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Original poster

Excluded for uploading fight video

98 replies

TickleMyPickle · 07/12/2018 17:31

My daughter ( year 7 ) has been excluded from school for 3 days for uploading a fight between 2 boys that happened outside of school grounds but in school uniform.
I am shocked by this punishment if I’m honest, does it seem reasonable to you?

OP posts:
bertielab · 07/12/2018 18:03

Bloody hell only 3 days. So she filmed non consenting children under 16? She didn’t get help? She then shared it on public media? If my child was fighting I would expect an exclusion. Videoing it for ‘fun’ totally sick - and I’d expect a longer exclusion / posting on social media against GDPR for the ‘enjoyment of others’ or whatever sad reason she did it I’d have expected a permanent exclusion. She needs counselling and a huge kick up the arse. Where is her kindness? Compassion? Common sense ? And why the hell is she on social media at 11? One of mine is 12 - they have no social media and wouldn’t dream of taking pictures of a fight! In fact Their younger DB wasn’t feeling well and they were all at the GP surgery and trying to keep ill child amused as they were v ill by taking pictures of each other. Youngest one was sitting on the floor at my feet and DC 2 said I can’t take your picture as I’ll get that lady’s boot in the picture and not just you and I can’t get someone else in the picture as that wouldn’t be fair. The lady said it was fine to take the picture so they did - but before they snap anyone they ask!!!

Workreturner · 07/12/2018 18:03

Totally agree with school

I would be truly disturbed and very anxious if my daughter did this.

Your focus is ALL wrong.

dippledorus · 07/12/2018 18:04

DD was third year. It carried on and she stuck out her GCSE's and is elsewhere for A level.

She had a broken eye socket and her nose and mouth was bleeding (thankfully not broken nose and no broken teeth) and her knees were all scraped. She was grabbed by the hair and had her face smashed into the pavement.

Hugs for youngmrgetthepartystarted. I hope he does amazing and middle finger to the little shits.

Greensleeves · 07/12/2018 18:04

And what is she doing on social media in Y7? She's too young.

Sunisshining5346 · 07/12/2018 18:06

Yes she should be punished! That video will stay on the internet forever.

I would be disgusted if my children done this.

MessyBun247 · 07/12/2018 18:08

She didn’t film it. She was sent it by someone and she in turn sent it to someone else.

dippledorus · 07/12/2018 18:09

She should NOT have forwarded it on. She should have shown a parent or a teacher and asked their advice. She should not have taken part in the sharing of a video of an assault FFS.

That will be on her school record for the rest of her days. Hardly a good start to year 7 is it. She would need to mend up.

Original poster
TickleMyPickle · 07/12/2018 18:10

Sorry for those who have had children filmed being hurt.
This was 2 , 11 year old boys who had “arranged” the fight, both participating equally. They were pulling each other’s bags and attempting to slap one another and not actually making contact.

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 07/12/2018 18:12

would’ve thought 3 days essentially “off school” is less of a punishment than isolation
Well that's down to you OP. What do you intend to do with her for those three days? Will she be home alone with all her tech available, having a merry old time or will you actually make this a punishment so she understands what she did wrong?

dippledorus · 07/12/2018 18:12

Doesn't matter. It is unacceptable either way - and honestly, if you think it's OK because two boys "arranged" the fight then you are as bad as she is. No wonder she saw fit to send it on.

SleepingStandingUp · 07/12/2018 18:13

Uploaded it to where OP?

Avrannakern · 07/12/2018 18:13

@GetTheStartyParted

In the UK, it is not your choice whether or not to press charges. That's an American term.
Here, once you call the police it is up to them to make arrests and send a report to the crown prosecution service or procurator fiscal. They then decide whether to proceed with charges or not.

They might ask your opinion, but even if you say no they can proceed with a prosecution if it is "in the public interest".

FTA28 · 07/12/2018 18:14

Totally appropriate. To upload it your daughter presumably recorded it or lent her phone to someone to record it. If one of the people fighting were to be charged with assault your daughter could be deemed to be encouraging it and prosecuted herself for aiding and abetting.

In those circumstances she can’t whinge about her relatively painless punishment

overnightangel · 07/12/2018 18:14

Alvsolutely reasonable, lenient if anything.
Why would she do that?????
Horrific

FTA28 · 07/12/2018 18:15

Or even both charged with affray....

ExcitedForChristmas18 · 07/12/2018 18:16

You are making excuses for your child's behaviour. What she done is illegal. She should be punished. It's up to you now as her parent, to make sure in those three days she knows that her actions in life have consequences.

Three days off sat chatting to friends on her phone..hmm you are asking for her to do stupid things again.

The next four weeks no phone, no meeting friends etc..she will think twice about being so stupid again!

Chocolatedeficitdisorder · 07/12/2018 18:16

My ASD Ds was a victim in a filmed assault when he was 12. I pressed charges and one boy was charged with a communications crime and spent time working with an offenders charity.

I would have had every person who uploaded it suspended for a week, they may not have thrown a punch, but it's tantamount to watching, cheering and inviting others to join in the fun of watching the bullying and humiliation of another child.

BreakYourselfAgainstMyStones · 07/12/2018 18:19

You seem to be downplaying the seriousness of what she has done op.

The police could potentially be involved in this too.

Hushnownobodycares · 07/12/2018 18:21

Schools crack down hard on Year 7 and rightly so. The reasoning will be she and the rest who thought it a great idea will hopefully think twice before doing anything like it again. Entirely proportionate.

dippledorus · 07/12/2018 18:22

If she was mine.

She would be off social media for the foreseeable.

She would only have a brick phone to text/phone if anything happened on the way home from school and that only if she traveled independently to school.

She would have limited and supervised internet access.

And she would not be out the door except to school.

And there would be a lot of cleaning and chores she would be doing and an awful lot of how disappointed I was in her and what a disgrace she was to have taken delight and sent that sort of thing on.

SnuggyBuggy · 07/12/2018 18:24

A prearranged fight may not be as bad morally as filming someone being victimised but I would still use this as a teaching moment.

dippledorus · 07/12/2018 18:26

A prearranged fight can still be bullying and is still not acceptable in any way shape or form to film and share.

OP, you need to reset your moral compass here.

Knittink · 07/12/2018 18:26

I don't understand, OP - you say you're shocked by the punishment, but then say that you think it's lenient compared with an in-school isolation. What are you shocked about then?

roisinagusniamh · 07/12/2018 18:27

So pleased to see how well the school have dealt with this .....gives me hope .

Sethis · 07/12/2018 18:28

Legitimate punishment.

One of the worst things about smartphones is people's fucking obsession with filming bad things happening instead of doing something to help.

"Oh, someone's getting mugged, better instagram it lolololol"

Super happy the school is delivering the message that this is not okay.

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