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If you wrote the Christmas cards, did you put your DH/DP's name first?

79 replies

HelenUrth · 30/12/2018 00:29

Looking through the cards we received this year, I know most of them were written by the wife/female partner, yet in most cases they've put the husband/partner's name first.

I've always written the majority of cards in our house, and put my name first having agreed with DH that he puts his name first if he writes the card.

What do you do, and why?

OP posts:
GinIsIn · 30/12/2018 04:45

I’ve just realised I do it alphabetically. This does mean DH first, but it also puts the dog in front of DS, so it’s not all men first! Grin

5SleepingLions · 30/12/2018 05:10

It depends who the card is for if it's my partners friend/family I put his name first.
If it's for my friends/family it's mine

EffOrf · 30/12/2018 05:12

My name first if I write them unless it is to his family then his name first. Usually though he writes the ones to his family so I don't know what he writes.

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mortifiedmama · 30/12/2018 05:12

Cards I write, my name first, cards DH writes, his name first. No reason behind it other than habit.

JeezYouLoon · 30/12/2018 06:35

I write ours in age order so DH first, my Mum did this so I guess I just did the same. Never questioned it to be honest.

tiredmummy1991 · 30/12/2018 06:40

I tend to write dh's name first for his family and mine with mine.

OlennasWimple · 30/12/2018 06:40

I used to default to DH's name first, but more recently I have put my name first if I'm writing it (or completing the online gift message)

Small steps towards equality, folks Smile

Juanbablo · 30/12/2018 06:55

I usually write my name first. I wrote the cards so my name comes first!

MariaWaria · 30/12/2018 07:08

My name first.

I recall ex SL saying when we got married that I'd have to start putting his name first. Yeah, right Hmm

MagentaRocks · 30/12/2018 07:23

I put male name first if it is them known best - ie bill and sil. If it is my side I write my name then dh name. If it is his family dh name then my name. I wouldn’t just put the male name first although I have just realised that all of the family cards will have male name first using this method. With neighbours cards I think of them differently, some are her him and others him her.

hazeyjane · 30/12/2018 07:27

My name first on the ones I write
My name first on the ones dh writes!

nuttyknitter · 30/12/2018 07:34

I was tempted to create a thread on this exact topic. I can't understand why anyone signing a card would put their OH's name first - it's bizarre.

scrivette · 30/12/2018 07:35

My Grandmother taught me to put my name second.

I also think it's part of the conversation 'rules' in that speaker should go second. 'Mr Scrivette and I...'

NoParticularPattern · 30/12/2018 07:36

I change it depending on who the card is to. If it’s DHs family or friends then his name goes first, my family and friends get my name first. I sort of match it up with how we know them- ie is it through me or DH.

Notacluethisxmas · 30/12/2018 07:40

I do it alphabetically. So exh came first. But if I was writing mum or dad's card from me and my brother I used to put me first. And when I have been in relationships whose name is alphabetically after mine, I put mine first. Current Dps name is behind mine.

My brother does the same. This thread has made me wonder where me and dbro get it from.

MeltingWax · 30/12/2018 07:41

I write my name first then DP, DD, DS, Cat.

And it certainly wouldn't have occurred to me to check this with him first Confused.

Fantastiqueangel · 30/12/2018 07:41

Me first every time. Also always put the female receiver first inside as well. Usually put Mrs and Mr on the envelope too.

MeetOnTheSIedge · 30/12/2018 07:58

My name first. I tend to address couples by the one with the closest link first, so eg Jane and Peter for an aunt and uncle where Jane is the blood relative.

Fairylea · 30/12/2018 08:00

My name first but I don’t notice at all whatever other people do!

happypotamus · 30/12/2018 08:02

The majority of them were to my extended family or my friends so I put my name first. He doesn't have much extended family and didn't want to send cards to many friends. Ones to his family I put his name first or made him write them (I thought it would be weird for me to write 'To Mum and Dad' in his parents' card).

Awrite · 30/12/2018 08:05

Christ, I'm 43 and even when I was a teenager I'd address cards to female first.

So, thank you cards to Mrs M & Mr K Surname. Where male was the blood relative. Reason being - I knew she had picked and sent the gift.

Tradition? Tradition makes you act like an unthinking child?

mogtheexcellent · 30/12/2018 08:08

Me first. Address it to female first. Because its mostly the females who are my friends. Would be a bit weird addressing a card to a friend of 20 years husband of 2 years first iygwim.

Husband does his own bloody cards. No idea what order he uses.

jessstan2 · 30/12/2018 08:09

No, always put my name first and husband's second.

MrsJonesAndMe · 30/12/2018 08:12

I wrote mine to read: MrsJ, MrJ, DD and DS

Presumably the few DH wrote would have read MrJ, MrsJ, DD & DS

Samcro · 30/12/2018 08:21

I write them and I put my name first on the ones for my people and his for his people.

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