What fashion fuckery is this??

[FrozenYogurt]

Looking for a new swimsuit for my holiday and came across this beaut...

https://m.topshop.com/en/tsuk/product/clothing-427/swimwear-beachwear-3163078/orange-swimsuit-by-jaded-london-8540880?dual-run=topshop.com&geoip=noredirect&cmpid=socppfbukkfacebooktagging&istCompanyId=38aa0d7f-6514-4cb3-bbdc-df0d32d48b7f&istFeedId=5c1576b8-41f2-4da9-8a8e-e05debeb828d&istItemId=wqqitxtit&istBid=tztx

Oh ffs , that thing will follow me around now that I've clicked on it

I feel sorry for young people if they feel pressured to wear this crap.

I'd need a back crack and flap wax before wearing that. I'm sure I'd end up in A&E because it got lost up an orifice. Wouldn't want to risk a waterside!

I was thinking, looking at it, that when I clicked on the photos it would also be like a G string - sooooo with that in mind, it’s really not too bad

I could make that from my OH's tie!

Sweet baby Jesus that is truly awful.

Just why?? There is absolutely nothing right with that is there? The cut, design, pattern....just all of it...just why the actual fuck??

I feel sorry for young people if they feel pressured to wear this crap.

I wouldn't, not one little bit. I think I'd be laughing too hard and looking forward to when they're older and they look back on their 'fashion sense' with horror

I should like to give a male perspective on this, if I may.

Yep, it's fugly as hell! [boak]

I’m 5’9 and a Top Shop / Zara size 12 with FF boobs. Not a chance I’d wear it at my age of 49.

I were my height, aged 17-25, a size 6-8 with a B-C cup, I’d wear it to Waitrose.

It’s not even flattering on the model and she is otherwise lovely looking. That’s usually when you have to start asking questions.

I'll be rocking the Trump-kini look this Summer

Worra, that's gorgeous. Would look particularly fab on my middle aged lumpy self.

Shit my eyes! How did you manage to make the thread worse

Oh my goodness! Thats the worst of that style I've sent yet.. I'd love to try one on for the laugh though

my eyes, my eyes.....

you should have put warning before someone click on it

lol

Shit a brick. Horrific. I suppose at least it’s “only” £40 though, unlike this monstrosity: www.asos.com/minimale-animale/minimale-animale-aura-swimsuit-in-black/prd/11466508?CTAref=We+Recommend+Carousel_2&featureref1=we+recommend+pers

Thanks for the male perspective! Us ladies would have all been frantically buying it unless you stepped in.

Shit my eyes! How did you manage to make the thread worse

You know when someone says "I laughed and spat my drink out"? And you think 'Yeah I bet you didn't really'?

I actually did

The woman on Eurovision just now would rock that!

Good lord!

If I farted in that, would it come out as a whistle?

Wouldn't it just be easier to carry around a sign saying: "WOMEN, YOU ARE EXPECTED TO BE FULLY SHAVEN AT ALL TIMES"?

I'm not convinced tbh that extinction isn't the best outcome for our species.

MatthewBramble. It’s ok, some of us got your ‘tone’. 🙂.

I looked through the whole range, there wasn’t one thing that made me think ‘wish I still had the figure to wear that’. The designer needs shooting, it’s awful bloody awful.

The original one posted makes her arse look comically long, like 2 Peter Crouch heads

On the other hand, surely this will help me to swim better?

Actually forget that. I couldn't cope with kids throwing stale bread at me.

How, in the name of the wee man, do you actually get into it?

DH's reaction:

WTAF!
Really??
Ludicrous
That is not in the least bit arousing

So that’s what happened to Action Mans hips