Why are so many children suffering from anxiety?

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I'm watching an episode of 'School' where the Head is saying the number of children with anxiety is increasing every year, seems to be backed up by research too.

I don't have children yet but I'm aware of how debilitating anxiety can be and so guess I am wondering out loud why so many more children have anxiety these days?

What part of this is in the control of parents? What can we do to try to build more resilience in children?

Do any of those with DC who have anxiety have thoughts about what has caused it?

Lack of social interaction due to social media so they can’t cope with basic things like being called names
Eh?

Also they have everything done for them nowadays so again don’t gain confidence from learning to do things for themselves (even simple things like cooking a basic meal or taking the bus).
Oh... that old chestnut

Lack of social interaction due to social media so they can’t cope with basic things like being called names
what about teaching people kindness and not name calling from childhood

Nobody likes being called names, what is it ok for a child but not an adult.

This is what is wrong with society, the mentality of "suck it up, victim blaming"
So if a child is called a name they must endure it? I was called names? I never called anyone names. I still don't, why was my job to adapt to the nasty behaviour and not the other way around.

I rather be anxious and a good person that a name calling one

Parents clearing obstacles before kids have even encountered them. No resilience, being looked after for too long instead of finding their own feet.

@schopenhauer do you actually have children?

Because you’d be hard pushed to find a child that was not aware of/had experience of real life bullying/name calling. And if they are in secondary school they would certainly have learned how to cook a meal there, and many would have already been taught to do that at home. And in our area kids either walk, get a bus, or get a train to school from age 11, and at our local primary school it’s normal for year 5 kids to walk to and from school without parents. Our school has no lollipop person and it is impossible to get there without crossing roads. I doubt my area in England is that unusual...

I have 4 teenagers, 3 are confident, resilient, self assured and 1 suffers from severe anxiety.

They have been brought up the same way, get plenty of sleep, eat very well, sufficient exercise, etc. I was a SAHM so I could give all the dc as much of my time as possible, we were a very child focused household, but I encouraged all of them to be independent in an age appropriate manner. When they were younger there was no social media, esp for the older ones (20 and 18). I didn't mollycoddle or over protect them but neither did I expose them to the grim realities of life. In saying this I'm just trying to respond to some of the posts above.

IMO there is a huge genetic component, in the same way some of our dc might be more likely to develop type 1 diabetes. It's not because they ate too many sweets, it's genetics. For my dc, there was a trigger (too much academic pressure at school) but that wasn't the cause. I think we as adults can focus too much on finding the cause in the hope that we can 'fix' the 'problem' when really we just need to accept that this is the way that the child's mind works and find a way to deal with it. CBT can help, mindfulness and counselling can help, it depends on the person, but I have found what helps most is just accepting that this is how you are and learning strategies to help you lead a happy, fulfilling life. I think there can be an attitude that someone is 'broken' and needs to be 'fixed' when they have a mental health issue which IME isn't particularly helpful.

Several factors but I remain convinced the major one is parents trying to create perfect happiness and protect children from unpleasantness at all costs. Little ones never learning to deal with sadness or disappointment. Parents flying in to sort out playground squabbling or a child being told off by teacher. Parents complaining about merit certificate or star awards. School play roles etc.
Children not having to manage reasonable expectations being put on them to sleep, to eat most foods, to dress themselves and use a lavatory.
Over medicalisation of some issues. Acceptance of poor behaviour as inevitable because of SEN. Sending children to GP instead of telling them life is sometimes sad and worrying. What’s a GP meant to do with normal teenage angst?

Over exposure to screens and not enough healthy activities.
Avoiding pressure instead of teaching children to cope. Allowing children to opt out when academic achievement is the best way to overcome low self esteem, anxiety and to avoid a lifetime of problems.

