Very intelligent but failure in the workplace?

[dublinruth]

I was a very clever child. Scholarships, MENSA, etc. Everyone thought I had an exceptionally bright future.

Except.. my intelligence doesn't really mean anything in the workplace. It hasn't translated to career success. I'm now ten years into my career, doing specialised admin work that bores me silly but pays OK.

Has anyone else found that being intelligent just doesn't translate into being good at work. I feel such a failure and see people I went to school with having great careers and can't help but to feel a huge amount of jealousy.

Has anyone else found this?

Someone mentioned “lacking resilience” and I think this is the nub with me. I’m not resilient at all! My job is a good professional one but I could have gone so much further if I’d applied myself, or if I hadn’t have several bouts of depression that made me leave my academic career.

Top of the class, Mensa tested 150+ (though somewhat sceptical about that) bored at school and left asap. Sufficient resilience and common sense to lone parent successfully and enjoyably ... work was OK when I could work alone, always mentioned in reviews as a good team player.

I can't network to save my life, and am lost and unhappy in any role that demands the use of office politics. Seen as obstructive because I don't want to climb the ladder.

I was probably in the same sort of place as you ten years after graduating. I remember having a performance review and being told I had to learn how to play the game, and that although my work was excellent I never looked busy enough (because it was v. easy) and I needed to work on that!

Another 8 years on and I'm in a totally different place. I quit my safe job and started doing contract work. I still don't play the game but as a contractor it's not really expected. My unwillingness to be a people pleaser that was looked down upon previously is now valued, I'm not afraid to be the lone voice in the room explaining why something won't work. Nobody expects me to show an interest in managing people to progress. They value that I can pick up something quickly and get things done.

The resilience issue is important. It's notable how many famous 'child prodigies' were unsuccessful adults - either because they were sick of being made a spectacle and rebelled against their parents, or else they were so defined by their 'cleverness' that they couldn't bear to fail and so wouldn't try.

My brother was a very prodigious child and my mum was urged to send him to special schools for gifted children etc, but she didn't want him hothoused - she just wanted him to pick up better social skills and enjoy a normal childhood, and she was right. He did well academically, turned out to be a socially well adjusted person (which I bet he wouldn't have been if hothoused) and has a good career in the civil service.

When I meet people who tell me their A level results - 20 or 30 years after they sat them - as a statement of how clever they are really despite their job/level/salary, I do think the modern obsession with academic success drives this view that only the most academic will succeed.
The reality is that luck, opportunity, tenacity, people skills and average intelligence is "all" you need to succeed at a career.

That is exactly what I mean about good GCSEs/a levels etc really only demonstrating that you are good at passing those tests. Which isn’t a bad thing and may or may not be related to your intelligence but says very little about what sort of workplace or career will suit you

I suspect part of it is schools’ requirement to get results so emphasis is put on the importance of the results but actually it is often just a hurdle to clear to get to the next stage

This isn’t to say that people shouldn’t try to do as well as they can or make use of their intelligence in whatever way they want - but there are different definitions of “success” and academic success at school is just one area

Same here. Bright, great uni, good degree but then never real got off the ground. I suffer from really severe and frequent depressions. Took me decades to realise they held me back at work, as i could never commit to a career, but had to stick with easy to abandon jobs whenever the cloud descended. In some wasy i do very well - I have my own small business and am paid OK - way above minimum wage, but still only work very part time as I need lots of time off to keep the depression at bay, and I also choose to spend a lot of time with DC to try and finallyt break the cycle of shit parenting passing on long term psychological damage. I hope it's worked...

The thing is, if you want to make a good career out of intelligence and/or academic ability, you should surely choose a career that requires, even trades upon, intelligence and/or academic ability. Something like academia, or a technical area of law.

Most fields of work do not fit these criteria, they're about getting things done, one way or another. Being pleasant, present, ambitious and assertive are going to help achieve that. Intelligence per se may just distract you, be off-putting to others, or simply irrelevant.

Wow, it seems like there are a lot of us in the same boat.

Re anything else at play, I think it might be partially down to not being outwardly confident enough and also not "playing the game" of presenteeism.

I know I'm good at my job and I can get the work done very quickly. It makes no sense for me to sit there making something last hours when I can power through it quickly and get it done. For the same reason I won't stay very late and arrive very early just for the sake of being there - if there's work to do, no problem. But I won't waste my life sat at a desk after hours pretending to be busy when I'm not.

