Driving lesson support thread

[FannyFeatures]

Anyone else out there learning to drive?

I'm 33 and after years of not wanting/needing to drive I'm finally at the stage where it will actually make my life so much easier!

Currently managing quiet roads easily but struggling a bit with roundabouts but it's more confidence than anything else.

Theory test is booked for the middle of May too 🤯

I've booked my theory! Earliest appointment I could get was 24th July so I went for that. Gives me a couple of months to swat up. Congrats to everyone that's made progress this week however big or small. I'm hoping to get out for lots of practice over the weekend as the DC are away.

Well done Shadows. That's plenty of time to swot.

I went out for a drive with dh this evening. It was great - hardly any other cars. And loose chippings for miles so I didn't have to go above 20 for most of the way

Thanks Countess it feels a bit real now that I've booked something, it's only the theory so god knows what I'll be like when I've booked the practical! Well done on your drive, I love going out on quiet roads, I'm an awesome driver when there are no other cars about!

This afternoon DH gets home from work early and we are going driving. The plan is that we will do proper driving i.e. roads that have 2 lanes and other traffic on them. I am incredibly eeeek about this. If i don't bugger this up then it'll be smooth sailing from here but I'm rather concerned I will bugger it up. We have been out loads last week and this week but at night when there is no other traffic at all, or in the day time when the only stuff I've encountered is a few tractors and some dog walkers. The roads are all windy one track lanes with a few stretches of small windy B roads in between. Keep telling myself I just need to dive in, feel the fear and do it anyway. I'm sure DH wouldn't be suggesting it if he thought I was likely to crash/kill us all .... I'll report back later.

On the upside though I'm really really good at hills, blind bends, fords, narrow hump bridges and encountering livestock on roads. So that's got to count for something right?!

Bugger, was hoping to get myself on DH's insurance so I could practice more often but I forgot he's only been driving 2.5 years so it's 3 hours a week maximum for me just now 🙄

Feel like I want/need to do more!

Practical test is booked but there was no availability until August here so a fair wait and not as soon as is hoped, plenty of time to get more driving and experience in I guess. Bloody pricey keeping up lessons until then though!!

'On the upside though I'm really really good at hills, blind bends, fords, narrow hump bridges and encountering livestock on roads.'

Ha, me too.
I nearly got my first pheasant yesterday.

Countess we are overrun with pheasants and partridge round here. They are so irritating jogging down the road in front of you aren't they? Why don't they go into the verge/fly out the way? Drives me mad, crawling along with a chubby bird trotting down the road in front of me
I hear that a lot of people really struggle with super rural driving so I'm telling myself it's a good experience to have under my belt.

Fanny that's rubbish about not being able to go out with your DH. At least by the time August rolls round those 3 hours a week will have really added up. The waiting times for tests seem to be ridiculous, I am withing 1.5 hours of 4 test centres so I'm going to go for whichever one has the shortest wait and treat the trek all the way to the test as a mammoth revision session!

I'm an awesome driver when there are no other cars about!

I really relate to this

'I'm an awesome driver when there are no other cars about!'

I'm not! Dh pointed out I do too much braking and accelerating. I need to be a lot smoother.

I did another country drive today (to another village for lunch). Feel like I want to push myself by going somewhere a bit more trafficky.
Not on my own, though. Right now I am not feeling stressed by driving itself, just by the thought of doing it on my own...

I bloody did it!!!! I drove on roads with other cars!!!! We went out and DH drove to a town where he had to do a quote and then I drove from there to another town, to the supermarket and drove us home after the food shop! I did roundabouts (first time), traffic lights (first time), the works. So chuffed. it wasn't perfect and lots to work on but I did it, I didn't panic and I didn't crash. WOOO!

Hope everyone's enjoying their weekend. I'm planning on doing another load of driving tomorrow so fingers crossed it goes just as well as today.

Well done, Shadows. That's brilliant. You did really well.

I went for another country drive with dh. Saw a deer (though not in the road).
Sign of progress: he is now relaxed enough to be studying the OS map rather than looking at the road.
Lots more of these 'loose chippings, you only need to go at 20' signs. (That may not be exactly what they said...)

Well done Shadows sounds like you've done brilliantly! I am out later today with DH, taking some positivity from your success as right no I am desperately trying to stop imagining terrible scenarios where I do stupid things. Starting to realise that half of this battle is in my mind.

'Starting to realise that half of this battle is in my mind'

Too right.
The instructor who finally got me through the test said to me after my first lesson, 'you don't have a problem with driving. The problem is in your head.'
I ended up downloading a self hypnosis tape (which is not like me as I am not very woo, but I reckoned if the problem was in my mind the solution had to be). It involved doing lots of visualisations of myself driving around all happy and relaxed, and getting those images to replace the dominant ones of myself crashing. It was really helpful.

I'm glad I've found this thread as I've just started driving lessons at age 40+. I'm finding it quite slow going and hard to remember everything as I'm permanently knackered from my 2 year old.

Has anyone found any good online resources, (apart from this thread!) they would recommend? My instructor is a bit old school and hasn't been able to recommended any reading or online resources or apps.

Just wondering how soon people have done their theory test? I haven't had any time to look at it really, is there's lots to learn?