Allowing children to opt out when academic achievement is the best way to overcome low self esteem, anxiety and to avoid a lifetime of problems.
I could reply to your entire post but I will just stick to this bit at the end.
I got straight As until college.
I was aways number 1 in class.
I speak 3 languages fluently and have worked for some of the most prestigious organisations in my field.
I have low esteem, insecurities and suffer from terrible anxiety.

All the reasons you listed I could argue.

Children are not anxious because of all those. A lot of it is genetic and then it could actually be the opposite to what you are suggesting.

It is dangerous that people spread this misconceptions.

Well, as a parent of a child diagnosed with anxiety at 10, I can tell you that
1, he has never been on social media
2, he has always been allowed to take risks
3, he is not micromanaged
4, he isn't always on technology
5, he has a healthy diet
6, I have not wrapped him up in cotton wool
7, he has spent plenty of time outside
8, I haven't made him anxious.

But you all carry on with blaming the parents eh?

He also has ASD but his anxiety is the most debilitating thing he has.

*@SnuggyBuggy *
I was wondering about a comment on another thread about children being allowed to make choices about things like family holidays at a young age.

Ime (I work in this field) what you have said rings very true in quite a few children I've seen. Children are given lots of choices these days, not just simple logical ones like, do you want fish fingers or sausages for tea, but do you want to go to school or what would you like to happen about x problem, do you want medication for this, no boundaries around social media etc. Because if this some children feel uncontained by the adults around them, so they feel they are in control of things they don't have the skills and experience to be in control of which can cause them anxiety.

@wheresmyhairytoe
Thank you for that. I am an anxious adult that also experienced all those points as a child.
There was no social media, I was encouraged to be independent, I was most definitely not sheltered or over protected, I had a healthy diet with lots of exercise outdoors.

We need to STOP using blame to explain anxiety.
Not the person's fault for not "being tough", not the parents for X,Y and Z

Can't we focus on how to be more compassionate and understanding instead of pretending we all have a psychology degree and blaming and pointing fingers?

This thread reminds me of threads about 10 years ago about how autism and adhd diagnosis were just parents excusing bad behaviour

Our kids are unhappy and stressed and anxious . Especially the girls

Also the poster who said ‘every other person on here has anxiety so it’s learned behaviour or environment.’

I know other people who say stuff like that. They’re arseholes

Oh! And for all of those parenting experts that have children in their 20s, 30s, 40s and think that children these days are given too many choices, over protected, allowed social media and TV, eat badly..

Let me remind you that the highest rate of people taking medication, searching therapy and help and taking their lives is higher than ever and it is mostly people in that age bracket.

So before you get on your high horse of "children these days/ parents these days" you need to understand that it is our generation, the ones that were children 30/40 years ago, the ones that have a ridiculous amount of mental health problems.

So it is not parenting today, it has always been there, or at least in the most recent centuries. Maybe always there? But people called it other names.

Competitive parenting, SATS, busy all the time as in doing many extra curricular activities, not seeing a lot of their parent(s).. just some reasons I can think of

If you work with children and actually listen to them as well as talking, you know these things. It's sad.

Jesus Fucking Christ

The blame the parents stuff is a big thing on here tonight.

In terms of the original question though, I think it isn't unreasonable of people to make suggestions such as over use of social media.

They aren't saying it is the only reason for anxiety, but it could well be that there are environmental factors that are tipping some children already pre-disposed for whatever reason, over the edge.

So group 1 - children who for whatever reason have high level anxiety just from 'normal' life

Group 2 - children who have a bit less anxiety in normal life (maybe would be called a natural worrier or something), but throw schoolwork, tech use etc into the mix and it's too much and triggers the high level anxiety that can get diagnosed.

(A bit like schizophrenia can be triggered by cannabis use - the predisposition was there but it needed to be kick started?)

We don't look for blame if a child has a physical illness so why are you (mostly) all blaming parents for mental health problems.
I have 2 children, both brought up exactly the same, 1 has extreme anxiety and struggles to leave the house some days, can't speak to anyone he doesn't know and fears anything new, 1 is the most chilled out person you could ever meet who throws herself into everything and will gladly try new experiences and talk to anyone.
Nothing I have done has caused this. He has a mental health problem and that is nobody's fault. Just like his short sightedness isn't anyone's fault.

