Which "class" - Lighthearted!

[dingdongdahlia]

So, my dh is very proud of his roots and is quite happy to tell everybody and anybody about how we're a working class family. Personally, I think class is quite an outdated concept but definitely think there are some things that are still considered wc/mc/us.

I've explained to dh that it's not as clear cut anymore and while he works a blue collar job, it's as much about lifestyle nowadays as your employment.

I say to my husband he's probably closer to middle class now because of tiny little things that make up our lifestyle but he denies it vehemently. I come from a very traditionally middle class family and he says he "dragged me down" (with a cheeky smile).

So, in the most lighthearted way possible, what do you think?

Dh works a very skilled manual job, he has an element of responsibility and although he achieved his role through an apprenticeship I would say his level of knowledge is pretty close to a masters in engineering. He calls himself a spanner monkey.

I have a professional role that is traditionally a middle class career.

We own our own home in a suburb of a city in the south coast. Four bed with garage, almost paid off (we're early 30s).

We eat out at least 10x a month at naice places and stay in nice hotels frequently as a couple (disclaimer: directly linked to my job).

We shop at Ocado and local independent butchers, greengrocers etc. Christmas meat is always bought from the butcher.

We have at least one foreign holiday a year with several other UK breaks throughout the year.

We have a cleaner (he hates this but hates a messy house more).

We have a bean to carafe coffee machine.

Our kids are young but it's looking like we will potentially send them to private school for secondary.

He snowboards and skis. Trying to convince me to take the kids on a skiing holiday (I'm not keen).

We own Barbour jackets (the wax variety that don't have the logo emblazoned all over it).

He's voted Tory in the past.

Obviously this is very lighthearted and a bit of a family joke. Just wanted to see what people think.

YY - I get you. It's hard to describe, but when you move between classes, there is a kind of mental and sometimes even emotional dissonance. You have two different standards of 'normal' and the distance between them can be surprising and even upsetting, especially when you realise that other people simply take for granted things you really struggled for. It's like having your own vision and a pair of spectacles that you put on at the same time.

@GregoryPeckingDuck I would just say that we don't throw our money around. Not meaning to drip feed, house we overpay to the wire to free up money sooner and get the mortgage down as fast as possible. Eating out is subsidised because of my role (it's all expenses and tax deductible) if I didn't do my job we would eat out maybe once a month. Barbour jacket was because I was sick of buying cheap coats that fell apart and wanted something warm and dry. My eldest dd has one, it's mine from when I was a kid.

No heating for 90% of the year either. I'm told to leave the thermostat alone and put another jumper on. Dh used to switch off almost every single plug socket in the house before bed as well to save money when we first bought our house. Lol

You have children old enough to drive whilst still only in your early thirties?

That makes a lot of sense @downcasteyes. In the same vein my dad was always away when I was growing up. No gps around etc. I really envy my dh's upbringing for having family around and not having to behave "correctly" (I once got asked to leave a "club" my parents were involved with because my shoes were too "trainer-like". My dad went batshit at me as well as my mum that I was going to ruin his reputation). My mum just said who would want to be a member of a place like that anyway. Even between my parents there was that huge divide.

@Crushedvelvetcouch nephews and nieces.

I’m not from this country. Can someone explain why people want to be working class or are very proud to be working class? There seems to be a virtue associated with it that I don’t understand.

@mimibunz I guess it's about everything you have you've earned I guess. No hand-outs and if you've done well it's from your own hard work. We love an underdog.

Right, sorry got it. I read it as you had children of a similar age, not that your nephews and neices were a similar age to you.

Typing too fast and not paying attention to what I'm writing I think! @Crushedvelvetcouch

"Can someone explain why people want to be working class or are very proud to be working class?"

I think it's quite similar to being proud to be a feminist woman, or being proud to be black or gay or whatever. They are types of identity that are counter to the dominant/hegemonic power, and that have a different experience and knowledge attached to them. These days, class arguably lags behind other forms of identity for recognition of the prejudice attached to it, to be honest.

mimibunz I am British and I still don't understand taking pride in your social class.
After all it is sheer accident of birth, and really if you remove the financial aspect, is one really more desirous than another?
If you leave finances in the equation of pride then you are essentially being proud of being richer or poorer than others.
Which is a bit odd when you think about it.

You are financially comfortable op but it sounds like you feel socially awkward. Just get on with life. DH grew out of socially awkward once he'd made his first million and become confident with his irons

FWIW: supper, sofa, bog, Penny

@OhTheRoses Nail on the head there I think.

Thanks everybody
Fuck off Daily Mail

Lots to take in, think about and then forget because it's all just weird bullshit that shouldn't really matter in the grand scheme of things.

I used to work for someone as live in staff (I'm talking proper aristocracy) who considered the Queen middle class! 😁

Behind closed doors a lot of the aristos are quite sneery about the royal family. Jokes about Tupperware, being recent German incomers, the sort of cheese the queen eats, etc.

@NicoAndTheNiners That's really interesting (and doesn't surprise me!)

Eating out is subsidised because of my role (it's all expenses and tax deductible) if I didn't do my job we would eat out maybe once a month.

How is eating out with your family a tax deductible business expense?

Class is nothing to do with where you shop or the money you have or don't have. What did your grandparents do, and your great-grandparents?

"If you leave finances in the equation of pride then you are essentially being proud of being richer or poorer than others."

There are 2 main frameworks for understanding class, with a ton of complexity to each:

1. In terms of waged labour/the creation of surplus value and relationship to the means of production
2. More socio-culturally, as a series of frameworks for understanding social relations, including all kinds of material and representational factors from housing to language.

It's not just about 'being richer' or 'being poorer'.

It always seems the only people obsessed with class are those who say they are working class. Nobody else every gives a crap or starts posts with their 'status'.

And I'm with crushedvelvetcouch - we have no control over what class we are- you're born into it, and it is nigh on impossible to change that in Britain, so there's no reason whatsoever to be "proud" of being a particular class, nor to cover being another class- it's not attainable, so why waste precious time worrying about it?

@NaturalBornWoman Not tax deductible as a family. It's far too complicated to explain.

Ahem, that was "cover", thanks autocorrect.

Larger paycheque, larger outgoings. Bigger house, school fees, more expensive cars...

The forces of oppression are real, brothers and sisters

@Flaxmeadow preach.

FFS! Covet
Covet
Covet