I also think confidence plays a part. Although I know I'm good at my job, it doesn't take much for me to doubt it or to think that someone else is better than me or knows more than me or would handle a stressful situation better than I do.

Yep. I also think that extrovert qualities are seen as synonymous with leadership.

I like to hang back/observe/take a world view and haven’t put myself forward historically. I also HATE office politics and cant play the game. That’s a failing in the work place.

But I think having the awareness of where I’m going wrong means I’m more at peace with it. I actually love my job and am (luckily) not hugely motivated by money.

And actually the biggest lesson is that I shouldn’t stress about dd (who has amazing people skills) not being very academic.

I have seen many people get promoted beyond their competence through ingratiating themselves with their superiors, nothing to do with ability. My advice would be to apply for better jobs, get well prepared if shortlisted, and act as if you know what you're doing if you get the job. It takes a bit of courage but as my DH is fond of saying 'people take you at your own estimation'.

Exceptionally bright people and mental health problems often go hand in hand. (Funnily enough, I was thinking this the other day watching ‘A Beautiful Mind’.)

I was told at school by a headmaster that he was sure that I would ‘find success’ and I was very conscientious, academically able and a bit of a swot to be honest. I went to a grammar school and while I didn’t achieve anything like an Oxbridge degree, I was certainly given ample opportunities to do well and I achieved a good degree. My career in publishing and copywriting has been ok, and I have a decade of it behind me but recently, owing to many health problems I haven’t been able to work for nearly 18 months. I’m very lacking in confidence as a result, and having a head injury and drug induced involuntary movement disorder hasn’t exactly helped either. 🙄

I’m sure if I wanted to, I could reach my full potential if I really put my mind to it. I think I have probably missed the boat though, and it makes me so sad to think I can’t really see my future potential being fulfilled now thanks to my health problems and the limitations they bring. If I didn’t have such intense social anxiety then I am sure this might help too.

My DD is my ray of hope and sunshine though. At only 8, she is a ‘model pupil’, and academically brilliant and the very thing I wished that I had been too; confident, self assured and outgoing. I’m sure she is the ‘me’ that could have been (and never was). I’m really hoping and shines and excels in the workplace and her career with her combined great personality and intellect. She will fly and go far if she does, and i would be immensely proud of her. (No pressure there then..!)

Over-the-counter everything is definitely a problem. Success in the workplace is often related to clear decision-making skills. I analyse every possibility to death.

Lack of common sense is not a problem, for me anyway. I have way more common sense than my more-successful DH.

Over-analysing. Stupid auto-correct

Post grad qualification here but stuck in admin land...combination of timing, location and personal relationships putting a spanner in the works mostly.

Mid 40s now and pretty much resigned to making the most of it and just hoping I can whittle down to part time hours/retire at the earliest possible opportunity (highly unlikely but I can dream)!

Reverse here. Regarded as a bit thick at school although that was cleverly divined by me as part of homework avoidance. Dropped out of uni after a term. Somewhere aling the line I mastered doing just enough of the right stuff to make an impression. I always day dreamed a bit but also had bursts of focussed productivity.

I loved work when I started. Work was easy. A bit like school - mapping a classroom, head down, working out who was friend and who foe, what pleased and who needed pleasing. Watching words, seeking gaps to be filled. What to I need to do to get that job. 10 mins at the end of the day reviewing whether anything vital hadn't been done and plugging it. 10 mins at the beginning before the phones started checking the sands and what might have shifted.

Am on 2nd career now after an 8 year break. Started at scratch now director. I still keep myself and my thoughts to myself but can work a room and smile. Sometimes I hear myself in front of a room and wonder how I manage to spout so much knowledgeable shit on the hoof.

I was never academic and hated homework, esp projects. Looking back and this has been identified in iq type tests, I analyse a lot of info v quickly and grind down to risk and opportunity fast. I also read people fast.

Interestingly dd has been diagnosed with adhd/add - at 17 and she is fiersomely academic. With hindsight I have all the traits. However no anxiety or depression and no asd traits which dd has. I worry for her.

Again, the perfect headgirly types from school never really broke the mould. Teachers, nurses, physios, etc. But there was never a hint of maverick in them.

I went to a shitty failing London comp, got Cs and Ds at A level and a 2:2 degree in Chemistry. I never had anything extra curricular as my parents had no money. I'm now on a 6 figure salary still in my early 40s, earning more in stock options than I do cash bonuses and work in one of the most progressive technology companies in the world. I am the only woman in a senior rank role in an executive team of 40 men.

