored my faith in people that it really is them with the problem and not me. Flowers

OP posts:
ScreamingLadySutch · 30/06/2019 17:55

Bugger them.

Their behaviour is not a measure of your worth. Who cares what makes nasty people feel superior for a moment.

This is what counts: "I am already doing slimming world and have lost 1.5st."

Well done you. Keep on keeping on. It'll take a year, then they will be shouting other things. And you won't care about them then, either!

speakout · 30/06/2019 18:01

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat

So glad you posted that. You are right. You are worth more than them. Life is not about your weight.

imsuchagrump · 30/06/2019 18:11

There are some twats about , I like to run I'm a size 16 once running some lads in a car shouted to me fat arse or something ( I had headphones on so half heard I heard the fat bit though ) . I just shrugged it off I do have a fat arse but so what so does Kim Kardashian Grin. Do not let anyway get you down .

Queenofthebrae · 30/06/2019 18:13

@GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat I've been there! I'd been out for afternoon drinks with friends and was waiting for a lift home at about 6pm when two male builders walked past and shouted "if you lost 4 stone someone would love you".

I should have kept my dignity and mouth shut but I couldn't and shouted back to them "I'm married, and I can lose weight any time I choose but you will always be fucking arseholes"

Not my finest moment and as soon as I got in the car I burst into tears and still remember it 4 years later.

HildegardCrowe · 30/06/2019 18:18

It's no worse than being called an old cow for being over the age of 35.

cavalier · 30/06/2019 18:18

People project their own insecurities on others
I was an overweight child ... my brothers were the worst culprits .. they actually grew up to be very horrible unfortunately ... people will be nasty ... they live in their own toxic bubble ... im overweight and trying to cut down on choc (menopause has made me worse ) .. I walk as much as I can coz it’s easy and it lifts my moods and tones me up ... I don’t weigh
Myself .. just cutting down on junk food ...
don’t let them grind you down ... you’re beautiful no matter what they say ... they are the ugly ones💐☀️

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