Baby drinking coke from a bottle

[papergate]

Saw this earlier and was horrified!

Baby maybe just over a year old crying in pushchair.

Mum gets bottle of full fat coke out from under the pram, fills up babies bottle and hands it to the baby.

I honestly cried when I saw the baby guzzling down the cola like it was milk.

How can anyone think this is acceptable?

It reminds me a bit of the victorians and going to the Royal Bethlehem to look in horror at the patients.

We get to be disgusted and horrified but not actually do anything. Just congratulate ourselves on not being like that, even though had we had the same life, chances are we'd be the same.

I’ve seen this quite a bit too being in Scotland though it’s Irn-Bru in a bottle.

Worst one was the toddler going into nursery in the morning slugging sugar free Red Bull from a can! Teachers were in for a good day toddler on the Red Bull.

Seriously though I do see a lot of children with rotten milk teeth my cousins wee boy had to get his teeth removed because of coke in a bottle. Scotland is really bad for dental health, as well as everything else we have to brush teeth in school as well for infants.

MrsTerryPratchett why don't you advise people on how they can help? If the op was upset there is no ways she can help that, people get told to mind their own business, it's nothing to do with them etc ... So just walk on by..

I personally disagree with the walk on by, I think we should be helping more, I help a little through my sure start centre but would live to know how I could help more ?

Oh fgs
There's no need for this
Coke is shit, everyone knows it's just pure crap, and to be giving in in a bottle to a one year old is just pathetic

On my way work in the morning, I usually walk past a woman bringing her children to school at 8.30.

The school they go to starts at 8.20 and she’s usually a 5-10 minute walk away when I see her. I see them around a lot and know both boys are well able to walk and run and throw rocks at cars but she always has the youngest in a buggy where he sits eating deli potato wedges out of a greasy box, and drinking Lucozade. The older child walks, and he usually has sausage rolls or crisps, and a bottle of Coke.

Both children are massively overweight.

While I don’t cry for them, I do pity them.

I help a little through my sure start centre

That's great! And everyone helping a little is much better than a few helping a lot.

Things people can do... off the top of my head.

Some communities are way more likely to have poor nutrition. Immigrants, people living in poorer areas. So people could volunteer with community stuff there. Give to food banks. Money if possible. Your local school, kids programs, young mums programs. There are mentoring programs which vary wildly depending on area. Make friends outside your bubble.

Mostly though, it's about not saying 'they should be...' but 'what can I...'

My parents gave me Diet Coke around that age, there are photos of it. I'm still alive and turned out ok (I think).

Even when people do help in their communities, they can (and have every right to) still be upset by seeing something that clearly is not in the best interest of the child happening. Sometimes more so, as they have either lived it themselves, they see history repeating itself or they know the path some of these babies will go down.

I do think it’s crappy parenting - but we all make mistakes and know I’ve had moments of crappy parenting too. I have twin toddlers and feel guilty enough that they enjoy juice boxes (they usually only get one per day and lots of water but I get judgment for that enough when others see me hand either of them a box of juice!) but I have had even harder glares from the public at large when my toddlers are complaining for a drink and if all I have is another juice box to offer I will, because I feel the pressure of that judgment - especially when queuing for/using public transport.

Now I don’t know exactly where you were when the Mum decided to give her baby the coke - and I can’t say I wouldn’t judge a little bit either, but to use that brief glimpse into what could have been a shitty enough day for the Mum as a basis to assume that child would have a shitty life is reaching at best IMO.

The majority of people in this world have moments we are ashamed of, vices/habits we fall into and to pretend otherwise would be useless. Maybe this Mum is a loving and doting one who found out that coke would quiet her baby when she had nothing else to give. Maybe she does it regularly out of pure ignorance, not ideal but no reason to say she’s setting her children up for a horrible childhood.

If I had a choice between the abuse I endured as a baby/child or a mum who gave me a crappy drink to quiet me down but loved me... I know which I’d pick. Get some perspective.

I cried for the life she is going to have

Oh for pity sake talk about over dramatic.

I agree Tigger. But there is a difference between worrying about a child's health (fine and helpful) and feeling disgusted and horrified at the mother (not helpful).

And yes, whoever mentioned obesity is the biggest general public health issue. But not for the children we work with. The biggest issues for them are homelessness, addicted parents, suicide, sexual abuse, domestic violence and bereavement (normally also suicides/overdoses). Obesity and bad teeth are very important but mum having given up drugs and alcohol in pregnancy is probably a little more pressing.

Mumsnet - the place where the shittest parenting is excused. Except when it's the OPs parenting. In that case even the best parenting isn't good enough.

An OPs place is in the wrong.

@papergate i would have been appalled as well.

@Butteredghost hear hear

I wonder if it was Bacardi and coke.

OP I'd like to share a chilling detail of my past with you. When I was a baby I was given Coke in my bottle. And tea and coffee and pretty much anything. I've lived to tell the tale and I'm here as a survivor telling you there's hope for the little one yet

Even when people do help in their communities, they can (and have every right to) still be upset by seeing something that clearly is not in the best interest of the child happening.

Exactly this.

And also what @butteredghost said

Unbelievable responses.

Absolutely disgusting to give a 1 year old coke in a baby bottle! Wtaf.

Unless she was in the Sahara desert this is so unreasonable.

Why are people digging the OP for crying? You are not in charge of how people emotionally react to situations.

I don't care what the circumstances are there are no excuses for giving a baby coke in a baby bottle. If you can't grasp that then you're not ready to be a parent.

Giving a child Coke is not child neglect, for actual fucks sake

It’s negligent and neglectful parenting. You can make excuses for these people, I don’t.

And as for your “protein shakes” example, let’s see how far the “aw bless, they were junkies and didn’t know any better” handwringing would get them if the child died of malnutrition and they were prosecuted for neglect (here’s the answer: not very).

Veering off topic for a moment Coke (the full fat variety not the toxic Diet Coke) was recommended as an emergency substitute for Dioralyte by my GP as it has the right balance of sugar and salt for rehydration, is bottled or canned and is available everywhere.

IsThisIt82 Honestly, they just have no idea do they? It's unreal how because they don't see it/know about it, it can't possibly go on. It's so frustrating.

Are you so thick you can’t see that the OP’s concern was not about a bottle of coke in isolation but rather that if a parent can’t even get something basic like that right that there’s a possibility the rest of the child’s upbringing is completely shit?

And re the patronising “you have no idea” comments maybe actually I do. Maybe I’ve seen shitty neglectful parenting and the outcomes it’s had down the line and that’s why I’m less tolerant of shit parenting.

Do some people use MN threads as rage therapy?

It's not great, but crying is a bit much!

When my (now 6ft tall 20 year old, with lovely teeth) DS was about 14 months old he had the flu, and was quite sicky with it, and not eating at all and i couldn't get him to drink enough. My doctor actually told me to give him flat coke to sip, it made him feel a little bit better and got some fluid in him.