This is what I'll be teaching my kids:

• How to give excellent interviews. This is probably no.1
• How to self promote especially on LinkedIn
• How to network
• Be humble, gracious
• Be cautious but fearless
• How to talk the talk and intelligently talk. Far more important than written communication.
• How to give great speeches and presentations
• How to give a firm handshake
• Show gravitas, presence
• How to influence and make friends
• How to prioritise and get shit done
• Organise oneself
• Be up to date with current affairs business news
• Claim the theatre as yours
• Be an excellent dresser right down to Montblanc pen, wrist watch and luggage. People employ their tribe.
• Be fast to react
• Lean forward at the table.
• Sit next to the boss.
• Being intelligent is on the last of this list.

All above are my observations after working for 20 years in the City with some of the biggest influencers, earners, CXOs I've known both male and female. I've copied and learned their traits and I've not had to look for jobs last 10 years. They headhunt me.

It look me a long time and a few false starts to find my niche (which I stumbled into accidentally). Just because it isn’t working now, don’t write yourself off forever.

Oh and don't stay in same job or company for more than 2 years. Biggest pay jump and career ladder rises have been between companies than within a company.

It sounds like you just need to find the right environment and career, do you have any thoughts on what kind of work you might enjoy? Whether you prefer a fairly regimented role eg set hours, very clear expectations etc or the chance for more flexibility and variety? My friend is exactly the same, extremely intelligent but never really found her niche until recently; she always did well in jobs but nothing exceptional and was largely bored and felt unfulfilled. She took a chance on working for a smaller company which had flexible working, chances to put forward new ideas etc and loves it. Maybe put the feelers out? Never too late, and sounds like your job now is good- but if you want a change and to try something new go for it!

@CookieDoughKid that's an interesting, honest list. What did you mean by 'claim the theatre as yours'?

No Im kind of the opposite. Messed about through school now Im an ‘academic in a uni dept’. Funny old world isn’t it?

I'm clever but viewed school as bullshit so never put any effort in. Results decent but not amazing. I cared about work far more, my work defines me and is an obsession. I'm good with people in a professional capacity (i am bad at networking and office politics tho), confident, decisive etc. But i made the error of pursuing what interested me more than thinking practically, which hasnt worked out, so i effectively wasted a decade and am starting from scratch.

I'm never fully utilised by a company, even when i had a fairly high powered, stressful job with a lot of responsibility at 19, i felt like i was twiddling my thumbs 90% of the time. I need sonething more fast paced.

I’ve got a saying for some folk who brag about their intelligence at work, But can never seem to cope with the job at hand... they have the brain the size of planets but can’t tie their shoe laces.

I am thinking of one particular fellow who would delight us all with his impressive knowledge but also make rude and condescending remarks about people less intelligently able. Yet couldn’t seem to fathom how deadlines, photocopiers or customer service worked. He didn’t get very far and was very bitter about it. He felt he deserved better because he was clever.

There also some folk regardless of intelligence who will only work to their job description, will not put in extra hours, or go out of their way to assist. Moan about co-workers who aren’t doing ‘x, y or z properly’ without seeing the bigger picture of why they didn’t do ‘x, y or z’. They accuse others of brown-nosing and moan when they are over looked for promotions. I don’t know why they assume length of service means a promotion either.

It needs to be understood from a very early age that being the most intelligent in your class does not automatically make you the best in class.

The ones who succeed in life, are the ones who don’t moan at a challenge (a good way to prove yourself), the confident, the socially charming, reliable and optimistic. You also have to understand how businesses work, profit, loss and overheads etc. People are not employing you out of the goodness of their heart.

I wouldn’t necessarily fit myself into the successful category. Although I once one a promotion by not being afraid to approach senior management with a plan to overhaul our department with a proper business plan. They weren’t even looking for it to be overhauled but if it was going to save them time and money they were very interested. But that was then and I’m working in a support role now, life circumstances mean I can’t put my heart and soul into a career. I find it frustrating but there isn’t much I can do about it so have to learn to accept it cheerfully.

I think you need to realise that boring menial jobs, are boring for most people whether intelligent or not and you are not exempt from working in that role because you are academically gifted. I’m sure we all sometimes hope we don’t end up photocopying, answering phones and cleaning work areas for 45 years but if that’s our destiny, try and accept it and use your spare time to pursue your academic/music/artistic/athletic/dance/acting talents.