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Original poster

Is it selfish to buy a rolex

130 replies

Summeriscomin · 26/02/2019 20:10

When you have a family to support?

My OH wants a Rolex for his 30th birthday. £9500 which he wants me to pay a small contribution to £500 or so. Which will leave me with not much to spend on him.

He’ll pay a larger portion out of savings he’s accumulated over time. And then the rest will be paid on a monthly direct debit.

I said he can do as he pleases as he works hard but I did portray my confusion of why he would want one. Perhaps as a 50/60th present to himself when his dependents have grown but he has a young family to support.

It comes across to me as selfish as it’s to portray an image to others but who cares what other strangers think. In my opinion the money could be spent on better things.

He justifies it that he works hard (he does), he/we can afford it & that he’s always wanted one. And that it’s an asset and won’t lose money.

So who do you think is right in this Situation. Happy to accept I may be wrong but I’m the least flashiest person in the world. Don’t own nor want any designer things so I just don’t get it.

OP posts:
PQ77 · 26/02/2019 21:13

I have about £20,000 worth of jewellery that costs over £500/year to insure - and that’s shopping around every year to get best deal. Rolex’s are a target to muggers - a guy was killed for one last year near us in London. That’s why my husband and I don’t wear them, even though we could afford them, we have much cheaper Omegas. Even then the servicing on an omega can be £500 a go.

mummyhaschangedhername · 26/02/2019 21:22

Personally for me it's a no but like others our income isn't that high.

The jeweller May offer 0% offers, a lot do. If the watch isn't going to be used then jus a massive investment and Rolex watches increase in value. But then what's the point if he won't use it?

user1497787065 · 26/02/2019 21:28

The thing with a Rolex unlike other watches of 2k-3k is that the Rolex retains its value.! Cheaper/fashion watches don't.

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ShirleyPhallus · 26/02/2019 21:38

Best hope you never lose your job, your car gets written off, boiler packs up etc....that’s what credit should be for.

That’s what my savings are for ;)

Butteredghost · 26/02/2019 21:52

Hmm not sure about this one.

Yes it seems crazy. But people do spend money on things they don't need all the time. Often it seems justified because, for example, they need a car. But they dont "need" a new top of the range car. They need food - but don't need to eat out 5x per week (adding up to £1000s each year) The watch can't be justified in that way but really its no more wasteful.

Have you got any expensive jewellery such as an engagement ring? It probably didn't cost £10k sure, but even if it cost a few k isn't that just as bad? If you haven't got anything like that then I see it as more unfair.

Ultimately though the fact that you are putting it on finance would mean it's a no from me.

Butteredghost · 26/02/2019 21:54

But your main dilemma seems to be how you will afford a birthday gift in addition to your contribution to the watch - definitely don't get him anything else. A rolex is enough!

Candace19 · 26/02/2019 22:08

Will you get £10k spent on your birthday?

PresentImperfect · 26/02/2019 22:19

£5k on a watch and £5k on a fab holiday for everyone to enjoy?!

I suppose if he spends £x (lots) but not £10k he will always wish he had spent that extra.

Seems mad to me but I'm not flashy either. I have a lot in the bank through an inheritance and just feel I should be sensible. Buying designer watches/ handbags seems a bit frittery.

I'd be concerned about safety though if you could tell it's a Rolex. I wouldn't have a clue but I imagine some muggers might.

itbemay1 · 26/02/2019 22:40

I bought my DH a Rolex for his 30th, didn't spend as much as £10k though. He sold it 10 years later for various reasons. I wouldn't spend that much on anything like that again, it's a frivolity, fine if you have the money but to get it ok finance seems a bit extravagant.

BirdieInTheHand · 26/02/2019 23:20

Assuming you gave a comfortable amount of savings my test for would I make an expensive purchase is what would I have to forgo.

So if I wanted to buy an expensive watch but it means we couldn't afford a holiday then no expensive watch.

If however making the purchase meant I couldn't be a new handbag then maybe the watch wins?

I really think everything else needs to have been covered off before you spend on luxury accessories

whitehorsesdonotlie · 26/02/2019 23:22

So your h wants to spend 10k on a watch that tells the time like a phone does, for free?

Um.

It’s a no from me.

icouldwriteabook · 26/02/2019 23:26

Sorry, you say you can afford it but you will be taking out a credit card (loan) to pay the rest of it off?

If you could afford it, you would have the £9500 plus insurance etc ready to be handed over.

You can’t afford it, he just wants to believe he can.

Wouldn’t it be nice to spend savings on you and those children going on amazing holidays doing things ‘normal’ families dont, being comfortable , paying mortgage off or having a nice car? A watch will literally sit on his wrist, unless he’s wearing short sleeves and has a sign pointing to his watch saying ‘rolex’ nobody will notice, and nobody will care either way. He’s not any better of a man.

