Worst dates ever

[ThunderOnlyHappens]

Watched a bit of 'First Dates' and it reminded me of some odd dates I've been on.

1)The guy who cried at dinner because he kissed his dog
2) the guy who got his calculator out to work out my half of dinner
3) the guy who turned up wearing a floor length leather coat and who told me his job was in 'advertising'-he meant he was a leaflet dropper .

I stopped dating after this for a while because they all happened in the space of a few months!

Tell me yours, currently essay writing and need a break/distraction....

missed his dog- though the crying was suspicious

Not me but my dd.
I set her up with a young man I knew. She agreed to go to shut me up..
He collected her from our back st and stopped his car at the bottom to validate his Orange phone 2-1 cinema deal!!
She took a long time to forgive me!

Had a really enjoyable date with a guy - laughed, had a couple who of drinks etc. Wrapped it up around 11.30pm with a peck on the cheek and said goodbye - he then asked if I wanted to meet his mum? She was waiting in the pub down the road and was dying to meet me apparently I declined, drove away and got a speeding ticket on my way home It was a true MN moment - RUN! THE HILLS ARE THAT WAY ➡ I ran (well, drove) and got caught by the fucking police.

Met a guy who was pretty short as in he could hardly see over the bar. He then proceeded to tell me how much he loved bridges and all about different types of bridges. 😂

I can never decide between two.

There was the guy who messaged me after our date saying he wanted to rape me I didn't hear from him again for about a year when he contacted me and offered to pay me for sex I blocked him then

Then a guy who turned up in a dirty top with holes in. He went and ordered drinks. Then the waitress brought his meal out. He didn't tell me he was having a meal, or ask if I wanted one. Then he told me exactly how much I owed for my drink. I told him I'd buy the next ones but he he said he'd rather I just paid him back. He then told me his ex had a mc but in the long run it was a good thing because they'd split up sometime after and she would have ended up as a single parent. (I was a single parent and he said this as if it wad the worst thing you could be) . He stared at me the whole time. I ended up putting my sunglasses on just to avoid eye contact. He told me after it was the best date he ever had

He collected her from our back st and stopped his car at the bottom to validate his Orange phone 2-1 cinema deal!!

What’s wrong with that?! If you have a voucher it’s a shame to not use it!!

@ThunderOnlyHappens - he missed his dog just because he was away from it while on a date or had the dog died?

Brought his dog on the date, went to loo leaving me with dog. I was asked to leave the pub because the dog was whining for him. I was not.

Arrived at pub, sat down at table in booth with date. Glanced across table to other one in booth, ex boyfriend was sitting facing me.

I was 20 and went on a date with a 28 year old man. Over dinner, he proceeded to tell me how desperate he was to get married and have children, and how he had been depressed that it hadn't happened yet. He then began saying that I was his idea of a "dream girl" and just the type he always wanted to be with. Right after this he asked if I would travel 3 hours away the following weekend to MEET HIS MOTHER because he was "positive she will love" me.

I never answered any of his many phone calls that went on for weeks. I had met him at the restaurant and I was so glad he didn't know where I lived.

@Traveler001 his dog was at home, his 'best friend' apparently. It was a long, long time ago!

A friend was dating a guy who I had never met. We were good mates, but very different. She was a punk, I'm more classic and feminine.

She said her boyfriends brother always came along and they couldn't get rid of him, would I double date. I kept refusing but she was telling me how good looking he was, how I'd like him, all the usual crap. And I agreed.

Large merc pulls up and this guy gets out the back, I'm five eight and was wearing three inch heels, so was knocking on six foot. I was eighteen I think. The man was in his fifties, and tiny. Like five foot odd and about six stone. Indian gentleman, not that it matters.

He just kept staring up at me and blinking. And say oh you're so pretty. That was it. That's all he said. Repeatedly, we had to drive for nearly an hour to the bar we were going to. And I was in the back with him. I genuinely tried to make conversation but all he said was oh you're so pretty and blinked and nodded a lot. Or he'd touch my Blouse and say this is so pretty. Or my skirt. That was so pretty. It was awful.

Got to the bar, ordered drinks, sat down, and still no conversation. Just lots of telling me how pretty I was and everything I wore was.. i Don't think he had anything mentally wrong with him and I guess he expected another punk. My friend was late twenties. Not an eighteen year old in heels and a shortish skirt.

