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Would you give an 18 year old access to 50 grand + via child isa?

139 replies

Willbeatjanuaryblues · 05/01/2019 23:13

Just wondering.
There maybe chance gp are willing to put full amount in which would be 50 grand plus for eldest child. They said they are happy with the the child getting access at 18.

I'm not sure it's a great idea. I have another thread about uni fees etc which this money could go on but tonight with dh... I was discussing the power aspect.

Eg dd wants to go to out, normal 18 year old may not have funds but we say stay in tonight, she says... F you I'm paying for taxi I have the means....

OP posts:
Willbeatjanuaryblues · 05/01/2019 23:59

50 is Conservative estimate.

OP posts:
Willbeatjanuaryblues · 06/01/2019 00:01

But the flip side surf is that not having a penny and having quite substantial savings also weigh on someone.

That's what I mean about feeling free.. Having some for car.. But not enough to

To bugger off and never come back!

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SurfClub · 06/01/2019 00:02

Willbeat

But surf
Why is your dad giving so much money to gc but not you then?

It's all about control. Always!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

ChablisLover · 06/01/2019 00:03

Nope -
I have sons money from
Gp's in an account that only I am trustee
Off - he can't get it when he's 18

He can have the child
Trust fund - should be about £400
When he's 18 but the big money I stay in charge of

Willbeatjanuaryblues · 06/01/2019 00:07

Are you yiu happy with your that surf! Do you get on with your dh is treated awfully by his parents.

We have gone v low contact and things are much better.

I don't trust them.

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SurfClub · 06/01/2019 00:10

Also DS' choice to have his money in ISAs not available to spend which I applaud, he wants to buy a house one day and I've spent time showing him how much deposit is required nowadays etc. Or he might get his degree and then bugger off and never come back with his left over money!

The money will always be a love/hate relationship when there is so much given but on balance it's not the worst thing in the world to be troubled by. Also I was always very stubborn about making my own way in the world, from a very young age. I'm a stroppy left winger but can't spoil it for my children by refusing it for them. If they want to give it all to charity then that's their choice.

SurfClub · 06/01/2019 00:13

To clarify this is my parents money and I'm divorced, there isn't a lot of money from ex-h's family but a lot of love which is fantastic. I am normal contact with my family but aware of the control from my dad. He's a lovely man but probably damaged from his childhood, I'm just trying to not pay that forward if that makes sense.

shiningstar2 · 06/01/2019 00:25

We have an only child and 2 grandchildren. So far our wills state that our dc will receive 60% of the value of our house when we die and the gc will receive 20% each. This would be approx £35K for each gc. However our will stipulates that they can't access the money before age 25 ...the oldest we could go for without everything getting complicated. I'm hoping they are sensible by then as would make a useful house deposit. No way would they get it at 18. Far too immature. In fact we have recently been thinking of reducing their share to 10% each with rest going to dc as not totally confident they would use the money wisely even at aged 25. Still just kids at moment so no real way of guessing how sensible they will turn out to be with money.

ShanghaiDiva · 06/01/2019 00:42

As we live overseas ds received cash instead of gifts for birthday and Xmas and had about 22k when he was 18. He has full access to the money and researched where to invest it. I had no qualms about him having access at 18 as he knows how to budget and his personality is such that he would never blow it all on drinking or a holiday.
So short answer - access depends on child's personality.

AvocadosBeforeMortgages · 06/01/2019 00:45

No - the stakes are too high. I wouldn't have frittered it away even at 18, but I know many who would. I would want it put away in a fashion that allows some to be taken out for pre-defined purposes with agreement eg topping up student loans, house deposit, gap year, job loss etc, but not unfettered access at 18.

ErrolTheDragon · 06/01/2019 01:11

It depends on the individual. Our DD was left a bit by her GPS, she's happy to leave it invested with a view to house deposit,or whatever after she graduates. We knew she is level headed and not liable to fritter it away. DH has also warned her off scams and sob story dangers.

Yulebealrite · 06/01/2019 01:17

If you can persuade them to put it in a trust or something so that the kids don't access it until they are 25 or so, then I'd do that. If not you just have to hope your kids will be sensible with the money.

LovingLola · 06/01/2019 01:24

My children have a similar amount. One 18, one a bit older. No issues with it.

Willbeatjanuaryblues · 06/01/2019 09:01

At the moment at 11 dd is is level headed. She also goes for delayed gratification.

But its the impedance that sum given you.

I'm just wondering as it will be split between cash and stocks isa. Whether she's told about cash when 18 but we just won't tell her about stocks but then we have no control over the the grand parents..