His Rolex won’t go to the grave with him (unless he requested it I suppose), but his memories of great holidays and experiences will. But then again it’s his bloody life and he only gets one, if he wants to be selfish and you won’t be eating beans on toast for years then why not, who are we to judge Confused

BarbaraofSevillle · 26/02/2019 23:31

Why do watches increase in value?

If for some bizarre reason a second hand one costs more than a new one, wouldn't you just buy a new one instead?

The cost of servicing them sound insane.

Stuckandsad · 26/02/2019 23:39

Where I'm from its bad luck to buy a man (that you're married to) a watch so I would give him a big fat nope

HelmutFrontbut · 26/02/2019 23:50

I agree with Stuck Watches are cursed and will bring nothing but misery.

Jsmith99 · 27/02/2019 00:03

Why do watches increase in value? If for some bizarre reason a second hand one costs more than a new one, wouldn't you just buy a new one instead?

Most watches don’t increase in value, but a few do, and most of them are made by Rolex.

Demand for some Rolex models such as the Daytona, Submariner & GMT Master far exceeds supply, particularly if the watches are made from stainless steel rather than gold. You can’t just walk into Watches of Switzerland and buy one. At best, there is a waiting list of several years. More usually, the waitlist will be closed to new customers.

A few years ago, I walked past the Rolex dealership at Munich airport. A GMT Master with the black & blue bezel was for sale in the window for €6500. I knew this was a rare model, but I was running late and stoping to buy it would have meant missing my flight, so I didn’t. Had I bought it, it would be worth at least £10k today.

Jsmith99 · 27/02/2019 00:06

Contd...

I still kick myself for not missing my flight every time I see one!

appointmentsaretheworst · 27/02/2019 01:07

If you wanted to drop ten grand on yourself what would his reaction be?

dreichuplands · 27/02/2019 01:10

Some watches are meant to be limited edition collectors items, so they come with numbers and certificates. If you manage to buy one pre owned just around the time they stop making them it should either hold is value or increase. The watch I bought my DH 15 years ago is worth more now than I paid and it is an omega which is a cheaper brand than a Rolex I believe. I personally don't know much about watches but I know these collector ones do very well. My DH wears one daily and they bring him pleasure.

RaffertyFair · 27/02/2019 01:33

You say you have separate savings and he wants to spend his savings on the Rolex and pay the balance by credit card.

Presumably this leaves only your savings for emergencies? How is that fair? Or is there another pot of money for the broken boiler etc? Do you not have any joint savings?

You also say the cost is equivalent yo 10% of your joint income. So it is considerably more than 10% of his income. Incomprehensible to me.

I cant imagine

Luckystar777 · 27/02/2019 01:41

Yeah it is selfish, and very dumb.

toomuchtooold · 27/02/2019 05:37

What will you be spending your 9.5k on when it's your 30th?

Original poster
Summeriscomin · 27/02/2019 06:24

So to answer a few questions -

He has “his savings” which he built up whilst we were together. About half of the value of the watch.

We then have “our savings” which we both consciously saved and sacrificed for. It’s about £16,000. However I was not working for most of it. Although I was consciously scrimping and caring for 2 kids so he could work hard, get promotions and even move away for 9 months with his job. So I do consider this joint.

Anyway we want to get married and he wants this watch. So about 6 months ago I done the math and realised I had to go back to work otherwise we couldn’t afford it all.

Now I work 32 hours a week whilst he continues with his demanding job. There’s little time for us and he’s extremely dedicated to the job. I struggle with the pressure of work, kids especially when he travels and I need to be out of the house for 7am with two kids.

Anyway the thought just dawned on me that if he didn’t want this watch then that money that will go towards the watch could actually just go towards our wedding and we wouldn’t be in this situation. And I concluded that he was selfish to want such an expensive watch.

His defence is that spending the savings on a wedding isn’t the same as spending it on a watch as the money on the wedding will be gone. The money on the watch will always be there in case of hard times.

Sorry if I am drip feeding.

Also no I certainly won’t get nor want £10k spent on me for my birthday.

He said he thinks about and looks at the watch (online) everyday.

There’s lots of stuff he does which is great - supportive and family oriented but there’s also lots of stuff he does which I feel are selfish or as though he has no kids. And it makes me sad. And the Rolex situation is one of them.

OP posts:
Original poster
Summeriscomin · 27/02/2019 06:26

The youngest child is 2 btw - If that makes any difference

We also have our house which is mortgaged.

And a joint car which is considered a “nice” and quite flashy car - again which he picked and wanted. I would have been happy with any car.

OP posts:
Original poster
Summeriscomin · 27/02/2019 06:28

I have none of my “own” savings. Unfortunately

OP posts:
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