Increased pressure on teachers being passed onto pupils. I actually think that behavioural expectations in schools have become much more strict so that kids can no longer make mistakes. We had rules when I was at school but you wouldn’t be disciplined for things like forgetting stationary, losing items of clothing, staring into space etc. Schools are quite an anxiety producing environment these days - even for kids who are generally well behaved.
Add that to the fact that children spend so little time outside and miss out on the mental health benefits of exercising and spending time outdoors. Massive amounts of screen time, poorer diets as there is less often a parent at home who has the time or inclination to prepare healthy food from scratch.
Kids also have less time to play freely or just relax as they’re often shipped from school to childcare to clubs to bed. Later nights because there’s so much to fit in - homework, clubs etc. Being driven everywhere rather than walking again missing out on the physical/mental health benefits of exercise. I think modern childhood is just the perfect environment for anxiety unfortunately.

planespotting. You might well be the anecdotal exception. Research suggests that supporting academic achievement, especially for those who externalise emotional problems but others with early exhibition of mental health problems can have a transformational impact on adult life success. That doesn’t mean bright children can’t become adults with mental health problems but significant and enduring mental ill health is associated more closely with poverty, low socioeconomic culture and poor academic achievement.

I know someone who works in a hospital and has noticed lots of teenagers on antidepressants etc. He said that he doesn’t understand why. Children have nothing to worry about. They have a roof over their heads. They don’t really know what stress is! Wait till you’re an adult and you’re struggling to put food on the table and you can’t provide for your kids

My son is on antidepressants because his anxiety was so bad he couldn't leave the house. His anxiety stems from trying to live in a neurotypical world as a person with ASD. That probably gives him more to worry about than an average adult. He has never been on social media despite being 15 because it frightens him. Perhaps your friend needs to consider that all teens on antidepressants will have been prescribed them by a doctor, who presumably knows a bit more about it than he does.

I had anxiety as a child but it was never recognised or recorded. I think we are better at catching it and arranging help these days. I can remember lots of people in my school who, looking back, had mental health issues but were viewed as naughty or a bit odd.

I do think there is more pressure on kids these days to do well in exams. BBC were considered decent A Level grades when I was at school but when the exam results come in you see people on here posting about how disappointed they are or how your child will never get to uni without any As.

@wheresmyhairytoe

What you've said rings very true and children with ASC do often unfortunately have high levels of anxiety- especially those that are more high functioning (and a lot higher than general public). As I am sure you know, the strategies (and interventions and treatment) to support these children are often very different from NT children.

He has a mental health problem and that is nobody's fault. Just like his short sightedness isn't anyone's fault. 💙💙💙

I am a parent and a teacher.

When I see 16 year olds get their GCSE results and have achieved over target - yet proclaim they are a failure as they only got a grade 3 (old D)

When I teach year 7s who know that they were not on target at primary school so don't think it's worth working.

When I see a girl making herself sick because she doesn't look like the latest airbrushes model.

When I see a teenage boy punching the wall because he cannot cope with the shit home he has.

There are so many factors that make a child anxious. My son suffers from depression and anxiety. Self harm and suicidal thoughts. This stems from his dad leaving and his attitude before he left (and one that continues today).

I have depression but am very good at hiding it. As a fat and (undiagnosed) dyspraxic who has psoriasis all over her face I was physically and mentally bullied....

The fact is it is real and we don't do enough to help

Relentless pressure and expectations at school, starting with fuckng SATs in Year 2.
Social media. Can be good, can be bad, but definitely raises anxiety re expectation, perfect life, etc.
The times we live in. Uncertainty re Brexit, uni fees, how to afford a house, what to do if you fail exams, being left behind, what career to choose...