DS4’s early waking is destroying us all.

[ZaraZebra]

DS is 4.5 and has never been a brilliant sleeper. His ‘normal’ wake up time seems to be 4.45am, but when the clocks go back in October he starts waking at 3.45am - and his body clock doesn’t ever reset. We had a whole winter of this last year.

He wakes regularly at 3.45am for the day, and will not be persuaded to go back to sleep. He shares a room wth his older brother and will often wake him. Older DS has mild SEN, and is particularly affected by sleep deprivation, so this is particularly upsetting.

So if we leave him in his room he wakes his poor brother.
If we whisk DS out of there, he wakes the baby. Who then normally wakes DS1.
If we reluctantly take him into the living room, he wakes our neighbour.

He appears v awake, not tired. Just ready for the day - at 4am. But he screams bloody murder if we leave him.

I’ve asked the HV for help in the past. She suggested an earlier bedtime, so he now goes to bed between 6-6.30pm, which has helped in that we can now get to bed earlier ourselves. But nothing has changed his early wake up.

We have also tried: no screens after 4pm; no sugar; milky porridge for supper; enforced hour in the garden.

We’ve mentioned it to Drs in the past who have laughed. But it’s not funny, particularly as it affects DS1. People have often laughed over the years that he would sleep more once he went to school, but he hasn’t.

Sorry this is so long, but I’m desperate. Any advice? Is there anything medically that can be done?
Thanks

Try these people www.thechildrenssleepcharity.org.uk/

Also there was a really interesting programme about sleep on Tv. It said if you woke earlyyou needed to be exposed to uv light in either the morning or evening. I can’t remember which bit I’m sure you could google it

Mine did this. I tried a combination of gro clock, slightly later bedtime (only about half an hour), and doing the dream wee at about 10:30 when we went to bed. They really only woke up enough during this to walk to the loo while being led by the hand, hardly even opened their eyes, but it did seem to reset them for a further 9 or 10 hours!

I wouldn't say he needs to go back to sleep because if he can't, he can't. However, at 4.5, I'd say he's old enough to understand that its too early for other people therefore he needs to stay in bed and rest. I'd buy him a portables CD player with headphones and maybe some audio books or get him a little reading light and let him read in bed....but the crux of it is, he must stay in bed.

Haven't read the full thread Op but I can recommend the sleeplady/ Linda russell. Comes highly recommended. She has personally helped me with baby/toddler stage but she does successfully work for older children too.

I would definitely try waking him at 10pm/ before you go to bed to try and reset the sleep cycle.

Have you looked at the wake to sleep method? A lot of it relates to younger babies and toddlers but I do know people who have used it successfully with older children

My ds was 5 in December. I used to put him to bed at 7 and he was up by 5am, or 4am depending on the time of year.

He is currently staying in bed until 10am, because he doesn't go to sleep until about 12ish. Because we were on holiday for a week before they broke up for Christmas and nights and mornings have gradually got later.

When he is at school he goes up at 7.30pm, tv for an hour in bed (Its a compromise between that or being downstairs with us, watching tv) then I turn it off and expect him to be quiet and in bed. He generally falls asleep by 9pm and is up by 7am.

I think some dcs just need less sleep. 10 hours is plenty for him even with full time school, 2 miles a day walking for the school run, outside time and a healthy diet.

I would say it takes a few weeks for a later bedtime/later wake time to kick in. On holiday he was up at 7am as usual despite much later nights. It took until this week fir the later nights to become later getting ups. And after nyd I will start waking him up earlier ready for school to start again.