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Original poster

DD14 desperate to do MONTH long exchange to USA - would you allow?

101 replies

TheLuckyMrsPine · 02/12/2018 19:57

DD goes to a school (UK) that has just been bought by an International School chain. They offer month long exchanges with other schools in the partnership. DD is desperate to do an exchange to Louisiana, USA.

I am terrified but don’t want my anxieties to hold her back. She would be staying with a student in their home. She would have to do the flight alone. I have tried to talk her into going to France or Spain but she’s not interested.

Would you let your daughter go?

OP posts:
greendale17 · 02/12/2018 19:58

No

Etino · 02/12/2018 19:59

Yes. What are your fears?

Orlande · 02/12/2018 19:59

If I could comfortably afford it then yes - what an experience.

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BiscuitDrama · 02/12/2018 19:59

I think I’d be happier with US than France or Spain as the language barrier would make it harder to raise issues? What were your thoughts?

GreenandBlueButterfly · 02/12/2018 20:00

Yes. Definitely. Great opportunity

TwoGinScentedTears · 02/12/2018 20:02

Maybe.

It would depend on so many things-has she flown at all before? Are the flights direct? Is she mature? Will you have any contact with the host family prior to the trip? What planning does the school do with your dd? What part of Louisiana? Can you afford it?

If I could afford it, if my dc was mature enough and well travelled enough and I got to Skype the host family a few times and got a good itinerary and the likes I'd be tempted to say yes. Good opportunities are hard to turn down, and it may have a huge positive impact on your dd: it'd certainly broaden her horizons.

What are you worried about?

ResponsibleMushroomForager · 02/12/2018 20:06

I have a 14 year old DD and I would refuse. A month is too long at that age.

I wouldn't be keen on her going to the Deep South either.

ernjas · 02/12/2018 20:10

Not sure. A month is a long time at age 14 and she may not cope with it as well as she thinks she would while she's excited and caught up in the idea.
I'd find out all details and have a long conversation with her about her reasons and thoughts and the fact she'd be travelling on her own and then make a decision.

SurvivingCBeebies · 02/12/2018 20:11

Lots of people send children to boarding school every day... a month long exchange isn't long in the grand scheme of things and an amazing opportunity.. x

ShesABelter · 02/12/2018 20:12

Yes I absolutely would.

Original poster
TheLuckyMrsPine · 02/12/2018 20:12

I don’t know what my fears are really. Just the unknown.

She has flown a lot but never on her own. Has been on lots of foreign trips abroad with school, longest 2 weeks.

Only have to pay for flight and then we will host the student over here in return at a later date. They will go to each other’s schools as owned by same partnership. She would be going to just outside of Baton Rouge.

Flight is direct and she will be met at the airport. The school are very experienced at doing these within the group, but none of the students at DDs school have been to this particular one. She and we will get to email/Skype the family for a few months before the exchange.

A month just seems so long and it’s so far away. Europe I could get there within 4 hours. I don’t know what I think will happen, I’m obviously just a worrier!

I would never have done anything like this at her age, she is just such a go getter which I love. I don’t want her independence and adventurous nature to be stunted because of my anxieties.

OP posts:
starrynight19 · 02/12/2018 20:13

Wow yes my dd would love this what a fantastic opportunity.

Chewbecca · 02/12/2018 20:13

Yes, if she really wanted to. It would be a really memorable experience/opportunity.

RaisinforBeing · 02/12/2018 20:16

I spent a year in an American high school when I was 16/17. Undoubtedly one of the best experiences I had. I did a month in European country when I was 14, it was great too. These experiences are great at broadening horizons. I would just love my children to do something similar.

Aneira11 · 02/12/2018 20:26

I visited a friend in the US when I was 16 and spent 2 weeks attending her high school. An amazing opportunity. Such great memories!!

Maybe try to find out more about the host family etc.

Original poster
TheLuckyMrsPine · 02/12/2018 20:29

They will try and match her as best as possible and they use an online system for a term before departure with activities to get to know each other.

The host family are that of a current student at the exchange school and have to be fully screened etc. No other adults are allowed in the house and there are various rules etc.

OP posts:
FitzChivalryFarseer · 02/12/2018 20:39

Yes, absolutely. What a brilliant opportunity.

I hope you also get to reciprocate and have the student back to stay with you.

Original poster
TheLuckyMrsPine · 02/12/2018 20:40

Yes Fitz the host student will come here for a month later in the year too.

OP posts:
starzig · 02/12/2018 20:41

Yes please don't hold her back. This is a great opportunity.

mimibunz · 02/12/2018 20:42

Can she go anywhere other than the Deep South? It’s all about guns and Jesus. It will be a huge culture shock.

torthecatlady · 02/12/2018 20:44

I don't have a 14 year old, but what an amazing opportunity! Would it be the first time she's away from home?

Original poster
TheLuckyMrsPine · 02/12/2018 20:46

mimi she will be with the host family of a student at an international school which is part of the same group as her own school so i’m not overly concerned about there being a huge culture shock within the host family’s house.

If she were to do it I would want her to see the difference in culture, religion would be just as prevalent in a Spain I would imagine.

OP posts:
Original poster
TheLuckyMrsPine · 02/12/2018 20:47

No torthecatlady but she has only done 2 weeks maximum before.

OP posts:
Annandale · 02/12/2018 20:48

Yes, absolutely, although I agree with you that I would rather it was in a country where she'd be learning a different language, but yes anyway.

I sent my 14 year old off on a plane to Spain for a week last year. It was quite hard for him and I think he was brave to go, but yes I would do it for longer, he gained an enormous amount. Without the language barrier it should be easier. If she actually wants to do it, support her to do this amazing thing.

Unicornandbows · 02/12/2018 20:52

That would be amazing such a great opportunity!! Definitely would be happy for my future kid lol

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