We mentioned at 18 they could draw it and spend it on anything, fil said something like ' them they'd loosely that tax wrapper' something like that.

I'm not sure if I had wanted to buy something at 18 I would have been bothered about tax wrappers.

Fil has spoken as though its the only tax efficient way they can save for them.

It's the tax aspect he's obsessed with rather than the much bigger and broader issues.

I also don't want my dc to feel beholden to be these people.

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TeenTimesTwo · 06/01/2019 09:25

No way.

At 15 DD1 was quite sensible. Then she went to college, hooked up with a boyfriend and her whole focus changed.

Giving her 50k at 18 would have meant moving out, getting pregnant/married and neither of them focussing on getting proper jobs.

It's too big a risk.

BigGreenOlives · 06/01/2019 09:32

My neighbour’s daughter dropped out of work with a drink & drug problem & spent 8 weeks in rehab. She’s now early 30s and still doesn’t have a ‘proper’ job, she’s made all sorts of poor choices over the years.

Grahamiscrackers · 06/01/2019 09:34

Definitely no. Why can’t the Grandparents do exactly as they plan to but just up the age to 25yrs? A friend of ours was left money when he was 18yrs by grandparents - about £20k. Frittered it away over the course of a year (spent on repeated international flights - he’d fallen for someone in another country - he broke up with them shortly after the money ran out Hmm, clothes etc). Just such a waste.

ErrolTheDragon · 06/01/2019 09:38

Why can’t the Grandparents do exactly as they plan to but just up the age to 25yrs?

It's not possible to do that for many types of investment.

ihearttc · 06/01/2019 09:40

DS1 who is now 13 has got 100k in a bank account for him when he turns 18 but only us will have access to it. Its money that we and his grandparents have saved for him to do something very specific with (He wants to be a pilot and the training programme is around £88,000). If he choses to not do that (which I very much doubt as it's all he thinks about) then some of it will be used for University fees, car and if there is any left a house deposit. He knows its for him but we control it. There is no way Id give an 18 year old free reign of that sort of money.

sansou · 06/01/2019 10:21

My DC are very aware since they were much younger that we have been saving for them regularly since they were born, primarily for university. I have no issues with them having access at 18 yrs, having impressed on them over the years that the pot is hopefully large enough for a first degree otherwise a house deposit. £100 pcm since birth plus modest Christmas & birthday money gifts over the years in a CTF transferred to a jisa, invested in the stock market means that their pots are already exceeding our targets. A few friends I knew who received an inheritance young, used them to buy a house (back in the days you could buy a terraced house for £30k). Not all 18 yr olds spend £50k on drugs and partying!

IceRebel · 06/01/2019 10:29

I wouldn't want the responsibility of that much money at such a young age. But if it's being saved on their behalf all I think you can do is drill into them how lucky they are, and encourage them think before they spend.

I'm also very surprised by the number of people who say it's for uni fees. I thought the most recent advice was it was a waste of money to pay for university upfront, and the student 'loans' were the more sensible route.

Willbeatjanuaryblues · 06/01/2019 10:32

I hadn't even thought of boy friends etc! Shock

Erroll whilst isa maybes the most tax efficient way of saving, its not the only way.

They could just put money into a normal bank account and save that way.

No it may not grow as much but.. It's still putting money away. They could use their own isa.

It's a circuitous route out of our hands which is a reason I don't like the it.

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Willbeatjanuaryblues · 06/01/2019 10:35

Sansou that's amazing!
Aretha you able to pm me any vague details about the stocks you used or funds. We are about to split the the cash isa into a stocks one. Don't worry if you don't want too though Smile

I want my children to be free of burden at 18 and have some fun.

I don't neccsarily want them to be ultra sensible. Which is why I think access to a little bit of money is better than a huge chunk.

I think 30 to 35 is perfect age for lump sums.

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Heyha · 06/01/2019 10:37

Nope. At that age I'd have worked well with "we have money put aside for big expenses for you, please ask if you need it" so for eg had my driving lessons and car paid for directly from it. Then the money I earned at my student job would have been mine to piss away if I chose to rather than being saved or spent on sensible things. So would still have got to blow some cash on being young and silly but in no way wasting a life-changing amount of money.

yogafailure · 06/01/2019 10:37

Interesting as usually on this site you get the "they're an adult at 18" line trotted out. I've an 18 and 20 year old in this household and I wouldn't call either an adult yet. No way would I be happy with either of them having access to £50k right now.