What things do you see and think are just pretentious?

[SneakyGremlins]

For me it's cafés with "no WiFi here, talk to each other!" signs.

A) I'll probably go elsewhere thanks

B) My best friend likes to sit on his phone anyway because they don't realise mobile data exists.

I just find it so wanky - if I'm going out to spend money on a drink and several pieces of cake then I'm going out to relax. If I want to be on my phone then I will be.

@BartonHollow
I think they were unique, sadly. I like First Aid Kit for the harmonies but they don't have the same kind of angst.

I'm pretentious I think. I eat hummus, and I say 'Can I get' and 'I concur' sometimes.

BartonHollow You May be relieved to hear that the 'baker's boy' incident was a severe anomaly. Thread deleted, poster banned. No-one really talks like that.

I could probably be described as a 'creative professional' - everything in my world sounds pretentious ...

White Range Rovers are so common because so few of them are actually bought, they're mostly lease hired

The words 'journey ' and 'rollercoaster' to describe something they've never done or experienced before. Get over yourself.

Peacocks for sale here.

www.peacocksuk.com/peafowl-for-sale-at-peacocks-uk/

Personalised number plates
Miniature portions of food in restaurants
Anything bespoke
Range Rovers
Poncey wine bars (Just go the pub)
The man bun
Numbers instead of prices on a menu (gives me the rage for some reason)
Jus (isn't it just sauce/gravy?)
I could list things all day, maybe I just hate everything?
Might need to add peacocks to the list.

The word 'curated' outside of a formal museum scenario. Completely pretentious. As is -

• overpriced 'tasting menus'
• goji berries / chai seeds / quinoa - or in fact any unsubstantiated 'superfood'. Doesn't everyone know that your bog standard red lentil has more protein that hideously overpriced alternatives. Pop a supplement if needed, eat locally, seasonally grown fruit and veg and put your money back in your wallet.
• range rovers outside an off-road estate - it's a middle class badge pure and simple.
• people who only drink champagne and turn their noses up at Prosecco or Cava

Oh god yes - previous poster reminded me - personalised number plates!! Why?!! Seriously why?!

I could keep going - will be back on posting soon.

@JuniLoolaPalooza I totally agree - parents recoiling at the thought of giving their children tiny amounts of chocolate as a treat - it's chocolate not crack cocaine.

Someone talking about their children's toys being carefully curated (ie wooden and of high educational value). It's not a fucking museum exhibit. Who cares if they've got some plastic toys?

@BigStripeyBastard 😂😂😂. That made me laugh out loud. Made my day and it's only 7.30!

Yy to most of the above. I'd also add my Ex-DH.

Off topic but 'Poundland Wyatt Earp' and 'twatty arse foliage' are both now high on my list for my next name change. So thanks for that.

Fucking gin. Gin everywhere.

It was Prosecco a couple of years ago and people buy in or this shite.

Anyone who puts #feelingblessed #neverletthemdullyoursparkle #anyfuckingthing on social media. In particular a picture of their kids with a #myworld #theykeepmesane when I've just seen her yelling at the pair of them on the way home from school.

Bigstripeybastard that's the funniest rant I've ever read on MN. Snorted my coffee all over the dog. One jumped out a doorway on the high street at my friend, blocked her path, she shat herself.. they're big up close!

Ordinary houses with doric columns.
Do you live in the Parthenon? No, you live in a dull suburb. Get rid of your wanky columns, your house will actually look nicer for it.

Moaning about the cold pretentiously. There are women in my office who are sitting swaddled in scarves, wraps and coats indoors, delicately shivering as they are so cold. This is to point out how fragile And sensitive they are. I work in a hospital and it’s always fucking boiling indoors. Menopausal big fat sweaty me is just pathetically grateful it’s cooled down enough for me to put my cardi back on. If said delicate flowers actually moved and did some work they may warm up a bit.

All the cocks who’ve sold their London flat for a bazillion pounds and bought a large house in our market town who now parade around in red trousers and tweed - wankers

how the fuck can hummus possibly be said to be pretentious

"Ayup Priscilla-Sloane-Morditta, how's thee doin?"
"I've just come to the acquire my luncheon from the refrigerator"
"Oo are.. what ye got today me duck?"
"Well today I'm having home made hummus... Freshly made today using organic chickpeas gathered from the side of Walla Walla mountain in new guinea, tahini produced by isreali peasants using their own saliva to moisten it, a few freshly foraged mushrooms from the forests of Dean, a slosh of iced water from the Arctic circle and of course a little garlic curated from the artisnal garlic growers in the Italian foothills. I'll be eating it with organic carrots grown for me personally by master carrotter Alfred-Thoms-Herman-Johns... and what are you having Derek?"
"A cheese sarnie and a bag of Aldi cheese and onion crisps lass..."

Pretentiousness has nothing to do with cost, it's the way people elevate the status of a thing and try to make it sound better or more important. So some dick head having Hummus and carrot.sticks and looking down their nose at someone with a sarnie, that's pretentious.

@BigStripeyBastard, just spent a good 5 mins looking for your peacock post. I was not disappointed. 😂😂😂

PinkOboe Hopefully the red trouser brigade will be first against the wall when the revolution comes!

Agas in houses less than about 250 years old. Yes, I can see if you live in a draughty farmhouse with massive stone walls that take a year to heat up, and the occassional need to stick a newborn lamb into the low oven to revive, then it might be useful to have a giant tank of an always-on range stove squatting in the kitchen to act as a massive radiator. Everyone else is just showing off. It's far too big for your kitchen and you never use all the ovens except at Christmas, it's just a way to stealth boast that you can afford to constantly waste fuel. Yes, it may make ' the best toast in the world' but if you're honestly telling me you've spent £5k+ just to have toast, then you're hard of thinking tbqh.

On a similar theme, pod coffee machines: for people who are more about gadgets than coffee. You can make a better expresso with a £20 moka pot and generate far much waste. If you want a fancier coffee then do what the Italians do and go to a coffee shop which has forked out for professional grade equipment. It's an over-engineered solution for average quality coffee.

Posting about your gym workout / run in an " ooops,just ran 10 miles / did 2 spinning classes back to back " way.
Especially when followed by #livingyourbestlife

Or jumping in the air selfies crossing finish lines in races . Pretentious fuckers .

Loving the wanky peacock!

I run. I never ever post about my runs on fb or anywhere else. Who do these people think cares about their bloody run? What do they want...a chocolate medal? A round of applause?

Unless you have taken part in an event to speak of, there is no need to tell the world at large that you went for a run. No one cares how far you ran or where. There is no need to post a screenshot of your route as proof...NO ONE CARES.

When it really makes the colour pop

bang on Trend I don’t want to be on trend, I just want to look nice.

Yes to sourced! Everything is fucking sourced now.
My dh loves quinoa, I hide it in the trolley so I don’t look a twat.