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Original poster

Am I mean to not take baby to classes?

39 replies

freemefromacne · 25/03/2019 15:40

I have a 10 week old baby. If I had a pound for every time someone has asked ‘what classes are you doing with him?’... and then there’s the look of disapproval when I say ‘none’.

I’m sure baby sensory, sing and sign etc etc are great, but I have no desire to fill my days with these classes yet. Baby seems happy kicking about on his play mat at home, going for walks in the pram, and sleeping. He can go to classes when he’s a bit older and can actually stay awake to appreciate them. It doesn’t help that DS is at his happiest when he can kick about with no clothes on, which would probably be frowned upon in public.

I do worry that I’m being mean though. I’ve been a nanny for so many years pre-baby and attended so many of these bloody classes that I feel my tolerance for them has worn out already. Poor DS.

OP posts:
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 25/03/2019 15:42

I think its nice to go to the odd class but 10 weeks is really little. When would you want to take him to one?

Seeline · 25/03/2019 15:42

It's absolutely fine. When you think he will benefit, or you are in need of them, then that's the time to start.

MummySharkBabyShark · 25/03/2019 15:42

Nope. The babies don’t need them. If you are happy enjoy your class free days.

I don’t do classes either.

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BellatrixLeStrangest · 25/03/2019 15:43

You're not being mean at all. He's 10 weeks old, he won't even remember what you did with him at this age. The reason why I did classes wasn't so much for my kids but for my own sanity so I could sit with other mums in the same position as me and have adult conversation. It really helped my mental health as I'm not very good at being alone for long periods of time.
If you're happy in holding off on the groups then do what's best for you.

happymummy12345 · 25/03/2019 15:43

I never took my son to any at all, nor will I take any children I hope to have in the future to any. That sort of thing is not for me at all, I'd hate it so I'd never go.

frugi · 25/03/2019 15:43

Classes are more for you than for the baby. If you want to meet other parents and have some adult conversation then go to some, if not don’t bother.

Ilovewillow · 25/03/2019 15:43

Nope there is plenty of time for classes if you want! I took my first to a number of classes but in hindsight they were probably more for my benefit at the beginning!! My son went to some when he was a little older and our Nanny took him, I apologise as she is probably like you now and fed up with them. I think the only class they both loved and got a lot out of was swimming!

sue51 · 25/03/2019 15:44

Does a 10 week old baby need classes? I used classes as a means to get to know other parents in my area. It was for my benefit rather than my babies.

WeepingWillowWeepingWino · 25/03/2019 15:44

He's weeny!

I think I started that kind of thing when DD was about 9 months and my NCT friends started returning to work and I was on my own most of the time. It was sometimes as much for me as for DD.

NerrSnerr · 25/03/2019 15:46

I took mine to groups from a young age, nothing fancy- just local toddler group and library singing. It wasn't for the baby in the early days it was so I met other local mums.

I found that it was easier to make friends and chat to people with a tiny baby as everyone asks about them etc.

HappyPunky · 25/03/2019 15:47

They just need sleep and lots of cuddles from you at that age.
I did classes and activities with a set time from when DD was about 18 months and having a nap in the afternoon so I knew I could plan things for each morning and wouldn't be missing things I paid for or stressing myself out waking her up for a class.

Until then I did Parks and toddler soft play, the things you can go to whenever you fancy with no commitment.

Original poster
freemefromacne · 25/03/2019 15:48

Yes I think they can be great for parents who need to get out and socialise. I am not one of these people Grin

OP posts:
BendingSpoons · 25/03/2019 15:51

At 10 weeks the classes are for you. There is plenty of time to go. Definitely enjoy what you are doing for now. And talk to some second/third time mums instead! I have signed up for baby massage for DS when he is 10 weeks as I fancied it, but otherwise he spends his days following DD around e.g. being pushed to the playground, in his bouncy chair watching us play at home.

CakeNinja · 25/03/2019 15:51

I was advised to do some courses with my first as I was classed a ‘young mum’. I went to one - once! Never returned, it was hideous, like an NCT cliquey group!!
I’m of the mindset that most adults do them for themselves really, I can see the benefit of having a routine and some structure to your day if you’re that way inclined. It’s a way to see if you can find some new avenues of friendship to help you adjust to your new life too if it’s your first and if your life is now very different to that of your existing friends.
Not for me though, not until they were going to get something out of it. I took them to toddler groups (although this was nice for me to be able to talk to other adults during the day) when they were a year or so because my friend ran it and I knew lots of the other parents that went.

Flamingosnbears · 25/03/2019 15:53

This is the problem health visitors in particular LOVE to glamourise these classes and yes you get ground upon for not attending... What happened to mum knows best?!

Ambi · 25/03/2019 15:58

The only one that was useful for me was baby massage and I was the only one who turned up to that which was great having 1 to 1 teaching.
But then I'm an antisocial sod.

anniehm · 25/03/2019 16:25

The class is for the parents! Seriously, anything under 2 isn't for the benefit of the kid who would prefer to play with their own stuff or feed the ducks the park.

Parker231 · 25/03/2019 16:30

I didn’t go to any. I went back to work when DT’s were six months old and before that age I don’t think they get anything from them and I wasn’t keen on spending time with other parents comparing babies. Preferred to go out to see friends.

hopelesslyromantic93 · 25/03/2019 16:37

I go to baby yoga, rhythm time and a swimming class. Honestly it's more for me than my daughter. I'd go stir crazy stuck in the house and it helps my mental health to have some structure and routine! It's also nice to be able to meet other people while you're busy doing things too so there isn't the awkwardness of the baby groups where you just sit and talk Haha. Definitely don't think the classes are a necessity so you're not mean at all!

happypotamus · 25/03/2019 16:53

No, I didn't take DDs to any. They are now 4 and 7 and seem reasonably intelligent and well-adjusted without them. 10 week babies get no benefit whatsoever from baby classes. They are only a benefit for parents who are fed up and lonely at home on maternity leave. I was too antisocial for them, and they are expensive. I went to a free group at the children's centre with mine when they were a bit older than 10 weeks with activities that sound a lot like what my friend now pays £7 a week for at baby sensory class.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 25/03/2019 17:03

Didn’t take my third to any. I was just too busy with two older toddlers plus him.

He never suffered for it, he’s the most popular child and very clever.

YouBoggleMyMind · 25/03/2019 17:07

I didn't take my DS to anything until he was 1. Partly cos we were advised not for medical reasons but partly cos it wasn't my cup of tea at all. HV kept talking to me about baby massage and I had no interest.

SurgeHopper · 25/03/2019 17:08

Total waste of time IMHO

spiderlight · 25/03/2019 17:14

We did nothing at all until DS was about nine months old, and even then it was just a baby and toddler group once a week. Didn't do 'classes' of any form until Rugby Tots when he was 2. Has made not one jot of difference. He was perfectly happy at home with me, coming out to walk the dogs, watching the washing machine go round etc.

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 25/03/2019 17:23

Dd (2nd child) went to her first activity at 2 days old. However that more for my benefit than anyone else's (it was Messy Church and there was a cooked meal at the end of it). If you are both happy at home, stay at home. She's 9 months now and we do a lot but even now, a lot of that is for my benefit rather than hers. I started at 3 months with dc1 and again that was mostly for my benefit until at least 18 months.

Both mine have been pretty feral and hard to get to sleep at home so going out was the easier option. If it wasn't, we wouldn't do half as much as we do.

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