Hi Zavy I've found this website to be really helpful for breaking down the maneuvers, and it seems to have lots of other driving info and tips on it. I believe it's written by current/ex driving instructors which is reassuring. www.drivingtesttips.biz/reverse-parking.html
I've also downloaded the highway code onto my tablet for the theory stuff and have got a theory test app. I think it's called 4 in 1 theory or something like that? There are quite a few of them about, I just read the reviews on the app store and went with the one that had the best feedback. It had a free sample app which I started off with but then paid for the full version. It has hazard perception clips and I've found it very helpful. I was very surprised that so many questions related to car maintenance (like how to top up a battery) and first aid, so I definitely think practice questions are helpful as its given me a better idea of what to expect in the test. It's also frustrating as an automatic driver that questions relating to gears keep coming up! I hadn't a clue having never driven with gears so had o get DH to givee me a basic run through!!
Round here there is a huge waiting time for theory tests, like 3-4 months so I've booked mine now at the beginning of my driving journey and I've got a few months to swot up. I didn't realise that you can't book your practical until you've passed your theory so I guess the sooner it's booked in the better as I'm assuming there will be big waiting times for practicals as well.

I would definitely get on and get the theory test booked. There is a fair bit of swotting to do but you can fit it in at odd moments. A lot of the questions are common sense so if you practice in an efficient way you end up with just a handful that you have to focus on. It's worth doing as many hazard perception clips as you can. Answering them in the test is a very specific skill (ie you could be the world's best hazard perceiver in real life but fail the test because you weren't used to how it wants you to click) but it is also good training in analysing the road ahead quickly and figuring out what might happen.

I have been for another drive - an hour, busy country roads and few a couple of towns.
Still not been out on my own...

through a couple of towns...

I haven't read through the thread but just saw this in active and it couldn't come at a better time for me as I feel defeated.

28, been learning for almost a year, almost 50 lessons now. Theory passed 50/50 no problems there but I just can't grasp driving at all. I make the same mistakes every week it's so frustrating and I'm not progressing. Yesterday I burst out crying and spent the last half of my lesson talking about how I don't think I'm ever going to get it and drove home.

What's the point, I'm skint on benefits so am never going to be able to afford a car anytime soon anyway until I'm in full time work which I don't see happening until next year. I'm wasting money I don't have on something I can't do and I feel like a total failure that I can't do a simple life skill.

IGiveUpNow1, a few things.

Firstly, you have not been wasting your time. All the effort you have put in will have been getting you somewhere, it is normal in learning any skill that you have times when you feel like you are getting nowhere and other times when you make rapid progress. But the moments of progress come because of the hours you put in plugging away and not seeing results and feeling thoroughly fed up. This is how learning stuff works.

Secondly, it is normal for different people to take different lengths of time. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. You aced the theory test. There are people out there who picked up practical driving skills really fast but are held back from even taking the test because they keep failing the theory. You will get there in the end. It's not a competition as to who learns the fastest and I have heard it said several times that the best and safest drivers aren't necessarily the ones who got through their test quickly.

Thirdly, it isn't actually that long till next year. Obviously you can only keep going as long as you are physically able to pay for lessons but it seems perfectly sensible to me that you would be learning now with a prospect of getting your own car some time next year.

Fourthly some life skills actually aren't that simple. Just because 'everyone' does it doesn't mean it comes easily to everyone. Learning to drive is hugely complicated especially in this country, which is great in a way because it has left us with an amazingly low accident rate considering how many cars there are.

There is nothing wrong with taking a break and coming back to it if you have lost your mojo a bit/run out of money, but don't give up xxx

TheCountessofFitzdotterel

Thank you so much for taking the time to write that post. I'm just feeling very sorry for myself at the moment after crying yesterday.

I'm a single parent of two and my hourly lessons were my escape from them each weekI have to budget very carefully to be able to pay for a lesson. Some weeks I don't manage to afford to get out and I'm starting to feel like I can't justify the money I'm spending each week when it could go towards other stuff (my children always come first I never book a lesson if they need anything).

Yesterday was going to be my last lesson for a couple of months anyway as I'm going away for a few days with my children and need to save up for that.

I spoke with my instructor yesterday about possibly trying automatic lessons when I'm back but as they're more expensive it's going to be an even bigger struggle for me, and my parents have manual cars which is what I'd have to be using until I could afford my own car. So we came to the decision that I take a couple of months break and after my holiday go back out and treat it as my first lesson and go from there. I am also writing and reading notes in the hope that helps me as I find I take more in from reading than being shown which probably explains me finding the theory test so easy.

As I say I hope next year to be working and in a a different financial position. I start studying in August and said last year I can't wait to be driving back and forward from college but that won't be happening now. But yes if I wasn't skint then I don't think I'd be as frustrated and putting so much pressure on myself because it's a lot of money to me, I think that's why I haven't given up until now because I look at how much money I've spent and it makes me feel a bit sick tbh😂

You're post has gave me a boost and made me realise I don't want to give up and I have to persevere so thank you

Can I jump on this thread? I’ve got my first lesson booked for tomorrow - I’m pretty nervous. I’ve spent ages trying to find someone who has availability around my work and it’s been so difficult. Spoke to him on the phone today and he wasn’t particularly chatty and sounded a bit grumpy so now I’m panicking a bit!

Thanks for the links Shadow, I will take a look, when I get chance. Countess, I've no idea how long theory test waiting times are near me but if I book one it will force me to revise I guess!

Thanks for the great advice all, keep it coming!

Welcome everyone :o

I did my theory after 2 weeks of driving, I used the official dvsa app to swat up and I passed first time using it whenever I could.
I found it really useful and much more realistic then a lot of the free ones I tried first so it's definitely worth the £4.99.