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Game Of Thrones- Desperate to watch, but not sure I can handle the sexual violence. Shall I give it a go?

76 replies

Cookiedoughforbreakfast · 16/04/2019 10:57

Hi,

I genuinely love the sound of it. The music even gets me excited and I haven't watched a single episode!

The problem is, I just can't handle seeing sexual violence on the TV and I hear this features heavily.

I don't suppose it's a simple as skipping those scenes, as it sounds like I'd be skipping half the series!

My dp has only seen the first couple of series, but agrees that I'd find it a struggle, but also thinks I'd really enjoy it, minus all that.

Has anyone managed to get past this or is it just one to avoid if you struggle with this kind of thing?

TIA

OP posts:
SlappingJoffrey · 16/04/2019 11:03

There is a lot of it but I'd say you could still follow it fine if you fast forward. When people say a lot they mean a lot relative to other programmes, rather than it being 40% of the screen time or whatever. It's still quite a small amount and there are episodes where there isn't any.

Cookiedoughforbreakfast · 16/04/2019 11:15

Thanks, Slapping.

My dp said it would spoil the flow if I did this, which I get, but I just don't think I could handle it otherwise.

OP posts:
ItchySeveredFoot · 16/04/2019 11:18

It also tones down a bit with each season so it would only be the first couple where it's an issue I think.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Mrsjayy · 16/04/2019 11:21

I didn't think i was prudish till i started watching GOT it has sexual violence incest and random views of breasts I watched half of the first series and stopped watching it. My Dd loves it and is a huge fan I don't get it. If you are going to be sensitive I would find something else to watch.

Mrsjayy · 16/04/2019 11:22

Oh my Dd is a grown woman im not allowi g a child to watch it.

MorrisZapp · 16/04/2019 11:22

My nephew calls it Game of Tits

MorrisZapp · 16/04/2019 11:22

Also grown up!

Mrsjayy · 16/04/2019 11:24

Game of titsGrin

MargotLovedTom1 · 16/04/2019 11:24

It's been a long time since I watched the early series but my main memory is lots of gratuitous 'tits oot' stuff; brothel scenes; lesbian goings on and general titillating for the sake of titillating shenanigans. Joffrey is a sadistic bastard mind you.
Watch it and avert your eyes at the bits you find upsetting. It really is a fantastic programme, for all its flaws.

SandAndSea · 16/04/2019 11:27

No, I thought it was awful and didn't want to be OK with it. I don't understand the appeal at all.

GiantPretzel · 16/04/2019 11:33

I’m with Sand. Not only am I not ok with it, I don’t want to be, and I’m surprised and taken aback more women don’t feel equally repelled by tv shows — and it’s not as if GoT is alone in this — where lingered-on rape and sexual assault is a major element in plot advancement, AND where key scenes in which Men Decide Stuff frequently have women being casually screwed, or merely in attendance without clothes, in the background.

SlappingJoffrey · 16/04/2019 11:35

Yeah I really didn't like the incest stuff. That bothered me more than anything. It is a pretty problematic programme, there's no doubt about that. Not just because of sexism.

TheQueef · 16/04/2019 11:37

Try the book first.
Although gratuitous nakedness in the telly series the story ends badly for rapers and brothel owners mostly at the hands of powerful females.

Cookiedoughforbreakfast · 16/04/2019 11:52

I have to say, I do find it quite disturbing just how popular it is, given the way women are apparently treated throughout.

However, the revenge side of things, I love! I could probably cope more with the violence, if I knew they'd get their comeuppance.

OP posts:
LiveFatsDieYoGnu · 16/04/2019 11:56

I had to stop watching it because I was so weary of and repulsed by that aspect. I’ve read all the books so I was pretty invested in watching it but I am so tired of rape-as-entertainment. I was finding excuses not to watch the next episode and in the end gave up, despite the many good things about the series.

RebeccaCloud9 · 16/04/2019 11:59

I've just started (took me a while to bring myself to start due to the violence). I don't like any if the violence or even any of the fighting or gruesome bits but I just go on my phone for a distraction for those bits - I don't fast forward so I don't miss chunks of plot, but just don't watch. I'm enjoying it.and think I'm hooked (I'm up to the middle of season 2).

JasperRising · 16/04/2019 12:02

The early season are quite farcical for gratuitous nudity and for "sexposition" ie: explaining complex plot points during sex. However, it is worth noting (whilst trying not to be too spoilers) that some of the women who suffer in the early seasons go on to be powerful in their own right. And yes there is comeuppance for some characters not all. And the gratuitous nudity has toned down in later seasons though not gone completely.

