Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5

Original poster

How many birthday presents do you get your child?

124 replies

00100001 · 12/04/2019 07:36

I'm just being nosey really.

We have always brought one smallish present for DS. As he was growing up it was things like a Dr Who colouring book and pens. A Ninjago. A starwars onesie.as he got older, he got some decent fineline pens for his art, a graphic novel he wanted, a wok (his request!).

He also has cake and chooses dinner.

My colleague said I was being tight! But it's not about that, it's about ALL THE FUCKING STUFF.

It's not like he goes without on his birthday as he will get around 15 other gifts. (GPs, aunts, uncles, neighbour, friends etc)

OP posts:

Imadehimlikethat · 12/04/2019 12:59

Christmas tends to be a full replacement of toys for the year
Why???

as I do this for everything even valentines for them
Why????????

KeptTheBeachesShipwreckFree · 12/04/2019 13:06

1 main gift, probably costing at the moment £20-40 tops, and a smaller gift for a couple more quid. After that, we usually get a cake, go for a day trip somewhere and then have a nice meal. Altogether we probably spend up to £150 on birthdays, less if possible.

SherlockSays · 12/04/2019 13:08

I'm quite shocked that a family meal (I.e. not just your DS that is being treated) is included in his birthday 'present'. I feel the same about the cake really.

No issue that you bought him a wok, my DH would have asked for something similar at his age so as long as he wants it it's fine, but I would have bought other things to accompany it too. It's not much of a birthday experience to unwrap a singular present.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General shopping

LLOE7 · 12/04/2019 13:19

My ds is 4 in June, he's asked for paw patrol things- the look out tower (his Aunty is getting him that), all the pups and their vehicles and the paw patroller. I've managed to get a lot of it secondhand in perfect condition for cheap, so I happily get him what he wants. Christmas we only get him a couple of presents as his two aunties go way over the top!

How many birthday presents do you get your child?

Original poster

00100001 · 12/04/2019 14:03

"So to me a colouring book and pencils is a mega stingy gift for your own child!"

Fair enough. But we thought it a thoughtful gift, perfect for him at the time. Aren't we always telling people it's the thought that counts when it comes to gifts?

OP posts:

Cookit · 12/04/2019 14:36

I get not wanting to get loads of stuff.

One high value item is what we’ve done so far and will carry on doing, it’s what I grew up with too.

Books and colouring things though I would not see as presents. If someone wants a book they can have it, it wouldn’t wait for a birthday or Christmas. Books and colouring stuff are the only things I’ll happily buy on demand.

SmarmyMrMime · 12/04/2019 14:47

It is relative to what they get from other people, parties, what they get through the year and timing.

DS 1 ends up with more from family because his birthday falls at a time of year where he sees family more. It is harder to plan birthday presents for him as it is close to Christmas and to give a fair balance of presents to meet his needs for the year within the space of a week.

DS2 has a spring birthday. If it's a year that they need something like a bike upgrade, I will tend to do it for both around DS2's birthday as in reality it would languish in the garage for months until then anyway.

Ultimately both get things that they need and want and I do tend to buy through the year rather than a big pile concentrated on birthday/ Christmas.

DS2 (6) is getting Minecraft download, picture books, hotwheels garage, Lego set (£30-40) and a fit bit. I'm also sewing his Beaver blanket to mark going up (already aquired a badge collection) This is all he will recieve on the day. He had also had a big party, cost shared with another classmate for a better activity (massive cluster of birthdays so lots of joint parties this year as there are too many birthdays to weekends for a couple of months)

Age is a factor in it too. Babies don't care. Toddlers/ young children want quantity over quality. As they get older value and desire become more influential, so at 15 getting the wok and specialised colouring book you really want matters more than splurging £xxx on a console for the sake of value. Prices per head for parties goes up, but heads go down.

NotQuiteSlimJim · 12/04/2019 15:12

One high value present plus 3/4 smaller ones. We also go away for the weekend prior or after (would do this anyway but use DCs birthdays as an excuse).

The value of presents rises as they get older but tends to be more practical/ needed items.

ReginaGeorgeous · 12/04/2019 19:09

Number of presents varies here. For example, last year for DD's third birthday she technically only received one present. However, that one item was one of those huge Wickey wooden climbing frames that we bought and grandparents contributed to the cost of.

She's just turned four and this year we bought her about £150 worth of toys and books that she'd asked for including lego sets, play doh sets and a Barbie with accessories.

She gets a cake, soft play party and a day out for her birthday as well but I don't include those within her present budget.

recklessgran · 13/04/2019 00:55

I definitely think it's tight OP, especially for a 15 year old, but that's just my opinion.We spend an awful lot more than that on our DD's. However, what you do is entirely up to you. If you couldn't think what to give him you could have got him a Nando's gift card for example to use later on top of the rest if he likes going there. Each to their own and your colleague had no right to comment.

