What are you/were you doing in your late 20s?

[Antifreeze]

I'm in my late 20s and frankly having a bit of a wobble. Things seem so much more dull and more serious than they did a few years ago. It's all mortgages, marriage and babies on the cards - I say this as a happily married person! The friends I used to go out with late into the night don't seem interested in it anymore and seem to have easily transitioned into this next phase of life. I look at people who are 21,22, and feel horribly envious of their carefree lifestyle and of the lifestyle I had at that age. Everyone my age just seems to do the same things, work, Netflix, gym, sleep, repeat. As silly as it sounds, I feel old and not much fun anymore and 'adult' life is really quite samey and tedious, even with hobbies and travel.

What are/were you doing in your late 20s? Perhaps I'm just immature and need to get on with it, but I keep wishing I could turn the clock back.

I'm actually really surprised at the number of people on here who say they were/are married, mortgaged and parents in their late twenties

Me too, wonder if it's a generational thing (I'm nearly 50).

I was doing my PhD in my late 20s, living in shared flats, not much money but all disposable cash and busy social life with lots of clubbing (T'was the era of Britpop and New Labour). Then postdocing into my 30s with the moving about the country that that involved. DH and I got married at 29, didn't buy a house until we were in our 30s (once I chucked in postdocing) and had our first child just before I turned 37, had our last at 41. Most of my Uni friends had kids in their 30s & 40s.

In our late 20s we were still kids ourselves, no-one was in a rush to settle down and have kids and a mortgage or even had a great career plan. I am partly horrified and partly impressed by the millennials at work who are so focussed so young.

While I think it's important to save some money in your 20s, particularly if you want to buy property I was surprised at the no. of people who settled down in their 20s. All of my friends and family worked hard and travelled in their 20s. Those of us who married and had children started in our 30s. Some advice I got from a GP friend was kind/useful. He said from 35 your fertility starts to reduce and often those he met with fertility issues didn't know this. Enjoy your 20s! Take (and print) loads of photos of your adventures. And don't loose them on an old laptop like me!!!

On the one hand I'm bored with all of the constraints of Monday to Friday office life and all of these 'adult' responsibilities. But I feel scared that if I don't get on the property ladder now or advance my career or save money then I'll look back and really regret not setting myself up well for my 30s and 40s.

I feel like so many of my friends are buying houses and having babies because it's the 'done' thing to do and I don't want to fall into that. I want to actually figure out what it is I want and also have a bit of fun and be carefree rather than always planning the next move!

Not me @Spanishwife. I've lived in different countries, including here in the UK and I've had a blast in each one. I've loved every minute of my life so far 😁
Next plan is to upgrade the campervan and do a leisurely tour of Europe when we retire in a couple of years time.

Sounds amazing @auslander, I really am a big fan of making choices based on happiness (sounds sooo obvious but shocking how many people don't!)

What do you mean 'not me'?

At 26 I was in a horribly abusive relationship and had DD at almost 28. I was technically still with her father but no support from him whatsoever. Met DH when she was a few months old, he had a 3 year old DS from his own ex wife who'd been incredibly controlling. Left ex and moved with DH. Settled and we had DS2 almost 3 years later. I'm 40 now (feel very old) and could not be happier.

Thing is, my early 20s were actually brilliant, got degree from top university, very happy etc. It was just that I had no clue what constituted as a normal relationship (I grew up in care and, despite ending up with an absolutely wonderful foster family when I was 14, had a lot of damage done previously that had gone unnoticed).

Hmm let's see...

Having broken up my engagement, quit my teaching job and crashed my car in the space of 2 months, I then proceeded to date some horrendous men and get depression.

Wasn't until I was 27 that I met OH, got pregnant and had DS.

Safe to say the latter part of my late 20s was the best.

I never really went out loads - did a fair bit of that at uni. But now I'm in my early 30s, it's not like I'm over the sodding hill 🙄 we still have a few festivals and nights out in us yet 😂😂

I'm 27 - stable long term relationship although not married, we own our home, have a dog and have professional careers.

I Netflix, exercise, cook, travel, ski, scuba dive, go to festivals and gigs, see friends, see family, go for long walks, have people over to stay, throw parties (with beer pong and djs), throw parties (with canapés/polite conversation), read, and I'm writing a book.

Some weekends I get the 'I'm too old for this shit' feeling when my younger friends are up for a big night out with loads of drinking, others I have a whale of a time and don't want it to end!

Just because you're restricted by 9-5 doesn't mean you can't have a blast at this time in your life. You just need to find what works.

It was in response to your ' going through the motions ' @Spanishwife

I drank a lot of gin, had a lot of sex, wore lots of lovely clothes and went on lots of lovely holidays. Met DH at 29, married at 32, first DC at 34. I now have no money, no sex, am too tired to drink gin, and I can’t even fit an ankle into any of my lovely clothes!

In my late 20's I was studying / getting married / travelling... didn't have kids until my mid 30's.
in my early 40's now and still like to go out occasionally!
Can you take some time out of work to see the world a bit?
It's harder to travel lots with kids so make the most of your freedom!

At 26 I was teaching English abroad, then back packing. Came back at 27 because I decided to sort my life out. Went back to uni to do my postgrad. Finished early thirties.

Drank a lot, didn't sleep much. Got together with DH when I was 26 and we travelled a lot together. Bought our first flat when I was 31, I think.