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Original poster

Would you find this annoying?

142 replies

BlackCatsRock · 28/05/2019 08:21

My son and I play football in our back garden. We use a soft ball, not a proper football. Occasionally (maybe 5 or 6 times a week) the ball will go over the fence into our neighbour's garden. We don't go knocking to ask for the ball back, just wait to see if they throw it back over. If you were my neighbour would you find this situation annoying?

OP posts:
0hT00dles · 29/05/2019 13:02

Sorry but yes. We go through this daily. One day we had 6 balls from next door in. Then one day I was out sorting the washing and the kid from next door is peering down (as is what happens when we use our garden- they’ve positioned a slide so it overlooks is!) and he wants me to throw our ball in.

Once, 2 years ago a ball went in from ours. We’ve never got it back.

We always throw them over but it’s so annoying. If they want it straight back, they knock. And this can be 5 times in like 20 minutes.

CuckooCuckooClock · 29/05/2019 13:06

I wouldn’t care at all.
We like our neighbours and they like us.
I also think the sound of a parent kicking a ball around with their kid in the garden is lovely.
I think your neighbours are a bit unreasonable to be irritated. But I do get irritated by lots of other things people do in their garden (playing really loud shit music for eg) so we all have our dislikes.

Miffymeow · 29/05/2019 13:06

A couple of times a month fair enough, 5-6 times a week? Honestly... After a couple of weeks of this I would 'accidentally' not notice my dog ripping it to pieces. Not that I'd have a choice anyway actually, anything that goes into our garden is shredded before we even find it.

BuzzShitbagBobbly · 29/05/2019 13:06

"just a kick about" + "light ball" must mean you are giving it some serious welly to get it sailing over fences virtually every day.

So what you are doing is not appropriate for the garden, is it. Save that 'level' of kickabout for the park and play more gently at home.

Disfordarkchocolate · 29/05/2019 13:14

Generally, I wouldn't be bothered especially if your child is quite young. And, I'd not be that fussed about you coming to get it. I'd don't have a fancy garden though.

BenWillbondsPants · 29/05/2019 13:15

We go through this daily.

With respect, it's not really 'going through' something terribly traumatic is it. If the knocking annoys you, ask them not to and you'll chuck the ball back when you next pop outside.

If your garden is being damaged then, of course, that's different.

redwoodmazza · 29/05/2019 13:15

I wouldn't mind a ball appearing about once a month, but several times a week would annoy me.

Original poster
BlackCatsRock · 29/05/2019 13:20

@Babysharkdododont
It annoys one of my neighbours, but not the other. I let him continue to play because if we all stopped doing things that annoy other people, then none of us would ever do anything. We don't go and knock for the ball. We don't expect to get the ball back. If the ball does go over, that's it for the day. I am going to put up trellis to help alleviate the problem but I'm not going to stop him. What would you encourage him to do in the garden?

@TheRLodger
You've no idea what you're talking about.

@0hT00dles
None of what you've said is relevant. We have one ball, if it goes over, that's it for the day, even if they throw it straight back. He does not go and knock for it back. And he certainly doesn't peer over the fence at them.

OP posts:
RubertRoo · 29/05/2019 13:24

Yes it would although if it is a child playing I wouldn't be as bothered. Our old next door neighbours used to kick the ball around whilst smoking outside and it would always come over at least once a day. If it was the kids playing we wouldn't have a problem throwing it back over but this was grown men. In the end we stopped rushing to get the ball before the dog ripped it to pieces - not our problem if the dog got to it first! They soon started being more careful

VanessaShanessaJenkins · 29/05/2019 13:24

Wouldn't bother me at all. If I had plants/ flowers/ gnomes etc that could get damaged though it would be different!

Maybe get a small futsal type ball which is heavier so you can't get it off the ground?
Also better for actually improving football skills. Soft floaty balls are awful.

Original poster
BlackCatsRock · 29/05/2019 13:26

@BuzzShitbagBobbly
Actually using a light ball means it's more likely to go over. But I don't want him using a proper football due to noise and damage it may cause.

I've asked the neighbours if it's caused any damage but they've said no because of where it normally lands (on their grass). We also avoid kicking the ball around when they are out in their garden. I really don't think I can do anymore than that apart from stop it all together which isn't going to happen.