StoppinBy · 13/04/2019 03:53

We are similar to you, small present, nice cake and the choice for tea....and we don't have big parties. They do get something from Grandma/Pa, Great Grandma and our neighbour as well.

Birthdays are not about presents, they are about people celebrating your birth and being grateful to have you in their lives.

sobeyondthehills · 13/04/2019 04:09

DS turned 7 in March.

Normally we spend a maximum of £50 on him (and if that when he was 1)

This year we spent a lot more on a lego set he really wanted. I doubt he will connect it, but we did this for a few reasons, it has been a tough year from his last birthday to this one to be honest and he has been a trooper, we came into a bit of money and the first thing I did was buy this lego set, it wont happen again, although I do expect it to start going up as prices increase

curlyrebel · 13/04/2019 04:17

I have to say that I consider my own parents very tight when it comes to giving my DB and I presents when growing up. I just remember receiving small stuff that I never had a need for. If it was clothes as a teenager I never liked the style because it was from where she shopped! My mum never asked me what I wanted. If she did I wouldn't have minded how little she spent.

I was from a small family so didn't get much in the way of other presents. Even though she did other stuff for my birthday like make a cake, when I saw what friends got I did think I got a bad deal. I think they could have afforded it but it went against their principals to spend money on 'things'. I couldn't wait to get a job when I was old enough so I could afford what I wanted.

Now as an adult, my MIL gives me more generous presents than my DM. My DD just turned two. We spent a lot of money on her party bc my DH is from a big family and a party is expected. But DD got so many presents from all the guests it was quite ridiculous. I plan on topping up the money she received with some of my own to put in her savings. But in the future I will make sure she at least gets something special she wants or needs.

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 13/04/2019 04:24

Absolutely only one gift, they have grown up to be totally unmaterialistic

PhillipeFellope · 13/04/2019 07:43

I could easily spend a small fortune. Birthdays, Christmas, Easter. But it's all relative. Ds doesn't get anything off my husbands side at all. And a present off my grandma and auntie. DM buys stuff but never wraps it so it's never presented as a gift and then it lives at her house anyway.

He might have a party this year and that will run into a few hundred, but if we can afford it at the time then I'll spend it.

If your ds is happy with a wok and a graphic novel and that's what he wanted then that's all that matters, surely!? Happy birthday to him!

PhillipeFellope · 13/04/2019 07:45

Absolutely only one gift, they have grown up to be totally unmaterialistic

I got loads growing up and still grew up to be totally unmaterialistic. I think it's down to the child's personality as well as parental attitude.

Nicpem1982 · 13/04/2019 07:50

Dd will be 5 in sept she is having a class party so will potentially have gifts from friends.

From us shes asked for a build a bear so shell have that and a couple of outfits aswell as a couple of new board games ive got earmarked on amazon.

We dont buy clothes as gifts however this may change if dd wants a particularly special item when shes older.

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 13/04/2019 08:50

Absolutely only one gift, they have grown up to be totally unmaterialistic

I think you need to be careful with this. Not saying this is the case for your child but..... I was brought up with one token gift and would have been described as "unmaterialistic" by my parents.
Actually I was/am self denying and anxious about "deserving" new things.
I our case it was justified by poverty so understandable.

nancy75 · 13/04/2019 10:03

Absolutely only one gift
Why so rigid? What if there were 2 things that you know they would love?
I can understand not wanting to be drowning in stuff but sometimes I think some people are just tight.

OdeToDiazepam · 13/04/2019 10:06

Ds is 4 today! I admit I go a bit overboard but it's partly because of in the past, not having money to spend, and I don't get him toys in between

He got from me
Kids tablet
Bike
Train
Train track
Backpack
Props pig toy
Pj masks toy
Thomas mini thing

Snog · 14/04/2019 10:32

If ds gets iPads etc on random days but only a wok for his birthday then you are just doing this the other way around to other people.

PippilottaLongstocking · 14/04/2019 10:39

Unless there’s something big that’s been specifically asked for I usually do a couple of books, a nice outfit or pyjamas, some Lego, something educational (eg science kit) and maybe another small toy

Los77 · 15/04/2019 14:18

I only have one DS who is 10and I spent around £1000 in his birthday, this includes gifts and a party. Same for xmas.. But each to their own, I don't think there is a general rule, its what people can afford and what people want to spend.

outpinked · 15/04/2019 16:16

I’d say I get them 5/6 presents, usually adds up to £100ish. We all go out for the day as a family and do something the birthday boy/girl wants to do which also costs a further £80-100.

Never done birthday parties.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5