Making local friends as an adult commuter?

[teawamutu]

Just found out beloved friends will be moving away. This leaves one family in the area that we socialise with.

We've been here for years, but the friends we made as childfree drunken twentysomethings have moved away, the mums of the dcs' schoolfriends have mostly stayed as mum friends rather than family friends, and we both work miles away.

Friends all over the country but hardly any where we live

Is this unusual? I feel like a total social failure and I don't know where to start changing it.

I'm in the same boat. I hate it. I've now made a few mum friends through NCT but when we meet it's all about the babies and can't seem to tip over into other topics. Good pals from school and uni are scattered far and wide but I'd love people to have a bbq with on the bank holidays.

Meet Up app is a good place to start, though obviously it takes time and perseverance to work on friendships.

It does, Lady, and we've partly let that slip the last few years, because we're knackered and had stuff to deal with - but partly we're just far too reserved and British. Need to be more 'come round for lunch even though we don't know you that well and you might say no and even if you didn't it might be awkward' (you see the problem?)