OP posts:
PCohle · 29/05/2019 13:28

I let him continue to play because if we all stopped doing things that annoy other people, then none of us would ever do anything.

Yes because being a bit more careful with your football is a gross restriction of your personal freedom Hmm. This sounds like a good opportunity to demonstrate consideration for others to your son.

Original poster
BlackCatsRock · 29/05/2019 13:30

@VanessaShanessaJenkins
Floaty is a very good description for his soft ball! Perhaps we will try a heavier ball to see if that helps keep it from bouncing randomly off walls!

OP posts:
PuppyMonkey · 29/05/2019 13:31

How much do you spend a week on buying new balls, OP.Grin

I’d throw them back if I were your neighbour, if I saw them that is. Maybe your neighbours haven’t spotted them or struggle to bend etc.

Our very genial, respectable, retired neighbour has a proper thing about awol balls ( from his neighbours on the other side, not us). If he sees them, he bursts them. He will not throw back as a matter of principle.Shock

People are odd about footballs.

Original poster
BlackCatsRock · 29/05/2019 13:34

@PCohle
He is careful with the football. He doesn't boot it around like an idiot, but sometimes it goes over. He is being taught consideration for others in the fact that he's not allowed to knock for it back, he isn't allowed to play again that day, he has no expectations of getting the ball back and he doesn't play with it when they are in their garden. It's also teaching him that some people aren't as tolerant as others.

OP posts:
grafittiartist · 29/05/2019 13:35

Pop a large net up. Our neighbours did this and it's great!

BenWillbondsPants · 29/05/2019 13:35

Maybe get a small futsal type ball which is heavier so you can't get it off the ground?

This might be a good idea, we use them at school. They are heavy though.

ErrantTesselation · 29/05/2019 13:38

Yes, annoying.

Hecateh · 29/05/2019 13:47

Luckily when I was a kid neighbours on both sides also had children. If my brothers were kicking a ball about it could be 20 x an hour at times. If I was batting a ball about with a friend we would get fed up of fetching it back after 2 or 3 times.
We had permission to go and fetch the ball from either side without knocking, - as did their kids in our garden

Gazelda · 29/05/2019 13:56

It wouldn't bother me if it was occasionally, but 5/6 times a week would get on my tits.

I'd hate to have to be planning when I hang my washing out in case it gets a muddy ball land on it

I'd resent having to consider your child's school hours when I take a cuppa and mag outside to enjoy.

I'd be miffed at the possibility of my baby plants being knocked.

I don't intrude in your garden, please try harder not to intrude in mine.

PCohle · 29/05/2019 14:02

He is careful with the football.

He isn't being careful enough if it's going into a neighbour's garden 5 or 6 times a week.

Why would you do something you know is causing irritation to your neighbour when it it is easily preventable?

Original poster
BlackCatsRock · 29/05/2019 14:02

@Gazelda
No muddy balls, we have artificial grass.

As I've said, if they are out in their garden we don't play with the ball.

They have told me the ball lands on their grass, and that no damage had been caused.

So not really much to consider.

My son spends every other Thursday - Sunday with his dad so no balls are played with then.

We actually get on well with these neighbours generally and chat to them quite a lot. They are not particularly well liked within the close due to the wife being 'off' to people, although I haven't experienced this. I have an issue with them but I don't let it cloud my overall judgement towards them.

OP posts:
cleanhousewastedlife · 29/05/2019 14:03

This would piss me off because I'd never be able to completely relax in my own garden, not knowing when I / my glass / my book - whatever was going to be hit by a ball. That's the effect it would have on me.

Original poster
BlackCatsRock · 29/05/2019 14:06

@PCohle
How is it easily preventable, apart from stopping my son enjoying himself and getting some fresh air and exercise in the garden? What would you have him doing in the garden?

If both sides had an issue, I would definitely consider stopping him because then I would assume that I'm being unreasonable to let him. But one set of neighbours are fine with it, as are many of the people who have posted on this thread.

OP posts:
Original poster
BlackCatsRock · 29/05/2019 14:07

@cleanhousewastedlife
Yes, I understand that. But we do not play when they are out in their garden.

OP posts:
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