You know you're tired when...

[lucysmam]

The cheese goes on the pile of pots to be washed up, and the grater goes on the cheese shelf in the fridge

When I cry because I didn't break a glass when I dropped it on the floor. Same night i also cried because my cheese sandwich tasted good.

I fell asleep in the shower.

Forgot to put a bra on and went to uni without it.

Left my socks on in the shower.

When I can't remember how to cook something. I have to step back and let DH cook when that happens because I'm likely to injure myself. I get pretty bad sometimes and it's better to let me stay away from heat.

...you go out to the shop, arrive home and find the front door shockingly open. Realising that you've been burgled, you bravely enter the house to face what has been taken, half expecting to have to confront intruders and a terrible mess. You are shaking and your mouth has gone dry. You are of course too tired to do the sensible thing, of calling a neighbour and the police before you go inside, alone. After all, you have been burgled before, you remember, and the burglars were still inside when you got home.

But all is in order. Nothing has been stolen. Everything is as you left it. Nobody is hiding under the bed or in the wardrobe.

It slowly, oh so slowly, dawns on you that you'd meant to unlock the car, put your bag in there, and go back to shut and lock the house door before driving off to the shop. But you didn't.

It is you who left the door open and unlocked. You feel relieved, but also a fool.

When you take a child's blended lunch (special school) to the fridge in the laundry room, and put said lunch straight into the washing machine. And it seems like the right place...

Opening the airing cupboard to find 6 pints of milk in there...

When you look for your reading glasses everywhere in the classroom and the 6 year old with severe learning difficulties, gently takes them out of your pocket and puts them on your face

My own kids are grown up but I think my job is killing me!!

I stood there unable to recall the word "dinosaur" whilst staring at one and eventually managed "dolphin"
I also had to describe "Storm Troopers" as "the bad white guys"

LOL!!!! Found all these hilarious as I feed my little one in the small hours

When you try to put your six week old in the booster seat instead of your toddler, and only realise what you're doing when she obviously can't sit straight for you to fasten the straps. This was in the middle of a busy bistro. Luckily it's a very child friendly place!

Use self service checkout, pay for your goods and then forget to bring them with you. I didn't realise until I got home.

When you do the school run with your jumper inside out and back to front.

Can beat that. I taught a whole morning, took class on the bus to swimming pool watched them during a basketball session, then sat at the side of the pool, got everyone out, changed (endless lost socks, dropped in a puddle clothes and on this occasion a wouldnt-unlock-locker) then looked down and realised my top was both inside out and backwards and not a soul thought it was a good idea to tell me

Called the fridge the "cold cupboard"

A colleague brought me coffee. I'd made it, but walked away and left it in the staff room.

I hunted all over the staff room ranting about my bowl that was missing. Pulling out others.. "it's this colour, but this shape", if someone's binned it..... who would move it? Then the microwave beeped. Yep....Slowly dawned on me. Inside was my soup, in the bowl I was looking for, exactly where I'd put it about 2mins before.

...you go downstairs and realise that you've only put one slipper on.

You only realise this because one foot is warm and the other is icy cold. You think you've got a terrible illness, but it's just that you're standing on the stone floor without one slipper.

.... you get to your car and wonder why the lights aren't flashing after repeatedly pressing the button on your key fob to unlock the door. until you realise it's not your car your trying to unlock me this morning in Tesco car park

When you put the milk jug outside the back door and only realise something is wrong when the cat you are trying to put into the fridge objects strenuously.

When you only realise halfway through a shower that feels a bit odd that you're still wearing your bra.

When you blank on common words and find yourself saying 'arm knee' because you can't think of the word 'elbow'.

I spent 10 minutes this morning trying to find my socks that I'd just got out of my drawer, turns out I'd already put them on!

Driving home from the hospital in the dark after yet another emergency call out in an 80 hour continuous shift, and wondering why the wheels are spinning but I’m not getting anywhere.
Slowly realising that I’ve driven along what used to be the road before they started building the bypass. And I’ve driven into a large pile of sand and gravel left by the construction workers!
Glad that my young colleagues today don’t have to work the alternating 120 hour/72 hour weeks that we had.

When you go into a major panic about losing your car keys... while driving the car

Utterlyinsane. Your babygro experience reminded me of something similar that I did when my DD was tiny. I put the babygro on her upside down. I spent about 10 minutes trying to figure out why there were no feet at the end of the legs,and the sleeves appeared to have 'built in' mittens on them!

When you wonder why the printing is coming out blank, then realise that you put the originals in the copier upside down....

When your pour freshly boiled water into the coffee cannister, not the mug 😂

...when you're not only completely bamboozled by babygro poppers, but also the ones or buttons on blouses and on duvet covers, and in fact changing duvet covers at all.

There's always one popper or button. It's a conspiracy against the exhausted.

I set a timer for the fish im cooking for dinner and only realised 25 minutes in (when I'm ready to fry the chips) that I didn't actually turn the oven on.

...you put the kettle on to make a cup of tea, (you don't forget to brew it because you've got a whistling kettle), but you then forget it's brewing until it's stewed and cold. You put the kettle on again and brew another cup, but the same happens again. Eventually you do get your cup of tea, or you do but then forget to drink it, or you just decide to give up.

When you get to the railway station on the way to work and realise you have odd shoes on. In my defence they were the same shoe just a different colour

Haha yes I have driven off leaving double buggy on the footpath.

Today, I had been on Whatsapp, but needed to make a phonecall. So I was rooting around for about 5 minutes under various letters, in the bedroom, bathroom, it was like chaos. And I found my phone, propped up on my laptop. For some reason Whatsapp and actual phonecalls don't seem to be associated with the same item.

I frequently want to say something, but by the time the other person has finished, I've entirely forgotten what nugget of wisdom I was about to impart.

But mainly, it's when I literally can not physically get out of the bed. It's like my body just says Nope, not having it. And I try every sort of psychological twists on myself such as, just get a coffee into you'll be fine, once you have your shower, you'll be fine, just get up, everybody else is getting up!, get yourself out of the fucking bed you lazy ass, but body still says Computer says no.

@StillMedusa, the glasses thing is incredibly sweet.

Putting dirty washing in the bin instead of the washing machine! Also certain household items have disapeared and I suspect I may have binned them too!