I really had had enough, and went to thr loo. And yes an ex boyfriend was there. With his rugby playing friends. Walked past their table and they called me over, and one of the friends said, are you actually going out with that guy, we are taking bets on it. I was mortified. It looked like I was dating a very petite and clearly wealthy Indian gent (clothes shoes etc) old enough to be my grandad.

I said no I wasn't, it was a blind date, and when I got back to thr table, demanded as all teenagers do, that we leave. So we did. And drove the hour home in absolute silence.

She said she'd not told me as I'd not have went if she had. Apart from thr fact her boyfriend was very tall and well built, and this man was tiny, I'd honestly have thought it was his fucking dad.

I meta bloke from tinder in a pub. He was about a foot shorter than he’d claimed to be. As if I wouldn’t notice?! Then he turned out to be a dick. I went to the loo and rang my mom and said I wanted to just leave secretly and she convinced me to be polite and finish my drink then make an excuse.

When I got back downstairs he’d left! I was really offended!

Then he ‘accidentally’ called me that night and tried to make it sound like he was having sex with someone. WTAF

@FromthePinkGlitterySide hahaha what an idiot.

I met up with a guy from POF who was late teens, early 20's. Can't remember? Had grey hair when his pictures had black hair and had a really 'musty' smell that I just can not describe.

Ended up spending the day together as that was the original plan and a bit awkward to drop out so after a day walking around London we had a few drinks and made our way back to the train, luckily not in the same direction and he lunged at me like full on landed on me for a snog (

@thunderonlyhappens I thought you was going to say that 🙈🤣

An odd bloke called Neil who was late because he'd dropped a pound on his way out the door, who then left early because he was so anxious about finding this pound he couldn't relax

Another guy who had no furniture, eg sofa cushions on the floor and mattress on the floor- tried to convince me that it was some bohemian lifestyle but actually it was because his ex had left and taken everything with her!

Or the guy who asked me why my tan only went on the outside of my arms. I politely explained that if he's never dated anyone without a spray tan before, then we might not be 'compatible'- and left.

I hated dating. And I would hate it even more now, at least when I was doing OLD it was Match.com and none of this swipe left/right nonsense.

These are funny! Thank you for the smiles!
I dated someone for about a week or so and he seemed normal enough but he wasn't for me . But he'd booked a spa day for us and I greedily said yes. I was waiting in the pool area for him to come through from changing room and I actually heard people gasp looking over he'd got the smallest tightest whitest budgie smugglers/ thong on you could imagine!
Trust me to be greedy over a spa day !!

You all really need to read 'penetration man' in classics

I didn’t date much before I met dh, and luckily only had 1 bad date

It started fine, he was fit, had a lovely voice, good job etc We had a great meal. Then it was time to leave and he told me we had to wait a moment to get up as he was hard! (I hadn’t touched this man, just sat opposite him and ate and that turned him on???)

I promptly decided I was going home at this point and he said “Sure you don’t want any sausage tonight?” (What grown man refers to his penis as sausage??)

He even texted telling me He’d love to see me again

My friend went on a date where the guy had a voucher for 2 for 1 meals. That's fine, all for getting a good deal. Except he made her pay the whole bill as his was free.

Another friend met a guy who apparently dated 6 nights a week as he had no TV.

Sorry PortpentinaScamander but this bit of your post

I ended up putting my sunglasses on just to avoid eye contact has properly tickled me 😂

Oh I forgot the bloke who I met in a pub (can you see a theme here) who I wasn’t interested in at all. I was being nice and making polite conversation when he asked if I was hungry. I said no. He decided to order a full meal. He seemed like a nice bloke, just not my cup of tea so I didn’t want to cut him down. I sat there while he ate a full meal. Then he licked his knife and I nearly vommed. Then we left, separately obvs and he sent me random messages over the next few months telling me what type of knot he was going to use to tie me up with. God I love online dating

I’m definitely taking sunglasses next time. That’s genius!

I might have been definitely was someone's worst date.

We were at a Japanese restaurant where the chef cooks in front of you. There were only four of us in the whole restaurant, (the other two were two friends) so they asked to seat us together.

I didn't hit it off with my date, but did have a laugh with one of the other men, and may have blown my date off and left the restaurant with the fun guy instead...

The most disappointing one was a man who appeared promising, very attractive, intelligent, funny, great spark... Then he mentioned "my wife..." and told me it was ok, she didn't mind. Well I did and left.

Another man showed up at least fourteen years younger than his stated age. He insisted he was 38, he looked like a kid, not a day over 24, if that.