However, it is not an easy watching series. There are some graphic scenes that I watched through my fingers (of violence in general not just sexual violence) and there are some episodes I won't rewatch. It also not a programme where being 'good' necessarily bring rewards - like real life, good people die and suffer and horrible people seem to keep prospering (though see previous point that comeuppance does come but we can be talking over several series).

MotherWol · 16/04/2019 12:12

I'm with SandAndSea on this one - I'm not okay with it, and I don't want to be. It's not just that there's nudity, or violence, it's that there's violence against women (and IIRC in some cases, children), marketed as entertainment. History and modern life is already full of that, why would I want to seek it out as entertainment?

DobbysLeftSock · 16/04/2019 12:17

I've "watched" it by just watching clips on you tube! That way I've avoided the sexual and proper nasty violence and basically just picked up all the plot points and all the really cool bits. DH insists this doesn't count but we never have time to watch that much tv, he's stuck half way through season 5 and I just want to know what happens!

MockerstheFeManist · 16/04/2019 12:18

So dark you can't see anything, most of the time.

WildFlower2019 · 16/04/2019 12:25

@Cookiedoughforbreakfast

Women are treated horribly but it's for a reason at first (in terms of story lining and drama). Because, in later seasons it's the women who come out on top and "save the day" in many respects. After being so downtrodden and used (for sex, married for lands and power, abuse) it's the women who rise and become powerful. Many of the men in power end up dead.

Some of the women seek revenge and avenge earlier wrongdoings, some become powerful and rule, some protect, others have the weapons and army's required to save the day (being purposely vague as not to spoil anything)!!

The latter couple of seasons are where this transformation happens, most of the 7 kingdoms are run by women/Queens.

Strong women do come into it throughout the different series and lots of women grow stronger throughout.

Women and girls in the North are even implored to take up arms and fight in a later series because "why would we sit knitting by the fire while men fight for our lives" (paraphrased!)

The wildling or "free" women beyond the wall are also shown as strong and powerful figures, they openly discuss sex and wanting it just as much as the men. They fight, they hunt. They're not just sat on the sidelines birthing babies and sewing.

One tumblr user found non consensual sex scenes triggering so complied a list with time stamps for the majority of the seasons. They also list other nude scenes, sex scenes and gore. Should you decide to watch it, you could always skip these and maybe ask your DH/DP to fill in blanks that are important to the plot (eg character A breaks up abuse between characters B and C).

welcometothejambie.tumblr.com/post/177434230575/game-of-thrones-trigger-list

Knowing exactly when they're going to happen should at least lessen the impact/remove anxiety.

That's if you decide you want to watch it of course.

There's always the books if you don't fancy the series. You can flip pages easily, and apparently they're not as graphic as the tv series. (I can't confirm this personally!)

WildFlower2019 · 16/04/2019 12:27

Sorry for my terrible grammar! Oooof! Armies not army's

Mismade · 16/04/2019 12:37

Try the book first.

But lots of the sexual violence is not in the novels, but has been added for the TV adaptation (some has also been taken out in adaptation, but a lot of the time it goes the other way and it's expanded), and characters are invented to amplify the sexual violence, or minor characters are turned into fill-blown sexual psychopaths.

Ramsay is mostly a distant character in the novels -- we hear bad things about him but don't see them happening, but he's turned into a sexual sadist in the series. Joffrey in the novels doesn't have Ros rape another prostitute with his sceptre (as if we don't already know what he's like). Ser Meryn in the novels doesn't get his kicks from raping underage girls.

It's implied in the novels that the mutineers at Craster's Keep rape Craster's wives (but not described) the series shows it in detail, and invents Meera's near rape. When Cersei and Jaime have sex by the corpse of their dead son in the novels, it's consensual in the TV version, Cersei doesn't consent.

And so on, and so on.

I don't think it makes the slightest difference that some of the abused women end up in powerful positions -- people just use that to justify the fact that at some level they think watching women be raped is entertainment.

I think the producers just think depressingly, but apparently correctly that gratuitous sexual violence is good for ratings.

Mrsjayy · 16/04/2019 12:41

wildflower most of that is revololting it sounds almost pornographic I am glad I stopped watching it a few programmes in

RebeccaCloud9 · 16/04/2019 12:43

The OP hasn't watched it yet, so maybe stop giving spoilers...